Last week I told you how I was taking care of chickens for my friend who was out of town, remember? And remember how I told you that I was nervous that I would do something wrong and kill a chicken? I am so very happy to report that I started out with 50 chickens…and there are still…as far as I know…50 chickens.
And two roosters.
Two mean roosters.
Yeah, I’d forgotten to tell you that part. My friend Susan was walking me through all of the elements of chicken care: “Here’s the feed…here’s the hose for water…”
“Oh,” she says, “And if the roosters try to attack you, just whack them over the head with the feed bucket.”
If the what? The roosters might attack me? I’m supposed to what? With the feed bucket? Uh…oh…okay… That doesn’t make me scared or nervous at all. <cough>
Each day last week, the boys and I would go over to do chicken chores. The boys would gather the eggs while I would courageously feed and water the chickens.
Each day I would scope out where the roosters were and make sure I stayed out of their way. ‘Cause I really didn’t want to have to whack a rooster over the head. Not even a little bit.
So, everything went fine and I had no rooster attacks to tell you about.
Until Saturday. I made it all the way to Saturday.
I had kindly filled the water…thingy. I had sweetly filled the chicken feeder with feed. I even smiled (albeit nervously) at the roosters in appreciation for leaving me alone all week.
And then it happened.
Not one, but both roosters simultaneously charged at me…at the same time…together.
But don’t you worry. I bravely jumped into the air in shock and fear…and screamed something that sounded kind of like, “Aaahhhhhhh….aaahhhhhhh. Aaahh. Aah.” (‘Cause that will stop a rooster from charging.)
And I sorta swung my bucket and hit one of the roosters barely, which made him look at me like, “Seriously? Is that all you’ve got, lady?”
In which I answered, “Yeah, pretty much. B-bye.” And I hightailed it out of that chicken coop.
It is a GOOD thing I’d already given those chickens feed and water, because I still haven’t gotten my heart rate back to a normal pace….and there is NO WAY I was going back in there that day.
Anyway…I returned home unscathed…and I’m sure the roosters are now completely intimidated by my presence, what with my strong muscled bucket swinging and high pitched shouting.
Yeah, whatever.
Okay, now to the menu. (Which just might include Roasted Rooster on a platter…)
Sunday, July 20
Oatmeal, orange slices
Lamb chops, corn on the cob, grapes
Nachos
Monday, July 21
Whole wheat waffles
Tuna salad, strawberry-peach slushies
Chicken and rice, carrots
Tuesday, July 22
Fried eggs on toast, bananas
Homemade macaroni and cheese, peas
Swiss steak, new potatoes, green beans (hopefully fresh from the garden!)
Wednesday, July 23
Chocolate swirl muffins, applesauce
Chicken tostadas, pineapple
Spaghetti, tossed salad, corn
Thursday, July 24
Scrambled eggs, fruit smoothies
Meat and cheese burritoes, pineapple-orange slushies
Pack snacks to take to Farmer’s Market
Friday, July 25
French toast
Turkey and cheese melts, carrot sticks, milk shakes
Biscuits and gravy, eggs, potatoes
Saturday, July 26
Breakfast cookies
Cheesy turkey sausage stromboli, mixed veggies
Tacos…or Roasted Rooster…depending on how the next few days go… :)
I’m kidding of course..about roasting a rooster.
(I might make rooster soup instead.)
Check out more menu plans at Organizing Junkie!
LOL – glad to hear the chickens are doing well and all accounted for. Pineapple and orange mixed together is my favorite. I have to try that slushie.
Alright, I’m seeing the whole thing and laughing hysterically in my head!! (My little ones are asleep)
I’ve recently gotten the ‘farming bug’, although my parents say they have to see it to believe it!
Thanks for the heads up on roosters!
I have to say I was excited to see your recipe menu!! I just finished up a series on meals, in hopes of getting some feedback.
Due to food sensitivities since my last pregnancy, we’re switching over to a more natural approach to eating. It’s really hard when all I’ve ever eaten was frozen or out of a box.
Can’t wait for more time to browse your site!! (Found you through Biblical Womanhood)
Candace
http://www.heaveninourhomes.com
http://www.heaveninourhomes.blogspot.com
HA – I love the rooster story!!!!
The chocolate swirl muffins sound delish… might have to give those a try. We have tons of peas in our garden, so we are eating them and freezing them and giving them away… eating out of our backyard is so much fun!
You are too funny Laura! I bet those roosters are still cowering in fear.
Your menu sounds delicious. I have been looking for a good swiss steak recipe for a long time and haven’t found one yet. I’d love to hear yours.
Have a fantastic week!
You are so a braver woman than me!
Way to go you rooster fighting momma :)
We had a rooster that got mean, and he taught one of the other two to get mean. I was around 8 months pregnant when they started charging me. At first I thought it was an accident, but then it happened every time I went in the chicken yard, and one of them jumped up to kick our then six year old son. They never used their spurs, and we tried for months to train the meanness out of them, but our friends in the poultry world told us to eat them, because there were too many good roosters out there to tolerate an aggressive one (or two). It’s a shame, really, both were beautiful and one really was good at guarding the hens, but we couldn’t have our children collect eggs, and I had bruises on my legs that lasted for months.
So, we ate them. It’s stew when they’re that old, though, not roast. We had chicken and rice, and it was quite tasty. We also kept our nice rooster and picked up a good, defensive, but gentle and mellow toward humans rooster. He is still a good rooster, protects the girls and doesn’t attack.
We learned where the phrase cock-eyed came from dealing with those two, though. They would literally look at you sideways before they headed your direction – like they were trying to trick you.
How terrifying! But, I can totally picture it in my mind. Great story and glad you escaped unpecked! Great menu. Your biscuits and gravy for dinner on Friday sound delicious! I always forget that breakfast foods can make a supper too.
I can’t imagine taking care of 50 chickens and two rooster. I helped a friend out once and she had 9 chicken. I glad you walk away unpecked. I was wondering about your recipe for whole wheat waffle. It calls for coconut oil, can you a different oil?
I entertained the notion of chickens briefly (yum, eggs!), but if I do get them in the future, I’m going to have to watch out for mean roosters. I guess I better get a feed bucket and practice my swing!
Slushies are a great idea, and those look delicious!
The Rooster Story is too funny – thanks for the morning laugh! I can’t wait to try your Breakfast Cookies!
Glad you, chickens, and meanie roosters are all okay. I can relate to your story, although my experience was with ill tempered geese!
Your menu sounds great! I will have to try the breakfast cookies.
Okay, I know I came here to check out your menu plan but I *loved* your chicken story! But I can tell you, you handled the charging roosters better than I would have. Good for you. Back to menu planning, your week looks good and I keep looking at your breakfast cookies thinking I should make them … and never quite get to them. I think I am too lazy to make cookies. Cakes, cupcakes, even muffins but cookies … nope. I like to clean up my kitchen while whatever bakes. Cookies you have to keep putting the pan in, taking ’em out. How about a dandy breakfast muffin recipe without a ton of sugar? I might make those then! :)
Seriously though, have a wonderful week … sans chickens!
Kiy
I am laughing because I just was talking with a friend who had peck marks all over his legs from his roosters! He said it hurts pretty bad for the first hour and then goes away. Pretty funny coming from a 6 ft 3 former special forces police officer. Laura- you are lucky you escaped with your life :)!
Toni
I am laughing sooo hard cause I am picturing the whole thing in my head! :D
Your menu sounds delicious! I am going to try some of those slushies this week!! :) They sound good! :)
I am glad all turned out well feeding the chickens and (mainly) avoiding the roosters, and that you are able to laugh about it. You had me laughing hysterically :) Thanks for stopping by my blog today, I’m so glad to have joined the menu plan monday group. Can’t wait to try out your recipe for breakfast cookies!!
Take care,
Steph
My husband had to rum into the room to find out what was so funny and I couldn’t do anything but laugh, and flap my arms toward the computer! We had an evil goose here a couple summers ago and it was a LONG summer.
I am so glad you are okay, and I bet he would taste GREAT roasted stuffed with garlic!
Not everyone can say they’ve had an experience like that! :)
Your menu looks healthy and tasty. I love your variety of fruits and veggies.
And I thought the roosters would only attack me when I was stealing the eggs, not feeding them. I must say, I unknowingly let my guard down.
Chandra, who was supposed to be protecting me from the roosters, was instead attacking me with the hose.
Okay, THAT was hilarious! I could hardly read the whole story for the tears in my eyes! Why do funny things happen to everybody but me!?!?! HA! Oh, Laura…that was good. I’m actually sorry you had to experience a rooster attack, but selfishly, it made a GREAT story to help my day go even better.
Much love…Talley
I laughed so hard at this story! I had to read it out loud to my husband but I was cracking up so badly that I could barely finish reading it! You write wonderfully. We have chickens in our backyard but they are all hens. Right now we are in a fight with the city to keep my “girls.”
In addition to being very, very funny, it sounds like a great menu also!
Thanks.
Jill
I know this is an older post but I remember my father had two VERY mean roosters, and three young daughters so he gave them to my grandpa well what was he thinking we went there every day one day I was out back by the chickens and sure enough I got chased all the way around the house and into my dads car, they wouldn’t let me out, I hate roosters!