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Worship

December 8, 2011 by Laura 3 Comments

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~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~~Mentor Relationships~Nourish~Own It~
~Pray With Each Other~Quick to Listen~Read Together~Selfless~Teamwork~Uplift~Vulnerable~

Worship

Connected – Matt’s Thoughts

Woven throughout our healthy marriage posts is the theme of connectedness. A healthy marriage consists of two people connected to each other. Marriages that honor the Lord consist of two people connected to our Creator. So, a healthy marriage that honors the Lord consists of two people connected to our Creator and to each other.

That is our aim and our desire for you. When I consider the periods of our life when we experienced this at its best, by God’s grace, it has been due to our times of worship together. I believe that is because worship is both humbling and empowering. Humbling because I’m interacting with the Creator of the universe. Empowering because I’m interacting with the Creator of the universe. What doesn’t bode well for my marriage is when I get arrogant or selfish, or conversely, feel useless or incompetent. I’m not the center of the universe, but the One who is the center of the universe is living in me!

Although we urge you to worship together in group settings with other Christians, we want you to also think outside the box…err building. My view of worship may be a bit broader than others, but when I consider Psalm 148, for example, and that the sun and moon, mountains and hills, lightning and hail, plants and trees, and animals and humans are all urged to praise the Lord, my view of worship expands. God’s creation praises Him by being (and therefore doing) what they were created to be (and do). What are the two of you created to be and do?

But What If… – Laura’s Thoughts

This is our aim and desire for you. This is likely your aim and desire also. What if, however, your spouse doesn’t feel the same way about pursuing a relationship with the Creator? Your spouse is not a robot. You can not program him/her to do and to be what you want.

Do not lose hope. God is stronger, more powerful, and more willing than we understand to do more than we ask or can imagine. Your personal worship and devotion to God can and will bring the light to your household that you desire.

Worship with your spouse is beautiful, but if this is not an option for you at this time, do not underestimate the power of your own personal worship, praise, and heart-cry to the Father. He is listening. He can bring about that connectedness you long for, both with Himself, and with your spouse.

Let your life be worship, with your spouse, without your spouse, all the time.

God will be glorified.

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Vulnerable

November 18, 2011 by Laura 4 Comments

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~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~~Mentor Relationships~Nourish~
~Own It~Pray With Each Other~Quick to Listen~Read Together~Selfless~Teamwork~Uplift~

Vulnerable

Surgery on Your Soul – Matt’s Thoughts

Purposely make yourself vulnerable? Although that flies in the face of the human desire to have the upper hand in a relationship it has been my experience that vulnerability, which is seemingly weak, has made me stronger. Hopefully you can follow my choppy thoughts.

In a healthy marriage two people are so connected that they go beyond commonplace communication into touchy topics that make themselves vulnerable. They allow themselves to be vulnerable yet they are confident that they won’t be attacked. The two talk about everything: temptations, in-laws, physical intimacy preferences, conflicting opinions and stances, sin in your life, fears, failures, confusing issues in life and in your faith journey, sin in your spouse’s life, and other difficult topics.

The two talk about everything, both shallow and deep because they are friends. Friends listen. Friends build up. Friends even wound when necessary. As a matter of fact, the meaning of the root word in vulnerable is – to wound. The “wound” is truth spoken in love from your dearest friend who wants the best for you. Like the Biblical Proverb says, “The kisses of an enemy may be profuse, but faithful are the wounds of a friend” (27:6). So, part of making yourself vulnerable is allowing your spouse to do surgery on your soul.

But who wants surgery?!? Well, when there is floating cartilage that locks up your knee often enough surgery becomes an option. When a sizable cancerous tumor is detected, then removal by knife will be chosen.

I am a sinner. I want a healthy marriage. I need the knife that removes the floating cartilage and cancerous tumors in my soul. I need the faithful wounds of a friend.

And so, becoming vulnerable by sharing my weaknesses with my wife/friend so that she can gently do surgery has made me stronger.

The Gift of Vulnerability – Laura’s Thoughts

Whether we realize it or not, being vulnerable is a gift we can give our spouse, ourselves and our marriage. Don’t try to put up walls to protect yourself from what you might learn while being vulnerable. Trust your spouse and share your heart. There is great beauty in opening yourself up to hear what you need to hear, to share what you need to share, and to love in a way that is so free you’ll wonder why you ever held back.

My greatest moments of personal growth have come from the times I am vulnerable to Matt and let him help me work through my weaknesses. If I ask, “What can I do to stay calm when the boys are trying my patience?” or if I tell him, “I am really struggling today with my feelings toward xyz. I need to forgive and I’m not sure how,” Matt doesn’t love me less. In fact, when we open ourselves up and share intimately, this is when we grow the most – both in our marriage relationship and in our relationships with the Father.

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Uplift Your Spouse in Prayer

November 11, 2011 by Laura 8 Comments

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~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~~Mentor Relationships~
~Nourish~Own It~Pray With Each Other~Quick to Listen~Read Together~Selfless~Teamwork~

Uplift Your Spouse in Prayer

Intercessory Prayer – Matt’s Thoughts

Blogs are great because run-on sentences are acceptable. So, here goes.

I pray for my children, the elders of my local church, the movers and shakers of our country, those with specifics needs I know about. I pray for those in tragedies many miles away because that is sometimes the only way I can help. But I feel like I can pray best for myself and the one I know most intimately, the one I share the most joy and pain with, the one I’ve failed the most, the one who needs my grace, the one I’m teaming up with to parent our children, the one who lives with my annoying habits, the one encouraging and sharpening me in my faith, the one who vowed for better for worse, for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health until death do us part, the one I committed myself to for life, the one…praying for me.

No Greater Gift – Laura’s Thoughts

Wives, we can try to do all the right things. We can cook his favorite meals, work to manage our home in a way that is most pleasing to him, and try to meet his needs in all the ways he prefers. But none of these tasks are as important to our healthy marriage as making it a priority to pray for our husband’s needs, and asking God to grow his character into the godly man he needs to be.

Husbands, you can be a hard worker, provide well for your family, help out around the house, and work to meet your wife’s needs in all the ways she prefers. But if you are not praying for her, bringing her needs before the Father, asking God to work in her heart for His purposes…something vitally important will be lacking in your marriage relationship.

There is no greater gift we can give our spouse than the gift of prayer. Uplift one another before God. He’s waiting to hear you and to work in your relationship in mighty ways.

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Teamwork

November 4, 2011 by Laura 5 Comments

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~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~~Mentor Relationships~
~Nourish~Own It~Pray With Each Other~Quick to Listen~Read Together~Selfless~

Teamwork

1+1 is … – Matt’s Thoughts

I absolutely love teamwork. I loathed my chores when I was young: folding laundry, doing the dishes, dusting, vacuuming, cleaning the sinks and toilets. I couldn’t do these activities while playing Atari or eating a Scooby snack with “Raggy.” Then my sister and I figured out synergy. Well, we didn’t know the word synergy or its definition – a mutually advantageous conjunction – at ages 11 and 12 but we found out that we could get our chores finished quicker if we worked together. The teamwork routine was that we put off our chores until 30 minutes before mom would be getting home and first we’d frantically do the chores that had to be completed going solo. Then we’d holler from another room, “Ready to do teamwork?” Then, it was almost fun as we accomplished more in a few minutes than we could have by ourselves in twice the amount of time. The flurry of joint activity would complete just as mom drove up and after a high five we could act like our chores had been finished hours ago.

What if in marriage we could “do teamwork”? The Teacher says in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, “Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.”

Man’s math is 1+1=2; God’s math is 1+1 > 2

In a healthy marriage because of God’s grace two individuals united accomplish more than the sum of its parts. To sum up and confuse more, God makes the two become one (1+1=1) and yet the two are greater than two (1+1 > 2).

The Negative Equation – Laura’s Thoughts

God’s math works every time. When a couple is on the same page and selflessly working together, they can accomplish so much more for God’s kingdom than they can accomplish as individuals.

But I’d also like to throw in another math equation. In a marriage, if both spouses aren’t working together in a selfless way and are instead tearing each other down, 1+1 can actually be less than one.

Since that equation doesn’t match up with God’s math, I guess we’d need to say that 1+1 < 1 would be the math of the Enemy. Satan would love to see you and your spouse destroy each other so that not only are you no longer effectively pursuing God’s kingdom as a strong Christian couple, you aren’t even productive as an individual.

Which equation are you going to choose? Are you going to pursue teamwork, which in effect produces much for the Kingdom; or are you going to live for yourself and treat your spouse in a way that chips away at their productivity?

If your spouse isn’t building you up, don’t let that give you an excuse for being less productive. And if you are the spouse that needs to step it up and become more of a team player, consider yourself kicked in the pants.

Be what God calls you to be. Anything less just simply doesn’t add up.

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Selfless

October 28, 2011 by Laura 8 Comments

This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see our disclosure policy.

~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~~Mentor Relationships~
~Nourish~Own It~Pray With Each Other~Quick to Listen~Read Together~

Selfless

Symbiotic Relationships – Matt’s Thoughts

Just a reminder in case you forgot: The universe does not revolve around you…It revolves around me. HaHa and Ouch because that’s what I’m constantly fighting. I need the reminder found in Philippians 2:4, “Each of you should look not only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.”

When the universe revolves around me, then the relationships I form are self-serving. I befriend someone who is an encourager in order to stroke my ego. I spend time with another so that it will make me look good. I get married for what I’m going to get out of it. God’s design is best, where a relationship sharpens both people (Proverbs 27:17).

At our family trip to the Omaha Zoo this summer I learned about the three different symbiotic relationships – parasitism, commensalism and mutualism. Symbiosis is “the living together in more or less intimate association or close union of two dissimilar organisms” (from merriam-webster.com). (It makes me laugh when I connect symbiosis to marriage as the “union of two dissimilar organisms.”)

Let’s each evaluate our role in our symbiotic marriage relationships while defining the three types. Does your role fall into the category of parasitism where you are living entirely for yourself to the detriment of your spouse? Maybe commensalism sounds more like the way you treat your spouse. You obtain benefits from the other organism in your more or less intimate association while you neither damage nor benefit them…even roommates should perform better. If you are, instead, selflessly laying your life down for your spouse and your spouse is doing the same, then you are practicing mutualism- a mutually beneficial relationship. Healthy marriages are mutualistic relationships where you serve and sharpen one another because you are selfless.

True Joy – Laura’s Thoughts

I have found that when I am truly seeking to live selflessly, that is when I am most joyful. Ironic, isn’t it? I would think that my happiness would overflow each time I am able to get my own way and do things exactly the way I want to do them, thankyouverymuch.

It is okay to allow yourself to be served, to be encouraged by others, to spend time with people who will make you a better person. But if your heart is focused on self – getting, doing and having things your way – and not on what you can give, do and share with others, you will never experience true joy.

It’s a beautiful thing when a husband and wife both seek to serve one another selflessly. Needs are met, bitterness and anger fade away, and true peace and joy fill the home.

Selflessness begins with you. Who are you living for?

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Quick to Listen

October 14, 2011 by Laura 6 Comments

This post may contain affiliate links. For more information, please see our disclosure policy.

~Appreciate Your Spouse~Buoyancy in Marriage~Consult Your Partner~
~Dream Together Part One ~Dream Together Part Two~Empower Your Spouse~
~Have Fun With Your Spouse~Give to One Another~Honor Each Other~
~Be Intentional~Jubilee~Kingdom Focused~Listen~
~Mentor Relationships~Nourish~Own It~Pray With Each Other~

Quick to Listen

A Family Motto – Matt’s Thoughts

Most interactions in any relationship can benefit from the maxims, “Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” (James 1:19). Boy, do these ever benefit a marriage relationship. I’ve tried being slow to listen and experienced the results there. I either needed to sheepishly ask Laura what she said because I wasn’t listening or worse yet, I tried to guess what she said and go with that. Your guess to where that has ended up is much more accurate than my guess was at what I didn’t listen to.

I’ve also practiced being quick to speak and found my foot in my mouth. The taste of the sole of my shoe is all too familiar.

And yes, I’ve been quick to anger. That dirty Kleenex that missed the trash can means that I’ll have to pick it up when I take out the trash!!! I’m incensed!!! (That’s me throwing a terrible two’s tantrum.)

We posted about listening and looking into each other’s eyes for our “L” marriage tip, and we wanted to add more to it. James 1:19 is one of our family mottos. We try to repeat it often because we need to remind ourselves often and train ourselves. As a soccer coach I know there are fundamentals of the game that must be practiced very often in order to improve our game/skills. Likewise, in life, we feel that these are a few of the fundamentals in relationship development. Practicing these in our family will prepare our sons to be skilled when interacting with others and if they do marry someday, then these can improve the health of their marriage.

Hurry Up and Wait – Laura’s Thoughts

I’m trying to understand what it looks like to be “quick to listen”. Usually, I’m quick to jump to conclusions, quick to spat out something off the top of my head without giving it much thought, quick to make a judgment on someone before I know the whole story. None of these practices are healthy in any relationship, but they can be particularly harmful in a marriage relationship.

So what does it look like to instead be “quick to listen”? Could it be that I simply learn to simply be still? To be calm and wait? To listen with my heart to the needs of my beloved?

I try to be quick about every aspect of my life. I find I can get a lot done in a day by being quick about my work. But I think if I were to be quick to stop, be quick to be still, and be quick to listen to what God would have me to do, I may accomplish more for Him than my “quick” efforts ever could. I think I could go from a frantic mode to one of calm and peace.

And it’s likely that if I’m quick to walk to the trash can with my dirty Kleenexes instead of trying to throw them across the room in hopes that one out of ten might actually make it to the destination, I will save my dear husband and myself much time and frustration. I’m working on that one. ;)

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Pray WITH Each Other

October 7, 2011 by Laura 18 Comments

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Pray With Each Other

Innermost– Matt’s Thoughts

Praying together is ultimate intimacy. The origin of the word intimate comes from the Latin intimus meaning “innermost.” So this isn’t, “Thank you God for this wonderful day, and our many wonderful blessings. Help [insert name here] get better. In Jesus name, Amen.” I’m talking really pouring it all out to God allowing your dearest to hear your heart and hearing your dearest pour it all out to God. You are being intimate with both your creator and your lover. That’s what I mean by ultimate intimacy. Healthy marriages contain spouses laying bare together physically and spiritually. Yes, you make yourself extremely vulnerable in these intimate moments. Isn’t it great? Thank you God, that we don’t have to keep all of life’s struggles and joys packed inside. How great it is to share and bare your heart to the Lord with the one you’ve united yourself in marriage to.

While your innermost feelings flow out to the Lord, you are also hearing from the heart of your spouse and being heard. These connections to our Creator and our life-long marriage partner are vital. Sometimes, due to our busyness of life, different perspectives, or just plain oversight, we are unaware of a load that is weighing down our spouse. I have found that I am able to “check Laura’s pulse” by praying with her. How is she doing? How can I encourage her? What specifically is burdening her?

Why don’t I pray with her more? It is so beneficial for us. The excuses of time, exhaustion, fear of being heard, selfishly not really wanting to hear her, or whatever else I use in my head just disallow me from stronger unity with my Creator and my Companion. We all desire this ultimate intimacy.

Start Today – Laura’s Thoughts

If you’re not used to praying out loud with your spouse, this may possibly sound a little bit stressful to you. Oh, but can I urge you to work toward it anyway? It is beautiful to experience, these moments with you, your spouse and God.

If you, as a couple, are not already in the practice of praying together, one of you must take the lead to make this happen. Men – I strongly encourage you to be the one. Offer this gift to your wife.

And Gals – encourage this leadership in your husband. Open your heart up to God in front of your man. You can do this.

When you pray as a couple, your marriage bond can strengthen in ways it simply can not strengthen otherwise. Prayer is powerful and effective.

Do you and your spouse pray together? If not, what do you feel is holding you back?

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Own It

September 29, 2011 by Laura 2 Comments

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Own It

Man in the Mirror – Matt’s Thoughts

The invisible wall between the two of you looms larger than China’s Great Wall…and yet you are in the same room. Though audibly silent, the decibel level inside the two heads match a jackhammer. You blew it. Your spouse has been wronged by you and he/she is upset. Excuses and people or circumstances to blame fill your head. There are plenty of them. And wow, he/she needs to calm down. They have wronged you before. Remember the time when…HOLD UP!!!

How ’bout a little 80’s flashback to the only Michael Jackson song I reference in a serious way. Remember these lyrics? “I’m starting with the man in the mirror, I’m asking him to change his ways…”

No more justifying, rationalizing or faulting others. And don’t you dare dig up the past.

Take ownership of your action (or inaction) in your mind and heart. Take ownership verbally by speaking the truth without any caveats: “I was wrong.” “I acted selfishly.” “I blew it.”

Genuinely apologize and seek forgiveness from your spouse. If your spouse is still livid, forgiveness may not be extended to you right then. I’m going to advise you not to ask for confirmation on the spot. You may want to suggest a cool down period and then revisit this later.

Whether grace is offered immediately or not you must ask yourself, “What do I need to change so that I don’t do this again?” Don’t ignore this step or you’ll find yourself in the same room with your spouse with the Great Wall between you…again. Make a plan to fix it and share this plan with someone. It may be best to share the plan with your spouse. It may also be beneficial to call in help from a friend who will hold you accountable.

Oaf used to be how I felt after I blew it with Laura. In my head I was telling myself, “You big oaf!”

Now OAF is the acronym for the action steps after I’ve been a big oaf: Own it, Ask for forgiveness, Fix it.

Once more from Man in the Mirror: “If you want to make [your marriage] a better place take a look at yourself and then make a … change. Yeah! Make that change!”

But I Have Baggage – Laura’s Thoughts

Wow, I have to say that I never thought we’d reference any of Michael Jackson’s songs here at Heavenly Homemakers. I’m a little bit speechless. (Okay, not really.)

I think Matt makes a great point – why do we always tend to blame others when we have done something wrong? Sure, we all come into the marriage relationship with baggage. Some of us more than others. This can be incredibly challenging and makes life and decision making quite a bit more difficult. But it doesn’t excuse you from making bad choices and hurting others, particularly your beloved.

Did you do or say something you shouldn’t have? No blame-shifting. No excuses. Own it.

Easier said than done, but who said doing what’s right is always easy?

Hey, at least it’s easier than trying to do the Moonwalk. (That was totally irrelevant, but if Matt can reference Michael Jackson, so can I, right?) (Oh wait – did I just blame-shift?)

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Nourish Your Marriage Relationship

September 23, 2011 by Laura 4 Comments

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Nourish Your Marriage Relationship

I Heart Gardening – Matt’s Thoughts

Okra, sweet corn, green beans, tomatoes, jalapenos and best of all sweet bell peppers. Our garden plots have been producing those for us this year. Last year our green beans didn’t yield very much, but our sweet bell peppers have consistently performed well. We rotate where we plant most of our veggies each year and I’m convinced that the soil where we planted the green beans last year lacked nourishment. The one exception to rotating our crops has been the sweet bells. They are my “babies” that are always planted in our raised garden bed. If they don’t thrive then the year has been a disaster in my opinion. I mix all kinds of nutrients in that soil and make sure they are given proper care so the fruit will be fantastic!

Yeah, this is a marriage post, so I’m guessing you can tell where this is going. Let’s make some connections in this metaphor. I have several relationships (garden plots). The more time and effort I put into nurturing a relationship, the better opportunity (soil) there is for that relationship to be healthy (produce a good harvest). Some of my relationships have grown strong and then faded through the years. I’m convinced it is because they haven’t been nourished as well. The one relationship I have committed to put above all others is with my wife…she is my “baby.” Since she is my highest priority (raised garden bed) I want to mix all kinds of nutrients into that relationship and give her proper care so our marriage will be healthy.

Check out this ginormous red bell pepper from our well nourished soil. Go Big Red!

Empty Calories – Laura’s Thoughts

I’ve shared in the past how sick I got physically when I wasn’t getting enough nourishment. A diet consisting of lots of Pepsi and other empty calories can and will slowly suck the life out of a person. I learned this the hard way. We must have healthy nutrients in our bodies in order to thrive physically.

Are you, as the wife or husband, sucking the life out of your spouse, feeding your relationship full of empty calories and causing your marriage to be unhealthy?

Are your actions and words encouraging your spouse to be more godly, more productive and more loving…or are the things you do and the words you say tearing down your spouse and wearing him/her out? The more you fill others with the garbage that flows out of you, the less nourished your relationship with that person will be. It is incredibly wearing on a person to constantly have to work at pleasing you, satisfying your whims, guessing what your mood will be like today and so on.

Don’t be a 2-liter bottle of wasted, life draining calories to your spouse. Instead, be intentional about offering nourishment in the form of words, actions and attitudes that build up, encourage and refresh the soul of the one you love.

In what ways are you nourishing your spouse?

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Mentor Relationships

September 15, 2011 by Laura 13 Comments

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Mentor Relationships

What School are You Paying for? – Matt’s Thoughts

“How much better to get wisdom than gold, to choose understanding rather than silver!” (Proverbs 16:16) I’ll Amen that.

“Wisdom is supreme; therefore get wisdom. Though it cost all you have, get understanding.” (Proverbs 4:7) Amen to that too.

Now, how do I get me some of that wisdom and understanding that I so desperately need?

Most of my life I’ve been enrolled at UHK (University of Hard Knocks). UHK has an amazing presence. There are satellite campuses everywhere I go. But in my shining moments I’ve sought out a mentor and avoided the expense of UHK.

As Laura and I have aimed for a healthy marriage, we also have looked to some couples modeling a healthy marriage who are farther down the road in their marital journey. We have watched them from a distance and visited with them couple to couple. We’ve been encouraged from afar and challenged by their words. We’ve heard their regrets, taking them to heart so as to avoid UHK for ourselves, and we’ve taken mental notes regarding their victories so that we can attempt to gain the same outcome.

Why don’t we do this more often, rather than paying room, board, tuition and fees to UHK? Many times it’s because I’m chasing gold and silver rather than wisdom and understanding.

How can I get me some wisdom?

“Listen to advice and accept instruction, and in the end you will be wise.” (Proverbs 19:20)

Red Flag Relationships – Laura’s Thoughts

Most of us tend to gravitate toward those who are in the same stage of life we are in. Singles like to hang out with other singles. Young marrieds like to spend time with other young marrieds. Parents with babies like to get together with other parents of babies. And on it goes. This is all great and truly – many of our best friendships are based on the fact that we have so much in common. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with spending time and enjoying others in your stage of life – unless those are the only people you spend time with.

We’ve seen marriages destroyed because couples were not willing to look beyond their 20 or 30-something age group for companionship, guidance and encouragement. We’ve been heart-broken to see relationships crushed because young couples were spending too much time with other young couples. It’s dangerous – watch and be aware of how close you are becoming with other couples, especially if these relationships are purely for fun and hold little spiritual depth. Let a red flag be raised and make changes in your couple-to-couple friendships if you begin to find yourself becoming too “comfortable” with your friend’s spouse.

Be intentional about spending time with couples who will sharpen you, encourage you and make your marriage stronger. Seek out couples who have been married longer than you and who know more than you about maintaining a healthy marriage. Don’t be afraid of people who are older and wiser than you. Sit at their feet, ask questions, soak in what they have to say.

Your healthy marriage depends on it.

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