There are many things in my life that are important. There are many things that have to be done. There are great events to attend. There are many people in my life that I love and want to spend time with. There are hurting people everywhere. There are so many hurting people that my heart aches to feed them all, clothe them all, counsel them all and house them all. But I can’t do it all. 

I’ll choose to let go of the guilt.

I have to make choices and above all I have to choose my kids. They are the ministry God has given me and when all is said and done…what matters is my kids.

It doesn’t matter that no matter how hard I try, the laundry is never caught up. It doesn’t matter that the dishes constantly pile up by the sink, even though I’m pretty sure I wash dishes all day. It doesn’t matter that there are dirty windowsills and…what is that stuck to the pantry door? Oh well…it doesn’t matter.

What matters is my kids.

It doesn’t matter that I can barely get through writing this article because my kids keep coming in and interrupting me. They want to tell me about the game they’re playing together. They want to remind me about what happened at the soccer game. They want to ask what I’m making for dinner. I’ll stop what I’m doing and look at their faces and I’ll talk to them because it truly is a joy that they love talking to me. The article can wait.

What matters is my kids.

In the big picture, it really is okay that the emails are piled up even though I hate it that so many people have to wait for weeks for me to respond. It really is okay that I’m never caught up with my work and it really is okay that even though I’m working really, really hard…I can’t do it all. I’ll stop sweating all the details in my life that cause me to worry and get worn out. The details don’t matter.

What matters is my kids.

I’ll let go of the guilt and the pressure I feel about all the jobs around me that are left undone and instead focus my heart on my husband. I’ll cherish him and serve him and meet his needs and enjoy him. I’ll make our very limited time together meaningful because keeping our relationship alive and sweet is incredibly important. 

Because more than anything, it matters to the kids.

And they don’t care that we’re having pancakes and eggs for dinner again or that the living room is covered with boxes and bubble wrap mixed with lego men and building blocks. They don’t care that there are scuffs on the walls (they put them there after all) and they don’t care if the scuffs stay there forever.

What matters to them is the security of knowing that their mom loves them and takes care of them and laughs with them and trains them and prays with them and reads to them and talks to them. What matters to them is their mom understands one very important thing which is…

What matters is my kids.