A few times a week, I babysit for a little girl who is almost two.
Today, we opened the door to greet Emma and her daddy, and immediately Malachi (age 3) holds a plastic pistol up to her chest.
What a greeting.
And there sweet Emma is, with her little heart shaped red velvet purse in one hand and her pink baby doll in the other hand.
As Emma’s daddy was pulling the door closed behind him to leave, Malachi says, “Emma, I’m going to shoot you!”
Hm. I wonder if I’ll ever be allowed to babysit Emma again after today.
Surely its not that bad…unless sweet Emma says something like,
“Not if I blast out your brains first you bug-eyed scum sucker!”
:)
I don’t mean this meanly or sarcastically, am really curious – how do you reconcile being so religious and letting your toddler play with guns?
Nina – great question! I appreciate your concern about this.
Before having children, I was very opposed to guns and and was NOT planning on let my sons (if I had any) play with guns or other “violent natured” toys.
And then I had a son, and then another…and now we have FOUR boys!
I never handed my baby boys a toy gun to play with. But…it didn’t matter.
Boys (at least my boys) LOVE to shoot things. It’s how they are made…I guess it’s the hunter/warrior in them.
Even though I didn’t give my boys a gun, they would make them with something else: a lincoln log, their own hands, a banana…they would even sometimes chew their toast into the shape of a gun.
They aren’t doing this because they’re mean or violent natured. They love to defeat the bad guys. They do it to “hunt down some dinner.”
And yes, sometimes they do it because it’s just fun to shoot our friends who come over to play (like the way Malachi did to Emma as I wrote in the post). That’s my least favorite way for my boys to use their guns. And, my husband and I try to discourage that, of course.
But we’ve long ago given up on not having guns to play with. They are boys and act very much the part.
If I told them to stop acting like their lincoln log was a gun, they would make it be a light saber. And if I told them to stop that, it would turn into a sword.
While it is certainly not in MY nature to do this with my wooden spoons while I make dinner…I believe it is in my sons nature…and that it is so much a part of being a boy that they just can’t help it.
(Now you’ll all be picturing me in my kitchen stirring the soup…and when my husband comes home for dinner…I’ll pull the big wooden spoon out of the pot and say, “This is a hold up. Gimee all yo money mistah.”)
(Hm, actually sounds a little bit fun…Have I been living with all boys for several years, or what?!)
I’d LOVE to hear what the rest of you think about this issue.
Do YOU let your boys play with guns?
I have to agree with you, Laura. Before I had boys, I was adament that they would never “play with guns”, but I have had the same experiences.
Both of my boys, who are almost 6 and almost 3, play this way regularly. They don’t need a toy gun to play guns (in fact, I don’t think we have any actual toy guns), but they turn almost any toy into one OR they just use their fingers or pretend to be holding one. It isn’t violent play, but rather “little boy” play.
When I’ve expressed my dislike of this kind of play, my husband reminded me of all the times my brothers played Cops and Robbers or Cowboys and Indians. It’s truly just the nature of little boys to play this way, as they figure out good and bad, right and wrong.
Oh, and I had a rule for awhile that they could pretend to play with guns as long as they never pointed the guns at anyone. Again, my husband looked at me and said, “Well, it’s going to be kind of hard to play cops and robbers or cowboys and indians if they can’t point the guns at each other”. Okay… point taken. So now we just don’t point the guns at MOMMY!
I’m glad you weren’t offended by the question, I was really interested. I have only one son, with one on the way, but he isn’t aware of guns AT ALL yet – he’s only 3, and we live in NYC – no hunting here :o)
So while we don’t buy him guns, etc – I guess once he becomes aware of them he’ll just use sticks!
We have some friends who live and minister in East Hollywood, CA. It’s not someplace I feel called to but I’m glad someone does and I pray for them constantly.
A while back, we were visiting and one of the little boys made a “gun” out of legos or a toy car or something and “shot” his brother. Their mother gave a speech about how it is not fun to “play” guns because real guns really hurt people. That is a reality that is played out in their neighborhood all too often.
I don’t know how they handle playing with guns in general. And I agree that boys will turn couch cushions, food, sticks, etc., into guns whether or not they have actual toy guns and so it’s got to be OK on some level. But, I also think that (age appropriately) they need to be told that guns really do hurt people.
Those are my two cents. Check in with me in a couple years when my sweet baby figures out how his stuffed caterpillar that he loves chewing now actually can be a “gun”!