We just got back from a very long road trip to Arkansas. 12 hours one way.
Matt couldn’t go with us, but since we were heading to a family reunion, my Uncle Kenny drove with us, making the trip a million times easier for me. The boys were perfect travelers. We all had an awesome time visiting with everyone. The boys played with cousins until the cows came home.
Until the cows came home…really Laura? First I was flying by the seat of my pants, and now the cows are coming home. Where did they head off to in the first place? Do they have a curfew? What will they do if they get lost? Do they have a GPS system?
Some clichés make sense to me. Flat as a pancake? I get that. Actions speak louder than words? Yes indeed they do. My kids prove it to me daily when they act in an unbecoming way that no doubt they learned from me. Ugh.
But really, some of these phrases completely drive me nuts (batty, bonkers, up a wall). I mean, have you ever wondered what hog heaven must be like? It sounds muddy to me, no bones about it.
I’ve never had any ducks, but I can’t imagine getting them into a row would be very easy. And how happy are clams anyway? Do you suppose they are as happy as a lark?
I feel like if I were to literally keep my nose to the grindstone I’d be pretty limited in what I can accomplish during the day. After all, I’m usually busier than a one armed paper hanger. This is why there actually have been days that I have cried over spilled milk. I couldn’t help it.
I’ve never had any money burn a hole in my pocket, for which I am grateful as that may be more painful than being on pins and needles. And besides, a penny saved is a penny earned. Money doesn’t grow on trees, however I do feel like I’m rolling in the dough, what with all the bread I have to make around here to keep up with these kids who can eat like a horse.
I do tend to joke around a lot, but count on me to never to pull your leg or step on your toes. Neither will I let your cat out of the bag. Hey, if you want to keep your cat in a bag, that is where it should be, although I have no earthly idea why. Then again, I’ve never walked in your shoes.
Sometimes you’ve got to take a bull by the horns, but you can’t squeeze the blood out of a turnip. And that is the whole kit and kaboodle.
Know any more great clichés? Go ahead and share…until the cows come home. I’m all ears.
Mandy says
My papa always says he’s busier than a one-legged man in a butt-kicking contest. Cracks me up every time. :)
Amy Lynne says
My dad says that too! Love it!
DorthyM says
Coming up with cliche’s should be as easy as taking candy from a baby. But really, who would want to do that? That makes the baby scream, and screaming babies tend to make one more nervous than a long tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs. Maybe that’s why the cat’s in the bag in the first place. It’s safer than all those rocking chairs. Now if you ask me how I’m doing I’d probably say I’m finer than frogs’ hair. To which you would replly you’re just as stubborn as a mule because I continue with the cliches. But I’d just let it roll off like water off a duck’s back.
LOL. Just teasing. But just to show you how nerdy I am, I know where the term “till the cows come home” came to be. I have no idea if this is still done but at least as recently as the pioneer days the family cows would be driven to a part of the grazing land or pasture so they could eat. Each evening someone would have to bring them back. Once they were back in the barn for milking or whatever that signaled the start of evening chores so I guess you really could do something till the cows came home.
At any rate, thanks for the laugh with the post.
Tracy Harvey says
Bob’s your uncle! It means as easy as pie (although pie isn’t always easy) It has something to do with Someone named Bob getting a very prestigious title simply b/c he was the uncle to someone LOL Hubby learned this from an englishmen or Australian (can’t remember which) that he works with, and who uses the phrase all the time.
Lisa says
Wow…I loved this post!!
It was the greatest thing since sliced bread = )
Jenj says
That was so funny! Started my day off on the right foot. I’m not sure when I ever start out on the left, but the right definitely feels good. Thanks!
Shannon says
I bet when you got home your husband thought you were a sight for sore eyes! :)
This was fun, thanks!
Lisa says
HAHAHAHA! I am just chomping at the bit to think of something witty, but it appears the cat’s got my tongue! :)
Rochelle says
I’m happier than a tornado in a trailer park that you had a good trip! “Tow Mater- Cars” But maybe we shouldn’t include Larry the Cable Guys Cliche’s! Not always family friendly!
melanie says
ha ha ha ha ha ~ You all are bright-eyed and bushy-tailed this morning! =)
{eyes I understand ~ but what is the tail business about anyway?? Are we talking squirrels or a bad hair day?}
Kimberlee says
Great post, Laura! Thanks. I needed that. Anyway, just for laughs, I thought you might like to know that ducks (usually ducklings)sometimes walk in a row, but most often in a cluster once they are older. However, getting them to go where you want them to go is like herding cats… (and who has ever done that?)
Taylor says
You are hilarious! You bowled me over! :)
Lisa Reed says
Have you ever read the childrens books “Parts” “More Parts” and “Even More Parts”? They are filled with cliches that have to do with the body. (e.g. I’m cracking up, by the skin of my teeth, broken heart, etc.) You, and your kids, would love them!
Serene in Singapore says
Thanks for this amusing post. Gonna share it with the kiddoes and ask them to me how many cliches they can spot and what they mean – can it count as a language arts lesson? :)
Julie says
I don’t know about you, but I often feel busier than a cat trying to cover two holes.
Jennifer S. says
This was great. And I do know when a clam is happy – at high tide. The entire saying is “as happy as a clam at high tide”. I guess they’re happy then because no one will be digging them up. :)
Keya says
Oh Laura… I’ve had more than I can stand of cliches for today, but that was truely knee slapping funny! BTW- I just finished baking your recipe for chocolate chip cookies. My kids just love them!! Thanks for sharing
jerilyn says
I say “hold your horses”
my 3-year-old says “I don’t have any horses.”
:)
DorthyM says
I cant help adding that I had to tell someone else some information obtained “straight from the horse’s mouth.” When they speak of beating a dead horse (poor animal) I do hope its not the same one.
lindsy says
Well this post is about as funny as the day is long! It sure made me laugh my pants off :)
Abby says
oh. my. word.
gotta admit, you made me smile, Laura. ;)
Travelin Pilgrim says
Laura, you are just way to funny! I ’bout died laughing on this one!
Where in the world do you come up with this stuff!!
Thank you for sharing! It made my day!
Kelly says
you came to arkansas?? man, i wish i had known. i live in arkansas and would have driven the distance just to meet you!! great post!! that was just so funny. i can’t for the life of me think of any cliche’s to include probably because that’s just normal talk for southerners!! : )
Shelly says
Oh this is wonderful!! My grandmother has always spoken in cliches and colloquialisms. We have added these many sayings to our households’ vernacular. Some of her more hilarious ones are:
It’s raining harder than a cow peeing on a flat rock!
Well, doesn’t that just take the rag off the bush! (when circumstances are less than pleasant)
He’ll have a cat with a crocheted tail. (if he’s mad)
There are so so many more, but to come up with them spot on can be difficult. I know that I will think of thousands for the rest of the day! FUN POST!!
Julie H says
Great post, Laura!
“Slower than molasses in January” and “Them biscuits are so good they’ll make you wanna slap your granny!” (only heard the last one since moving to Tennessee…and the people here are so friendly!) And one I didn’t get until I was an adult…”you lie like a dog” LOL!
Julie H says
Oh, and don’t count your chickens until they hatch!
Linda says
WOW! You are so creative.After a 12 hour trip you must have slept like a log.
Kari says
You silly goose! I guess this is what happens after 24 hours of driving! Grandpa Martin would have been proud of this post. I’ll have to point it out to Randy. Love you…
P.S. I’m busier than a one-armed wall-paper hanger but I’m glad I took time to read this and the comments.
Jen W says
“Hotter than a June bride in a feather bed” comes to mind… you know, since it is June and you were in Arkansas for crying out loud! Opening the doors and stepping outside in the summer there is like stepping into a sauna. My glasses even fogged up! I am so glad we moved to Pennsylvania! It is currently 70 degrees outside. I love it!!! The winters here, however, are just about scary. Whenever we told people we were moving here, they always said, hasn’t anyone warned you about the snow? To which I replied, “I love snow!” Now I know better….