Heavenly Homemakers

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Word of the Year 2026

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Word of the year 2026? Here we go.

I don’t always jump on this bandwagon, as is evidenced by the fact that I don’t think I’ve ever shared a Word of the Year here. God and I do tend to focus on themes though, and I can see that as I look back on the past decade as He’s grown my understanding of His power, grown our family, and grown my need for Him.

As 2025 wrapped up, I was made very much aware of a focal point for the past 12 months we just walked through. It was a full year in ways I didn’t expect, but a year that provided us with so much of what we’d been begging God to provide.

Answers

I declared Answers to be my word of 2025, and yeah, I landed there in the twelfth month of the 2025 because I’m not normal. But we all already knew this.

As I reflected on all the answers God has provided for us during a somewhat grueling 2025, I simultaneously recognized what would be a needed theme for 2026. It’s not a pretty word or one that makes sense for most. But it’s what I need, and I trust God will provide it.

Word of the Year 2026

God made it very clear at the start of 2025 that I would not be able to do all of the advocating, appointment making, and assessment taking without setting aside pretty much everything else, including down time. Finding doctors, setting up and executing appointments, filling out questionnaires, assessments, and paperwork, starting new therapies, working with the schools to settle in our kids and revamp IEPs and 504 Plans, welcoming ABA therapists into our home – it has taken an extreme level of energy and such a large chunk of time every day that it has been all consuming.

The reality is that the advocating will never end. The appointments won’t stop. Therapy is really just beginning. Our kids’ needs are huge. So I’m not deceiving myself into thinking, “Oh yay, 2025 is over and 2026 will be so much easier.” HAHAHA. That’s not true for any one of us. At our house, the work load we face daily is incredibly intense.

But within all of this, what does need to happen for my heart, my body, my mind, and my spirit is a time of recovery.

The work it took to get our kids to this point has been more than a full time job. I am very tired. Tired in a way that is hard to explain and is not sustainable.

I’m not worried, nor should you be. I’m ok because God is faithful. He led us to this specific Kingdom work and He hasn’t abandoned us. Quite the opposite – He is so beautifully in this.

But my goal for the upcoming months is to continue to do all that I need to do for my family while also finding more ways to rest, breathe, sit, sleep, relax, and be at peace. So my Word of the Year 2026 is:

Recover

Is this even possible?

Yes, with God, it is. Of course it is. Here’s what He’s already doing for us…

  • We’re establishing Mondays as a recovery day of sorts when our friend Emma comes over for several hours to help with the kids who aren’t in school yet.
  • We’ve already set aside appointment-free and work-free Friday afternoons so that Matt and I can spend time in the quiet together before the kids come home from school.
  • Our Sundays are the most beautiful and life-giving days of each week when we worship with our family, host a lunch in our home with dear friends, and sit with our community group to sharpen and grow each other. It’s hard to explain how this is truly recovery time for us when it is so people-filled and while we are hosting a large lunch gathering in our home. It’s just that Matt and I spend so much time caring for high need children that spending our time with loving adults who pour into us and our family in our home is richer and more fulfilling that just about any other thing I can think of.

  • Time with our grandbabies has been extra precious because we get to love on them and enjoy them in ways that bring us so much joy! Yes, our home is filled with children – but grandbabies are different. It’s hard to explain. But loving on them is such a gift, and it softens my heart and mind in ways that gives me energy and strength.

More Ways to Recover

I’ve been praying about what changes we can make so that we can spend some time in recovery. God is very good at providing in ways I can’t figure out on my own. So this time next year, it will be delightful to share with you so much of what He did for us that we didn’t think of ourselves!

Meanwhile, some things I’m brainstorming about:

  • Afternoon naps. I need them sometimes. But if I take a nap, that means something else has to be let go. So that might mean…
  • More frozen pizza. Or rotisserie chickens. Or whatever else takes some of the kitchen work load off.
  • Supplements. I’m experimenting with something that seems to be helping me sleep better at night. Plus, I’m taking some great vitamins to help me stay as healthy as possible overall.
  • Help. We are looking at more of our daily work needs and home repair needs that we can hire out or offload so that we can spend our energy differently to meet our kids’ needs and our own needs.
  • Appointments. As in – there are several appointments that I need that I’ve been putting off simply because I haven’t been able to make one.more.phone.call. I’m going to prioritize these now, starting with scheduling a massage with gift certificates I’ve been holding onto for a few months! Can I get an amen?
  • Dates. We are figuring out more ways we can get away for alone time together, just Matt and me, so that we can have respite.
  • Laughter. We’ve been talking with our adult kids and their significant others about somehow getting together every few months to play games without littles around. We’ll have to move a few mountains to make this happen, but laughing with our older kids is extremely life-giving for all of us. So move over mountains. I need laughing therapy.
  • Writing. Oh how I miss writing. When Emma comes on Mondays, we are trying to block out some of those hours for me to spend time writing. It’s so therapeutic for me!

Whatever God provides for recovery, I look forward to experiencing His goodness and faithfulness for us. I’ll keep you posted throughout the years as specific recovery needs are met.

Meanwhile, Arrow’s amazing cheeks provide joy in a way that resets me every time. And Little Sweetheart gives actual kisses to Lolli now. So, yeah, I’m recovering very well already.

Do you have a word for 2026? What has God been doing to show His goodness in your life?

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2026 Word of the Year: RUNNERS-UP

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A lot of words came to mind as I considered a focus for the new year. In fact, there are many 2026 Word of the Year: RUNNERS-UP. Read if you dare.

A few days ago, I shared that I finally have a 2025 Word of the Year. Woot! It only came 11 months and two weeks late. But it was the exact word we needed.

Indeed, 2025 has been filled with referrals, appointments, phone calls, assessments, getting diagnoses, starting therapies, and blessedly, finding answers to the intense needs in our home.

2025 word of the year? Answers. Praise God!

And guess what?! I already know my word for 2026! But I can’t share it yet. Instead, I must provide you with all the other words that came to mind as we live in a home filled with special needs, screaming, trauma, autism, and therapy. Are you ready?!? You aren’t ready.

2026 Word of the Year: RUNNERS-UP

12. Poopy Butt

Our younger set of kids are 12, 10, 7, 5, 5, 4, and 3. There are seven of them and five are on the autism spectrum. Many also have ADHD and/or are developmentally delayed, and so on and so forth.

But across the board, they can all say Poopy Butt and they are very gifted at saying it at the wrong time. They think they are either very funny and very rebellious, OR they like to become very self-righteous if they are not the one saying it but someone else is. “Mommmm! She said Poopy Butt!” Yeah, I heard.

I considered that Poopy Butt should be my word of the year because I hear it a lot and in truth, I deal with a lot of poopy butts. But then I considered that perhaps 2026 could actually be the year that everyone is…

11. Potty Trained

Is it possible? Might we have our final babe potty trained during 2026? He’s three now, after all. But he has special needs, so we won’t rush him.

Oh well though. If we don’t have a kid in diapers, I may not know what to do and I might still buy diapers in bulk out of habit. At one point we had five kids in diapers full time. So come at me with anything – you can’t scare me.

We are now down to only two kiddos sleeping in diapers and our youngest wearing them full time. What is this life of ease we now live??

As of right now, Auggie is only a little bit interested using the potty, so Potty Trained shouldn’t be my word of the year – just in case. The babe is less interested in the potty and a little more interested in saying “Poopy Butt.” Oh hey, but remember when we thought he might be non-verbal? So how thankful are we that he can form those beautiful words? So thankful. Actually though.

10. Food Smash

We crush more crackers and smear more noodles onto the table and floor than I wish to acknowledge. Many of our kids have food-related trauma and in addition, did you know that autism and trauma often create food aversions for kids? Multiply that times seven and you can’t imagine how difficult meal time is at our house.

Also, did you know that even if you put ranch dip on the plate the exact way that a traumatized autistic child asks you to do it, YOU WILL STILL DO IT WRONG? You will.

And when you do it wrong, a likely response a kid in our home has is to flip the plate onto the counter or the floor and smash it. Yes, we’ve parented this: attempted to discipline it, tried to prevent it, worked to retrain it, and have provided a million accommodations and options (do you want the pink plate or the green one? do you want to add the ranch or do you want me to? do you want the ranch on the chicken or beside the chicken?). Nothing works because autistic brains know exactly what they want but can’t always express it. So food flies, kids flop, and I don’t want to talk about it any more.

9. Accommodations

Speaking of providing options like pink and blue plates, this seems like a good time to talk about all the accommodations we’re learning to make for our kids. And about how we tell our kids to go put on their shoes and they actually cannot do it. Even though they can. They really can’t. (<–what?!)

We thought we were parenting wrong and that our kids were lazy, self-absorbed, needy people. As it turns out, they are autistic, delayed, and/or traumatized – so giving them a simple “demand” can make their nervous system go into fight-flight mode. So, for the love of sanity, we can’t simply tell our kids to go get their shoes. This creates meltdowns, and if you dare tell me that I’m spoiling them by bringing them their shoes and helping them get dressed, don’t. I’ve already scolded myself for what feels like bad parenting, but it isn’t. It’s providing accommodations. These kids’ nervous systems need to be cared for, and “demands” make their bodies feel actual pain. Crazy but true.

I hate it for them, and truthfully, I hate it for me. I want to be able to say, “Everyone go to the bathroom, get your shoes on, then go buckle into the van!” But I can’t. It doesn’t work. This is why I’m often crying by the time we finally get them all loaded into the van and we actually all make it to school or church. Just the act of getting out the door is ridiculous. Which leads me to another runner-up…

8. Dopamine

Goodness. One of the only thing that motivates many of our kids is “something exciting!” “something new!” “a treat!” This gives them a dopamine hit and they cooperate for a moment. It’s a weird new reality for us and I’d never heard of it. I just knew that transitions were awful and the only thing that got us from Point A to Point B was some sort of motivation. It felt ridiculous to accommodate this until I learned that this was normal for kids like mine.

We can’t go anywhere without “transition snacks” to help us get where we need to be. Go-Go Squeeze is the best invention ever invented to help us meet this need. See also: Capri Sun 100% Juice, Z-Bars, and sometimes, a simple Bag of Apples handed out as everyone gets buckled up in the van (while screaming).

7. Hyper-Fixation

Our world is filled with kids who discover THE BEST ROCK or THE MOST AMAZING BOX and for a time, that is all we hear about, all we can focus on, and no one better touch it or else. Also: REALLY COOL BUGS, TRETUROUS WEATHER (otherwise known as it’s flurrying just a little bit), SUPER LONG STICKS, ELSA, YARN, and LOUD AIRPLANES.

When one of our kids starts to hyper fixate on something, there’s no breaking away. This is the thing, and there is no other thing. Until there is. Then we move on to that thing. Jesus, be near.

Keith’s current box collection

6. Elope

I didn’t know this was a thing. Did you? Some autistic kids do this thing where they are here one minute, and then very suddenly, they are actually not here. Are they still in the house? Did they duck out to the yard? Are they in the street? Yikes. It’s worse, of course, when we are at the park or at the zoo.

Several have done it, and now our youngest, Auggie has to be watched every minute. At one point his hyper-fixation was climbing out of windows – on the second floor.

Have I shared that my nervous system is also often not okay?

Anyway, do you see why it’s called eloping? It’s quietly sneaking away and not telling anyone where you are going. If one of our kids suddenly finds themselves married in Vegas, well, will we be shocked?

5. Dysregulated

Think of the worst meltdown or tantrum you’ve seen, then multiply it times a lot, and then watch it last for two hours. Our precious children can get upset very easily, and there’s no reasoning, no explaining, no ignoring, no discipline, and no cuddling that can pull them down off that ledge. It’s sad and hard, and very disheartening to not be able to help our kids find calm and a state of peace once they have become dysregulated.

As a result of having so much screaming in our house, all while trying to keep everyone fed and in clean socks, I have found that I am often also dysregulated. Or at the very least, I’m quite overstimulated. The noise, the action, the needs – well. It gives me lots of opportunity to show my kids examples of taking a step back and taking some deep breaths. Also: So.Much.Prayer.

4. Wait

My kids don’t know what this means. But I do try and say it anyway, because I have to. I’m always in the middle of trying to help one kid (probably with shoes) when another one has a very sudden and intense need (like “watch me draw this cat mom mom mom MOM MOMMMMMMMM”). Each of them is very self-focused, a symptom of autism and trauma, so they don’t see much of the world around them. I could be literally putting out a fire and a kid would be mad at me for not stopping to get her some tape so they could affix a balloon (with a rock in it) onto a box.

3. Bathroom Buddies

This. This. THIS. I can’t go to the bathroom by myself. I so badly want “In-the-Bathroom-Alone” to be my Word of the Year. Oh how I do. But alas, I can’t sneak off to the bathroom without one to four children following me there. Not only must they join me, but one will then insist on being the one to open the door, another will insist on being the one to turn on the light, and I can’t just move them forward into or scoot them backward out of the bathroom because…hyper fixation. Meanwhile, I JUST REALLY NEED TO PEE.

2. Perimenopause

Ok, hello. No way is this going to be my word of the year. But it is something I get to learn about and enjoy, heh. Who has a houseful of little kids and gets to experience all the crazy symptoms of perimenopause? THIS GIRL. Am I late to the game? Yes. I think this is the result of welcoming so many babies into our home during the past several years and my body getting tricked into thinking I was still in my 30s. Haha, jokes on me. What a funny joke.

Anyway, perimenopause is no joke. I NEED SLEEP, MAN. Not getting enough sleep mixed with all the other wacky symptoms of perimenopause – while trying to meet the needs of my household? Well. Ask Matt how that’s going. Also, pray for Matt. He now has a wife that hysterically laughs while simultaneously sobbing. What is this madness?

1. Muffins

Through it all, the one thing that keeps us all going is muffins. I mean coffee. Uh, Jesus. Obviously. But beyond that? Our world is fueled by muffins.

I bake them in major bulk so frequently that without a doubt, Muffins could most certainly qualify as my Word of the Year. If I don’t have muffins on hand, the world might end. And of course, if I put a child’s muffin on the wrong color plate at the wrong time and while standing in the wrong place at our kitchen counter, the world also might end. So yeah, muffins. They both prevent meltdowns and cause them. It’s cool.

What is my actual 2026 Word of the Year?

Oh, please stay tuned to find out.

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I Guess I Finally Know My Word for 2025

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Wait Laura. You know it’s almost 2026, right? You just got your word for 2025?

Better late than never, ok? This time last year when 2024 ended and 2025 began, I didn’t know which end was up. We launched into the new year and I started to read many Facebook posts on people’s words of focus. I was like, “oh yeah. that’s a thing. people choose a word for the year. i used to do that.”

And those five seconds of thought were all I gave to a word for 2025.

All I could think of, instead, was WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HAPPENING IN OUR HOME?? AND WHAT DO WE DO?

Life at our house

As most of you know, seven years ago, we entered the world of foster care and adoption. One kid led to another until within five years, we’d added seven precious children to our family. This is, without a doubt, the most beautiful, blessed decision we’ve ever made. It is also the most difficult and life-changing.

As it turns out, being obedient to Jesus’ instruction to “lay down your life, take up your cross, and follow me” can be extremely challenging and ridiculously uncomfortable. I thought the foster care process would be the hard part – because IT WAS. But after all of our wonderful adoption days were in the books and we hung up our foster care hats, we learned that now the healing journey could really begin.

Our seven bonus children all have several varieties of extra needs, brought to them in large part by extreme traumatic experiences and exposure to drugs and alcohol in the womb. As Matt and I have walked this path with our babies, we’ve studied and learned all that we can about trauma, brain injury caused by substances, and how best to care for our children.

What we’ve learned more than anything is that God is faithful. His mercies are new every morning and His goodness never fails. We are on our knees more than we are on our feet, but with that, we know that we can STAND with the One who holds us up through His power.

Questions: What in the world is this??

The older these kids get, the larger their needs have become. And here we thought having five kids in diapers at the same time would be the biggest challenge. Bah. I wish.

As the kids have moved past the diaper stage (only one in diapers full time now, woot!) we have been blindsided by the screaming and yelling, the hitting and throwing, the fighting and meltdowns we endure with our kids, every day, multiplied by seven. As the months turned into years and the kids settled into security and safety with us, the meltdowns became more and more prevalent. Nothing we did as parents was helping.

This felt so shocking – because we have been parents before. We are on round two in our parenting life. While our four adult sons aren’t perfect, they are all incredibly wonderful humans who are an absolute delight to be around. Raising them was hard too, and we felt inadequate with them often. But with trial and error we grew together. To apply all that we learned while raising our boys and to not have any of it work this time around?? Oh, the discouragement and feelings of defeat.

Oh hey. Remember these cuties?

Our prayer changed.

Over our heads in trauma and questions, of course we sought additional help. But for a very long time, we got nowhere. I was shocked at professionals who couldn’t offer us any hope or point us in the right direction. No one is at fault in this. I’ve learned that it takes asking a lot of wrong questions to the wrong people at first to find the right people with the right answers. The phone calls, the meetings, and the appointments – so many ended up in dead ends. I can’t tell you how many times I heard:

  • We don’t take kids that age
  • We aren’t taking new patients
  • We don’t take that insurance
  • Would you like to have your child placed on our year-long wait list?
  • It’s normal; all kids have meltdowns
  • He looks fine to me
  • She never acts that way with me
  • Have you tried a sticker chart?
  • Wow, are they always this sweet and well behaved?

No. No they are not.

Our deep dive taught us what “masking” is – that our kids are very good at putting on a false front as a form of self preservation – and then the minute they leave the school grounds, get back into our van, or find themselves in the safety of our home – they let down their guard, the masks come off, and the screaming starts.

The worst feeling through this has been that I’ve felt like a parenting failure. If our kids could behave at school and otherwise, but completely lose their minds at home, we must be doing something terribly wrong.

Friends assured us that we were good parents. They saw our hard work and affirmed it. Their encouragement held us up and helped us stay on our feet. But why was nothing working and what could we do to make a change in our parenting world for the good of these kids? And who could we turn to for help?

Prayer, prayer, prayer

Over and over we asked, God, give us answers. Tell us who to call. What doctor can help us? What are we dealing with and how do we parent this? Please, give us help. Point us in the right direction.

And the prayer on top of that prayer: God, we need help in our home. We need professionals who can come into our home and see our kids in their safe place to witness their trauma responses and help us with the healing that we need. Is that even a thing? Help in our home with our kids? Please, Lord.

The screech of our baby boy

Interestingly enough, a breakthrough for help for all of our kids finally burst open because of the special needs of our very youngest. He’d had extra struggles from the beginning of his life which had provided referrals to specialist after specialist, starting in his newborn days. He was very delayed developmentally, had whole body tremors that were frightening, couldn’t eat without throwing up, and wasn’t learning to talk. From GI Specialists to EEGs to MRIs to Feeding Therapy to Speech Therapy to Neurology – we became very comfortable with people from Children’s Hospital.

It was at one of Auggie’s follow-up neurology appointments that the Pediatric Neurologist heard his high pitched shriek. She stopped our conversation. “Wait. Does he do that often??”

YES. All.The.Time.

And that’s where our questions finally started to turn into answers.

Developmental Pediatrics to the rescue

Auggie’s neurologist quickly put in a referral for him to visit Developmental Pediatrics in Omaha. I didn’t fully understand why a baby screeching would send us there, but I did know that Auggie’s frequent outbursts were atypical and I trusted his neurologist. More than anything, we deeply appreciated that we would soon be meeting with a team of doctors who specialized in the development of children’s brains.

February, 2025. That’s when we got our first diagnosis. After a very intense assessment with the Developmental Pediatric Team, we heard the word “Autism” for the first time.

I mean, not for the first time. We’d heard of autism before, of course. But for our family – this was a first, and also a turning point. Learning that Auggie met criteria for Autism Spectrum Disorder rocked us a bit as we weren’t expecting it –  but mostly it provided relief. Then as we learned more about autism, it all started to make sense for Auggie.

And also

During that appointment of Auggie’s – while we were working through his evaluation and assessments – all of our other kids’ behaviors and needs kept popping into my head. Every question that the doctor asked about Auggie’s special needs resonated with most of our other kids too. Because of this, at the end of his appointment, finally filled with hope, I tearfully asked the doctor, “How can I bring all of our other kids in to see you??”

We needed these assessments for all of them, and we’d finally found a place that heard us and welcomed our family. The doctor walked me through the paperwork and referral needs, and we started the journey of behavior evaluations for all seven of our kids.

Wow, 2025. You’ve been intense.

Millions of hours of questionnaires, phone calls, appointments, assessments, evaluations, meetings, and advocating later: we have answers. Throughout this year, we have taken all seven of our younger kids in for evaluations and diagnosis. Most to Children’s in Omaha. Some to Munroe Myer in Omaha. Some to a Psychologist in Lincoln. This process has been incredibly intense, multiplied by seven, and it has taken the entire year. But oh how thankful we are to have found the doctors we needed and to receive the diagnoses that help explain our kids’ needs.

Diagnoses

  • Five of our kids have Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)
  • Some have a PDA profile as a part of their ASD (This isn’t an actual diagnosis because it isn’t in the DSM-5, but it fits, so we are learning to parent accordingly)
  • Some have ADHD in addition to their ASD
  • Some have ODD, PTSD, and MDD (I’ll let you look those up if you’re not sure about them. Please pray for our children.)
  • Some have Alcohol Related Neurodevelopmental Disorder
  • Some have Global Developmental Delay (Intellectual Development Disorder)

In addition, we were able to take all seven kids in for Genetic Testing through Children’s Hospital. We will receive these results in the new year and we pray that the findings will help us meet the kids’ needs even more.

And as an added bonus, we were also able to take one of our daughters to an eye specialist which provided a non-serious but very helpful diagnosis as we watch for potential complications that could result in her need for eye surgery in the future.

I Finally Know My Word for 2025

Answers

Answers

Answers

God is faithful. He is good. He led us to the places and to the doctors we needed so that we could find the answers we’ve been longing for so that we can better help our kids.

Having so many specific diagnoses doesn’t take away our kids’ challenges. But it does help explain them.

The unfortunate combination of many of these diagnoses mixed with trauma and drug exposure creates a complex and humbling level of challenge to our situation. We’re learning that our kids’ brains are damaged in ways that can’t easily be explained.

This hurts and I hate it for them.

But oh how grateful I am to be their mom. Somehow, God chose me – chose us for this. I’m so very humbled and honored to be the one God asked to raise these dear ones.

Our calling is hard, but joining Jesus in His Kingdom work has grown us in ways we’ve needed. I don’t always love it. The hard parts of our days are excruciating. But I love God and I love my kids, so I’m all in. I love that Matt and I get to do this together. He’s the best teammate in this.

God’s double answer

Not only did God give us diagnoses, He provided in-home help that we didn’t know existed. We had prayed for it – but had no idea it would come in this form.

Because of the autism diagnoses we’ve received, four of our kids are now provided with in-home ABA therapy which gives them a one-on-one behavior technician to work with them to teach them coping skills, calming techniques, life skills – so much.

We now have multiple therapists in our home for up to 30-hours a week, sometimes three at a time. It is a circus. There are kids everywhere, therapist everywhere, meltdowns everywhere, adults in and out, and somewhere in there we also do homework, dishes, and laundry.

But would you look at that? God is giving us everything we needed and asked for. He will continue.

We have answers, more resources, more help, and we are becoming more and more educated about all of our kids’ diagnoses now that we know what the specific needs are in our home as we live in the trenches with so many amazing special needs children.

So stay tuned, if you dare. I actually already have a word for 2026 that I’d love to share. Though first, I plan to share my runners-up. :)

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Merry Christmas 2024 from the Coppinger Family!

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From our house to yours…

Merry, Merry Christmas!

John 1:1-5

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was with God in the beginning.  Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

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Introducing BabyBoy#11!

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Introducing BabyBoy#11!

We’ve loved him from the beginning. And by beginning, I mean that God turned my heart toward him weeks before we even knew he was on the way.

As soon as God put him on our hearts, we started praying for his protection and health. Even with our hands and hearts and days so full, we were ready to say yes to yet another yes from God.

When I got to go to the hospital to meet this new one for the first time, all I could do is cry and smile and tell him over and over, “We’ve been praying for you. You’ve been so loved from the beginning. God has big plans for you…”

When we brought him home, his brothers and sisters – ten of them plus two sisters-in-law – fell in love right away. Our BabyBoy#11 has never been lacking for snuggles and kisses.

Foster care doesn’t always end in adoption and in fact, the ultimate goal and hope for the first many months is that we can all work together for reunification. We love our kids’ biological parents and pray for them always. This time we were chosen to be our son’s forever family.

On July 31, 2024 more than 30 dear family and friends all headed to the courtroom.

The proceedings were short and sweet and yet, as his new, full name was declared by the judge I was overcome with emotion and gratitude.

Augustine Omega Coppinger

He’s our precious BabyBoy#11.

Auggie is too little to understand all God has done and is doing for him. But there are fifteen of us ready to help him learn the power of God’s plan and ability to heal. And now Auggie is an uncle too. :)

Here’s what Auggie had to say on the way home from his special day in court…

His smile says it all. You can bet the rest of us are wearing one just like it.

We love you, Auggie. We are so thankful to live out God’s plan with you.

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Word of the Year 2024

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This word leaves me speechless. It was given by God to both Matt and me for this year, 2024:

“Grandparents”

Asa and Eva announced their upcoming arrival to all of us on Christmas day. Not to discount the other presents I opened that morning, but most certainly this was my favorite gift.

We praise God for this joy and we look forward in anticipation to all that is to come.

Grandparents.

I like this word.

UPDATE:

Mr. Arrow Joseph Coppinger was born on June 17 and is a precious blessing to us all. His name comes from the beautiful passage found at the beginning of Isaiah 49. His parents, Asa and Eva, are amazing and we are so proud of them.

Lolli and Pop are overjoyed and grateful for the gift of grandparenthood!

 

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One Saturday at the Coppinger Castle

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Here’s a peek at one Saturday at the Coppinger Castle!

Over the weekend, I decided to snap pictures throughout the day to share what a typical Saturday looks like at our house. Ready to join the fun?

One Saturday at the Coppinger Castle

5:00 I fed BabyBoy#11, then put him back to bed and headed downstairs for some God Time.

6:20 Keith, Acacia, and Josie woke up and found me, wide awake ready to start their day! Since it was a Saturday, I turned on a show for them (something we don’t do on weekdays). Here’s a very blurry photo of Blippi. :)

7:00 We turned off the show and headed to the kitchen. I had made Applesauce Bread that week, so we sliced some for breakfast. We had leftover baked potatoes so I cut and fried them in butter with salt. So good!

7:30 I had started a load of laundry earlier, so Keith and I headed downstairs to put it into the dryer.

8:00 Matt and I decided to take the kids to our favorite library for a Sensory Story Hour – an awesome story time that caters to kids with extra sensory needs. This is so perfect for so many of our littles! We spent an hour getting everyone dressed and ready to load up. I made four juice cups for Keith, Anna, Acacia, and Josie to enjoy on the way home (they usually have juice around 10:30 every day).

9:17 We arrived at the library just a few minutes after the program was to start. Not too bad, with this many littles!

9:20 We found our special chairs and some weighted puppies, and got started with Story Hour.

9:20-10:00 The kids loved every minute of this special Story Time. Ms. Diane does a wonderful job. Today’s theme was Penguins. :) Even BabyBoy#11 focused in today. And look who’s learning how to clap!!

10:00-11:00 After the official Story Time was over, we headed into the main library area where there are educational toys to enjoy.

We spent some time in a little reading nook enjoying a few books.

11:00 Everyone started to scatter and get restless, so Matt and I decided that it was time to load up to go home. It was still a little bit too chilly to play outside, so at home I got out a craft kit that we’d picked up at Hobby Lobby a few weeks ago. Everyone colored Scarecrows and we put them together with brads.

11:30 More laundry, but this time with Anna’s help!

12:00ish We warmed up leftovers for lunch. There were leftover Instant Pot Mac and Cheese and Lazy Dogs. Plus carrots, cucumbers, and fruit.

12:30 I caught Brayden having a sweet moment with BabyBoy#11!

1:00 NAPTIME!!! After full mornings like this, we do appreciate it when 1:00 rolls around. :)

The four littlest napped while Brayden, Kiya, and Keith had an hour rest time and then went to play outside.

2:45 Josie and Acacia woke up.

3:30 Brayden came inside distraught because of a nasty conversation with a sibling so I suggested that he take a break, wash his hands, and help me make pizza for dinner. The idea completely turned around his disposition for the positive and he happily made a mess – I mean happily made pizza with me. :)

Meanwhile, Josie had started to feel crummy. :(

4:00 Once we got the pizzas ready, I put them into the oven but didn’t turn on the oven yet. We played outside to take advantage of the warm weather. By then, Josie had a fever so she just hung out with us on a bench outside.

4:40 I ran inside to turn the oven on so our pizzas could bake.

5:00 Elias came in and made salad to go with our dinner. We ate pizza, watermelon, and salad.

5:45 We played outside again, and I didn’t get any pictures. :) I did snap this one of all the clean dishes waiting to be put away. Slowly but surely we conquered the huge load.

6:20 We started the Saturday night bath process. This is a full-on two adult job. We usually start with the three little girls together in the tub. Then we switch them out for Keith and BabyBoy#11. While one parent is bathing, the other is diapering and jammy-ing the clean kids. Once the littlest five are finished, we help Brayden shower. Then Kiya. PHEW. Getting all seven bathed always feels like a huge accomplishment.

Here, Keith and BabyBoy#11 are in the boys’ room waiting for their turn in the tub.

7:20 Everyone is clean, jammied, and in the living room for Singing and Prayer time. While we’re singing, the girls take turns sitting on my lap so I can brush and braid their clean hair.

Poor Josie only wanted Daddy snuggles because of her fever.

7:50 We survived the day and some form of Singing and Prayer time with the crew. We finish our time in the living room by saying all of Psalm 23 together. Then we headed upstairs to brush teeth, put on Acacia’s leg brace, and tuck everyone in for bed. This is a loud, hectic process that often comes with some behavior struggles, along with the general craziness involved with herding cats tucking in multiple toddlers. Matt and I continually assess to try and figure out how we might make this time more peaceful, but I think if there was a way to do it, we would be doing it. For now, we continue to pray and ask for strength to model patience and calm responses through the bedtime storm.

8:15 BabyBoy#11 enjoys a little bit of 2-on-1 time with us while Matt and I decompress, talk about tomorrow’s needs, and give Baby his final swigs of milk before bed.

And that is a Saturday at the Coppinger Castle!

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How God is Providing Help Right Now

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I wanted to share a beautiful update as to how God is providing help right now.

In case you weren’t aware, we all need help from time to time. Saying yes to help is a beautiful thing. Our family happens to be in a season in which we need a significant amount of help in many forms.

Our help and needs continue to shift

During the past five years, we’ve added children and/or cared for children then helped them make adjustments back to live with their biological family. Mostly though, we’ve added children. Seven small, traumatized, extra needy, precious ones.

Meanwhile, during these past five years we’ve also had four kids in college, high school, and/or middle school – all of whom were very involved in extracurriculars like athletics, music, and drama. They’ve had their own needs because growing into an adult, navigating relationships, and figuring out career paths? Well we all know how hard (and good) that can be. We’ve also had two weddings, and OH YEAH, we moved to Lincoln this summer.

Ugh, moving.

The needs in our home have been different during these years, depending on how many babies there were, what sport season it was, what court case was unfolding, and how Matt and I have been able to meet the many needs as they come up.

Ultimately, we can’t meet them all. We serve a God who meets our needs in full. We trust this. And part of how he does this is by sending help.

I will never stop preaching this:

Say.Yes.To.Help.

Saying yes to help from others is saying yes to God. It is so cool to experience His work through others!!

We have had help:

  • Texturing and painting our house as we got ready to move
  • Cleaning. Worth noting: Ten ladies showed up to our York house after we moved out so they could deep clean all of the precious fingerprints and mud smears and 21 years worth of full, busy life there. I still can’t talk about that gift without crying.
  • Washing our dishes
  • Doing our laundry
  • Making us snacks
  • Chasing kids with us at soccer games
  • Buying diapers
  • Rocking babies so I could shower
  • Babysitting so both Matt and I could go to our older boys’ events at the same time
  • Cooking meals
  • Picking up items at the store
  • Babysitting while I went to court for our kids’ cases
  • Slipping us cash for “whatever the kids need”
  • The list is so long it would become an entire blog post all by itself…

These have been from an ARMY of people. Not just a couple of friends. Dozens of people. So many people I would lose track of the number if I tried to count them all.

And not one of these is “small” to me. Everything people have done means an incredible deal to us, even when they think “oh yeah, no big deal.” Yes, big deal. All of it.

So now we’re in Lincoln

We’ve been here for four months now. Different place, different people, different needs. Same kids. Same trauma. Same needy-ness.

More bathrooms.

Ten of them to be exact.

Praise God for this! And, thank God for my friends who come and clean several of them for us once each week.

Our older four kids have graduated now.

Matt and I have come up for air after our huge move. While we’ve had lots of help from our older kids and some church friends since moving here, we realized a few weeks ago that we needed to ask for more consistent help. Help with what exactly??

It’s hard to describe the needs of our kids – especially because they are all very sweet and those outside our home mostly experience all the sweetness (x7). Matt and I get to enjoy their sweetness too, for sure. But mostly, we find that we are training, and un-training, and retraining, and shucks, throw potty training in there too.

These kids have all the normal needs of a normal kid. And then they have trauma that they are dealing with in various forms. Their behaviors can appear subtle or non-existent to outsiders. But here are some examples of what Matt and I deal with all day long:

  • One of our kids went from absolutely fine at bedtime last week to suddenly standing on her bed RAGING because her sister picked up a piece of paper from the floor that was apparently very important (though not important enough to have been put in a safe place prior to getting into bed). Once she got angry and ramped up, it became very difficult to help her regulate her emotions so that we could reason with her.
  • One of our kids constantly needs reassurance that he is loved and safe. He looks over his shoulder constantly for the next emergency, and since there usually isn’t one, he creates one. Often he will bring us a “situation” and we will 100% take care of with a calm and peaceful solution. But he can’t let it go, so he goes to the next adult and then the next to continue to reinforce the drama he is seeking. This goes on all day long.
  • One of our kids is in fight or flight a good amount of the time, so a toy that drops to the floor or a sister that walks by and looks like she might possibly touch the toy he’s using sends him into a complete melt-down that takes a very long time to settle.
  • One of our kids demands so much attention that she will scream and tantrum, no matter the attention, consequences, or ignoring she receives, because her need for control is so great.

This work is WORTH all the energy and time we put into it. But this is why we say yes to help and have learned to reach out for help. We are stretched pretty thin. Any and all help is wildly appreciated.

How God is Providing Help Right Now

1. School Lunches

Recently someone offered: “Would it be helpful if we make lunches for your kids to take to school?”

Every school day. For the long run. This was/is their offer. I had to think about it for a minute (why, I don’t know). And then we said yes. The past two Sundays they’ve dropped of 10 sack lunches for the upcoming week. The kids LOVE it. I love it. And guess what? Paula and Randy, our dear lunch makers, love it. God is so good.

2. Childcare

We had lots of help with this in York, but so far in Lincoln, we hadn’t figured out what to do for regular help with the kids here. We know that we can be better parents if we occasionally have a break from so much hard-core parenting. So we prayed and God provided not one, but two sweet people to watch Acacia and Josie three afternoons each week for us.

Ms. Kathi keeps the girls for two hours twice a week.

And Josalyn watches them for two hours once each week.

Praise the Lord. The girls love these special afternoons and Matt and I enjoy the break so that we can work while BabyBoy#11 naps.

3. Whatever we need on Mondays

Our daughter-in-law Eva just blocked out one morning per week to come spend time doing “whatever we need.” This is huge because she knows the kids (her siblings, ha) so well and they know her. Plus she knows where everything is in our kitchen and sees what needs to be done and just gets it done. I love this.

4. Extra hands on Tuesdays

Justus and Kelsey come over on Tuesday evenings so that Justus can give Brayden a piano lesson. That one-on-one time Justus gives Brayden is huge for his confidence. Meanwhile, Kelsey uses that time to pour into the kids and I often use that time to load a dishwasher. :)

6. Brotherly Help

Elias is currently living at our Castle with us, and Malachi is in an apartment across town. These guys help in huge ways we asked. When Matt goes to York to work on our houses, often Malachi stays back to be my sidekick all day long while Elias goes with Matt to work. When I take Brayden and Kiya to serve at the weekly Food Distribution, Elias helps Matt with the rest of the kids at home.

And one of my favorite brotherly helps: Bro Time. 

We recognized Brayden’s need for some very specific one-on-on attention and devoted time, so we’ve hired Elias to spend two hours, twice each week with him. We call it Bro Time, with Elias taking Brayden on outings with the intention of really pouring love into him and helping him to learn more about being a healthy grown-up kid. They run errands for me if needed, they go to a coffee shop and play card games, they go take long walks around parks, they play frisbee golf, they do whatever Elias can find that will offer Brayden a good experience. About once each month, they buy groceries and cook a meal together for our family. Bro Time is good in every way.

7. Help with our houses in York

We still have properties in York that are being worked on so that we can sell them. Matt tries to go once each week, but it’s hard for him to get everything done that he needs to. We prayed for God to provide people who needed extra income to help with painting and odd jobs, and he has provided some young men willing to help out. I am so thankful for this!

8. Miscellaneous

I hesitate to share any of this because I don’t want to leave anything out. There are so many things people have done and continue to do to help. We say yes to all of it. All of our housemates pitch in and help with whatever need is right in front of them. People have given us loads of clothes for our kids (see Keith’s picture above in which he was so excited about his hand-me-downs box that he put on everything all at the same time).

Our neighbor brought us a meal when I was sick recently. Those neighbors also invite our kids into their house and give them extra attention and love.

Everything matters. Everything helps. Often people don’t realize that they’re helping – especially when they are engaging our kids in encouraging conversation – because they don’t know how much our kids need that encouragement. People are just being their normal, awesome selves, and it means the world to us.

Thank you for letting me share ways God is at work for us. When I look for it, I continue to see more ways He is providing. It’s amazing and we marvel while we give thanks for his goodness in all these ways.

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The Castle Laundry Room

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I’ve had a lot of requests that I share about our Castle Laundry Room. Here it is!

Our laundry room is in the basement, and it is a huge, functional room!

But here’s a little reminder of what our laundry room looked like the first week we moved in. It was FULLLLLL of linens and towels – like enough to run not just a Bed and Breakfast (as this property had been used before we purchased it) but enough to run a hotel. We spent hours clearing it out so that we can use it for our family’s needs.

We carted out 18 big black yard waste bags full of bedding, and then I stopped counting. I think Goodwill probably didn’t know what hit them that week. ;)

—>Pssst! Here’s an explanation of why we are calling our house our Castle. God is good, and this shares some of His goodness in meeting our needs. <—

Once we got the room cleared out, we started to form a plan – one that I’d thought of before we moved in.

See, my dilemma was that I do laundry for our seven littles plus Matt and me. We are all on the second floor of our Castle, and laundry is in the basement. You can imagine that laundry for nine people is quite a bit of laundry! I didn’t love the idea of lugging it up and down stairs over and over and over. And most of our kids are too little at this point to lug it themselves.

I had already stopped folding the laundry

Remember this? A year or so ago, I gave up on folding the 7 littles’ laundry. Here are all my reasons and I hold to the fact that this makes everything SO much easier. Folded onesies for BabyBoy#11 are ridiculous, toddlers rummaging through drawers destroy folding anyway, and even our 8 and 9-year-olds can’t keep their clothes folded long enough to make it from folding spot to drawer.

Folding clothes became a pointless job, so I gave up and do this instead. Now that we had moved into our Castle, I took this idea to a new level.

No dressers. All clothes stay in the laundry room.

We have an entire wall of shelves in the laundry room that are now like this:

When I do a load of laundry, instead of lugging it upstairs to our second floor to put it all away, instead I toss each item of clothing into its correct bin, cube, or basket. Like this:

This is a game changer! I still don’t keep up with laundry, but I sure do keep up better than I would if I were lugging laundry up and down, folding it all, and putting it away in dressers.

What I do lug upstairs

Matt and I do have dressers, because we’re grown ups and can handle them. They are in our bedroom because we don’t want to go to the basement for our shirts. :) So after I’ve sorted the seven littles’ laundry out of each load, I take these upstairs:

  • Matt’s clothes
  • my clothes
  • kitchen towels
  • bath towels

Sometimes these sit in the basket for days. Sometimes I empty the basket and put everything away in twenty minutes. It all depends on what is a priority at the moment, and usually, the priority isn’t putting away laundry. :)

How does it work to have the littles’ clothes in the basement?

It’s working great! We weren’t sure – would we really want to go to the basement every time we needed something for one of them? Well, as it turns out, we’d either be going up (to the second floor) or down (to the basement) – so it’s the same amount of steps no matter what. And being able to stand at the dryer and toss clothes directly into their tub? Amazingly efficient! Overall, we save a lot of effort doing it this way.

And Brayden, Kiya, and Keith – who are old enough to dress themselves – can go to the basement, change out of their dirty clothes, put their dirties in the hampers, and put on their clean clothes all in one place. At the beginning of each day, I run to the basement and grab clothes for the littlest four and head upstairs to start the process of getting them dressed. Easy! (I mean, as easy as it is to dress four toddlers/baby.)

I suppose you might want to see the washers/dryers?

The white set we brought from our York house. The silver set we inherited with the Castle. They are NICE and they are big. As are my piles of laundry – one of which is featured here.

We don’t actually have the white set completely usable yet, so at this point, we’ve all been using the big silver set. Somehow, this is working out fine – even with 16 people’s laundry being done here! Having the second set available will be nice eventually. But there are so many other priorities right now (like feeding the children and keeping them out of the street).

So there you have it! The Castle Laundry Room!

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