Do any of the rest of you sometimes feel like you can just talk and talk…and nobody in your house even hears you?
Of course, I know it’s best to keep the orders short and sweet…like, “Come. Sit. Eat.” Parenting does seem to work better that way. But I guess I like to talk more than that or something. I’m better at pulling out…
“Okay, Big Guys…Mama made you some yummy food…so everyone come into the kitchen…no…go into the bathroom to wash your hands…oh…put your shoes away first…then go wash your hands…be sure to use soap….Asa, take Malachi potty while you’re in there…then help him wash his hands…then Justus, you come into the kitchen and get forks out for everyone…Elias then you please….
“Wait, guys…are you listening to me? Hey…guys! Yoohoo, over here! HEY! BOYS! YO, BOYS!!!!”
At this point I usually get a response like,
“Oh, did you need us to do somethin’?” (And of course only one of the four even says that much. The other three are likely to still be focussed in the land of imaginary super heroes.)
Sigh.
So, yes, I’ve learned to get their eyes on me first, then keep the command as short as possible (if I can possibly contain myself and reject the urge I normally have to launch into a lengthy string of wonderful detailed information about how I’d like them to carry out the task at hand.)
The usual exception to this problem is when we’re talking about DESSERT. At that time, the boys’ listening skills appear to be somewhat improved. Enough improved that I actually have hope for their wives someday.
But yesterday, I decided to let each of them have one last ice cream sandwich from our last Azure Standard order. We’ve been rationing them through the month since they are such a special treat. Which means…you’d think that when I say the magic words, “Ice Cream Sandwich” they’d…you know…HEAR me.
So I’m in the kitchen and I say, “Hey, you guys can each have one last ice cream sandwich today.”
Nothin’.
I try again, “If you want an ice cream sandwich, I put them in the door of the freezer.”
One responder, “Oh, can I have an ice cream sandwich?”
Me, “Yes, I put them in the door of the freezer.”
Boy (who shall remain nameless…yet you can make a guess and have a one in four chance of being right), “Where are they?”
Me, “In the door of the freezer.”
Boy, “Ooh, I’m gonna go have an ice cream sandwich!”
Me, knowing he might not remember where they are, “Great. They’re in the door of the freezer.”
Boy, standing at the freezer, “MOM!! I can’t find the ice cream sandwiches!”
Me, “They’re in the door of the freezer!”
Boy, “I can’t find my ice cream sandwich!”
Me, “THEY’RE IN THE DOOR OF THE FREEZER!!!!” (For Pete’s…sake.)
Boy, “Oh, in the door of the freezer? Got it.”
At that point, the other boys perk up and say, “Hey, how come he gets an ice cream sandwich? I want one!”
Me (gritting my teeth) “They’re in the door of the freezer… Eat it in the kitchen… Hey guys, I do not want a mess…take it to the kitchen and stay there…. Boys – KITCHEN!…”
Oh, to my dear future daughters-in-law…I’m trying, I really am….
I agree about the keeping it short and sweet and looking them in the eyes- but sometimes it gets to be frustrating when you sound like a broken record. Hello??? Is there an echo in here? ARgh! makes me want to pull my hair out. I’m always praying for the mothers of my future daughter in laws :-) Guess I’ll have to add the daughter in laws to the mix since they become the “second mom” to my boys-LOL
Ummmm, do you have access to some hidden web cam in my kitchen? ‘Cuz this is exactly what I go through with my girls! They NEVER hear me! (Unless I make some comment to my husband that I DON’T want them to hear! “Wait, Mom, who did you say yelled at her kids in the grocery store today? Mrs. X????”
I was cracking up at this recent post, as I have 3 boys ages 7,6, and 4. You completely described what goes on in my house regularly and causes a mom (me) who never used to yell, to yell. They don’t seem to hear me talking, so I raise my voice and they suddenly hear and cry, “mom, why do you have to yell?” “Well, did you listen when I was talking?” I like your advice about short simple commands, like sit, come, stay. Sounds like you are talking to a dog. :-) Boys, though, are so one track minded and truly are lost in the land of super heroes, or Star Wars action figures as mine are at the moment, and don’t hear their lovely mom’s voice unless you physically touch them or get eye contact, as you pointed out.
I have 4 boys myself and we go through this daily. It’s very draining.. LOL :)
Same thing happens at my house. Usually when I am cooking dinner everyone will ask seperately what we are having for dinner. Believe me by the 6th time I have heard that question I am not very patient!
Hmm…this is a conversation I have with my husband, YOUR cousin, on a regular basis! =) They never grow out of it!
LOL You’re post made me smile. ;-)
ahahahahahah this post was awesome!!!!!!
Too funny! I can see the exact same scenario playing out in my house!
Recently, to get my daughter to actually look at me when I am talking to her I say “Your eyes are beautiful…they are such a pretty green color. What color are my eyes? Are they the same color as yours?”
Then, once I know I have her attention and she is actually looking at me I’ll start telling whatever it is needed to say!
LOL! Selective hearing?! :D
Sherry hit the nail on the head… Hubby is guilty of this too sometimes. Just keep trying, it’s all you can do.
Believe me, this scenario is not limited to boys!!! I’ve decided that it must be something about the sound frequency of my voice that only the dogs can hear! The slightest whisper in the kitchen will bring the dogs running, but loudly calling (yelling) for the girls 15 feet away has no effect.
lololololol
I thought mine were the only ones!
I knew it wasn’t a ‘blond’ issue, cuz only one of mine is blond… and I’ve noticed that my little girl does this too but not as much, so I know it’s not altogether a boy thing but they do have a larger tendency to show signs of this disorder.
(Just wait ’til they get 16, then they’ll tell you: “Well, you talk too much and go on and on!” But then, they’ll turn right around and say, “Now what was it that you said to do?”)
But what I can’t get, is that they expect ME to listen to every detail of the last cartoon that they just watched….sometimes my DH walks in and I wave the closest white napkin that I can find! That means ‘damsel in distress’!
My 6 yr old just walked up and said ‘do I have to eat all of my food?’ and I laughed and said ‘I just told you five minutes ago that you could get up if you were full.’
You gotta admit, his timing is good!
Ohhh, yes, I’ve had so many days like that. I’m sorry your day went like that, but at the same time, you wrote it up in such a way that I was giggling through it! If it helps, I know *I* was listening! :)
As for your daughters-in-law, I hope they appreciate all your hard work!! A good young man is a wonderful thing to have.
Maybe it is just the universal language of motherhood that requires us to say things at least a dozen times before we’re heard.
You really tell a great story Laura! This was so fun to read.
That sounds like my husband and my nineteen year old son!
Laura I swear you’ve been the fly on my kitchen wall!!!! Change the names and you’re here a few years back. And now that they’re older the conversations are STILL the same just that I hear deeper voices instead of the little boys they once were.
Oh, my goodness, you had me laughing out loud! I only have one child, and she talks nonstop, so I can only imagine that times four!
~Kate
Which Proverbs 14:1 Woman?
http://proverbs14-1.blogspot.com
I don’t think I have had that exact conversation, however I have had plenty like that. In one ear and out the other with these kids.
Laura – Since you are wondering if anyone is listening, I thought I would let you know that I AM!!!! I made several of your recipes today and they were SO delicious. I made your mudballs (have made them several times), wheat crackers (OH BABY!!!), and easy beef and pasta casserole. My 13 month old daughter and 35 year old husband loved all of it. Please keep the recipes coming and a big thank you to you for all of your hard work in helping your readers become healthier.
Thanks so much!
To your future daughters-in-law – Hate to tell you, they don’t grow out of it! My husband STILL does stuff like that!
Too funny!
I also have four boys. You would think that at least one of their eight ears would be fully functional, but alas…
I’m also totally with you on the future daughters-in-law!
I have been known to have full conversations with myself “Can X come here and pick up the towel? *silence* Yes Mum, I’ll come and pick it up. Is there anything else you’d like me to do for you? Why yes, it would be great if you could make your bed, put your dirty clothes in the basket and get a hairbrush and brush your your. Of course Mum, anything you say Mum. Thank you sweetie, that’s very nice of you. No worries Mum, anything I can do to make your life easier…”
Then I hear either the Hubby or one of the two older girls call out “did you say something?”
*sigh*