Ok, Ladies. Today we’re gonna get real. Is it too much information? I don’t think so. I think this is worth discussing candidly. (At least today I’m not mentioning my gas. Be proud.)

So here we go.

One of my claims to fame is that I’m a great multi-tasker. This is especially apparent at my house, I believe, because I live in a household with five men and I am the lone female. So while each of my men-folk are often focusing on, and executing, one task at a time, I’m over in the kitchen knocking out twelve.

I’ve always seen this as a blessing for productivity but lately, not so much.

My brain is tired.

Matt can multi-task too, but he’s also much better at focusing than I am. Sometimes I watch Matt doing his one thing, thinking of only that one thing, not hearing the kids arguing in the background, not noticing the grime under the cabinet, not considering a potential problem with the plans we made for tomorrow, not seeing the stuff on the stairs that needs to be taken up and put away – and I’m like, “Man, I wish I could do that.”

I really do. Sometimes I long for the ability to just be in the moment, instead of thinking of past moments, potential moments, just in case moments, long term moments, and also dinner every night for the rest of our lives.

My brain wears me out sometimes. I want it to sssshhhhh every once in a while. Is this just me? Is your brain as loud as mine?

God wired women and men differently, on purpose, for a purpose. This is a good thing. Figuratively speaking, men’s brains are usually better at “pulling out one drawer at a time, closing it, then pulling out another.” Meanwhile, we women might find ourselves with all of our drawers pulled open at once, with items overflowing and toppling out, sometimes struggling to find where one ends and the other begins.

Both gifts are beneficial. Both have their limitations. Truly God is good in how He makes us different, with strengths and weaknesses that compliment one another.

So, the multitasking…

I’m grateful for the ability to get several things done at once. I’m also grateful to be learning my need for regular rest periods so I can help keep my brain from overloading and exploding all over the living room.

But, still, why can I not shut down my brain every time I want to?! (And here’s where it gets real…)

There are times I’m making a grocery list, or a to-do list, or thinking of a good blog post topic, or perhaps all of the above…

In the bedroom. (What?!) Yes. And let’s just say there are no notebooks or pens around and this is not the time to be making a grocery list. Do you follow what I’m saying?

I thought something was wrong with me. I’d be fine and in the moment, then suddenly my brain would shift to “I need to be sure I don’t forget to pick up cat food.” I decided I belonged in Crazy Town.

I thought I was the only one who did this. After all, this isn’t something I discuss with my friends. Who wants to admit to any other human being that they sometimes choose the worst time in the world to start thinking about laundry detergent (also did I remember to sign my kids’ waver and get it in on time, how should I answer that email, and I wonder if the shoes got put away downstairs).

Crazy. Town.

I have felt bad about this for years.

Then I made my way to Lesson Three in the Boost Your Libido eCourse I told you about recently – and suddenly Sheila was describing my brain as if she had been inside it (love her, be my new BFF, Sheila G.)! I did not know this but apparently, in regard to how a woman’s brain works:

I am normal.

Can you relate to any of this? Have you ever made a grocery list or any other list at the very wrong time?

Women do this naturally. It doesn’t mean something is wrong, and it definitely doesn’t mean that we should give up on special time with our husband (and instead head out to the grocery store).

What I love most about Sheila is that not only did she assure me that the way my brain works is normal, she followed up by giving tips to help my focus stay in the bedroom and off of the cat food. Her tips all make so much sense! I can do this! I am doing them, in fact.

Hallelujah!

So, my fellow multi-tasking friends – if you can relate to anything I just said, know that you are not alone, nor are you crazy.

Best news you’ve heard all day, huh?

I think it’s important to share truths like this with one another, even though it might feel a little bit awkward at first to bring it up. This is even better than talking about my gas, don’t you think?

I highly recommend the Boost Your Libido eCourse, which you can find here.

And while we’re on the topic of marriage, I will point you to a resource I created that has been fantastic for helping me love my husband God’s way: A Surrendered Heart. Get all the details about this Mini eCourse here.

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There are some gifts a husband can give to a wife (and vice-versa) that are a win-win all around. Take the time my husband gave me gas. Best. Gift. Ever.

You all know I’m talking about the time Matt installed my new oven with a gas hook-up, right? Okay, I figured that was obvious. What else could it be? Just in case you’ve forgotten the details though, let me give you a refresher:

Remember how my very old and over-used stove/oven finally gave out last year? Matt tried to fix it again for the many-eth time, sighed, and finally gave up. Then he looked up at me from his precarious half-in-half-out-of-the-oven floor post while holding the recently removed heating element and said, “Well, Babe. You want to go shopping for a new oven?”

Do I?

Flirting with my hunky repairman for a moment I said, “While we’re at it, you wanna know what my dream oven would be?” Of course he wanted to know, in as much detail as possible, no doubt. So I told him, “I want a white double oven – so I can make twice the amount of food in half the time. Just think of it! And also…

“I really want gas.”

Yep, every girl’s dream.

I knew it was a long shot. In fact, I really assumed it was an impossible shot. I mean, how can a girl get gas when her kitchen only has an electric hook-up?

Ah. Well apparently the girl has to know the right repairman. It also helps if the house already has gas hooked up in other areas of the home. These are only a few of the gas facts I have learned since that day.

Here she is, the day we brought her home.

My husband went to our basement and found our gas line. And who am I kidding right now? I have no idea what all he did to give me the gift of gas. I just know that he heard my dream and he cared enough to make it happen even though it was not an easy job.

You see now, don’t you, how this is such a win-win?

Every day, multiple times a day, I use my beautiful gas double oven with gas range. And every day, Matt enjoys the tasty bounty that comes out of these ovens and off of the stove-top. I’m happy. He’s happy. He didn’t have to do go to the trouble to give me gas. But he did and we both love it.

From Gas to…This? Well, yeah.

What can I say?

Lately I’ve been considering the many parts of marriage that are a win-win for both of us, gas being toward the top of my list right under companionship, protection, teamwork, being cared for….

And also one of God’s greatest gifts to married couples that sometimes causes us to blush and giggle when the subject comes up. Gas? Well, that too. But I’m actually talking about this: What God provides for married couples in the bedroom truly is a win-win. At least that’s the way He intended it to be.

But what about the times it doesn’t seem like a win? Mmmhmm. I know.

• Sometimes it may only feel like a win for him.
• Sometimes it feels like a gift that keeps on keeping us from getting to sleep at a decent hour.
• Sometimes it feels like something is wrong with me because while I know this really is supposed to be a gift – I don’t understand why it doesn’t always feel like it?!?

That’s the worst part. Not figuring out the bedroom thing perfectly every single time, and assuming something is wrong. Twenty-two years into marriage, while I have mostly loved and enjoyed this great gift, I’ve also gone through many different stages and changes and each new situation has led me to question:

What is wrong with me?

Raise your hand if you’ve ever felt that way. 

It’s a horrible feeling, particularly as we strive to enjoy a healthy marriage, love our husbands, and yep, even enjoy ourselves.

Truth —> Nothing is wrong with any of us! We are the way God made us. < —- Truth

Sheila Gregoire is a Christian author and speaker on this subject, and I think she is awesome to do so much research and tackle this necessary, sensitive, and fantastic subject with such care and godliness!

The past few months, I have been listening to and reading her work from her website and from her latest eCourse, Boost Your Libido. I have been so refreshed and encouraged to hear all of her words, including, “You are normal. This is the truth about how a woman thinks. Here’s some godly advice. Here’s what the Bible says about this.”

Not to dismiss the beauty of “the gift of the gas” in any way, but Shiela’s eCourse has been the biggest marriage win-win I have discovered as of late.

God really did intend for married sex to be a win-win. I hope you’ve found this to be true. This is truth.

I’m mentioning all this today because it’s fun to talk about my gas, and because Sheila’s Boost Your Libido eCourse is something I think every married woman should have.

Check it out here. Be blessed!

It is a win-win for you and your husband if you check out the Bible-based Boost Your Libido course. My husband has loved what I’ve learned, and he’s learned a few things too! ;)

Check out the Boost Your Libido eCourse here.

Care to share a special gift your spouse has given you? I’m wondering if your husband has ever topped the gift of gas? That’s a tough one to beat. But speaking of gifts —>

A Surrendered Heart

Remember the Surrendered Heart series I wrote a couple years ago?

I have found it incredibly beneficial to work my way through those lessons every few months to be reminded of my need to constantly be surrendered to the work of the Holy Spirit in my life and in my marriage. So that you, too, can have all of these writings, journal pages, and scripture printables in your hip pocket at all times, we just finished creating this:

We turned A Surrendered Heart into a Mini eCourse for everyone! This packet includes 42 pages filled with 6 Lessons with Biblical insights and instructions, worksheets, journal pages, and scripture printables. One of my designers made this packet gorgeous; God, of course, made the marriage truths found inside beautiful, powerful, and glorious.

I’m offering this because healthy marriages don’t just happen. Often, we need guidance, encouragement, and most importantly, we need frequent reminders to surrender ourselves to the Lord and to let go of selfishness. Like everyone else, through the years, I’ve needed help from trustworthy, godly mentors. I want you to have the above mentioned Boost Your Libido eCourse, by Sheila Gregoire, and this Surrendered Heart mini-course too.

Read more about the Surrendered Heart Mini-eCourse here.

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