I really appreciated that so many of you left comments sharing your thoughts, struggles, and insights as to why eating a healthy diet may be difficult for you or for others. I have experienced all of these same feelings and shucks, I still do sometimes.
I have definitely not “arrived” when it comes to this healthy eating journey we’re all on. My family does not eat a completely healthy diet at all times. There are many times that I compromise on what would be the best choice to feed my family. There are times I pull out cereal because I can’t make myself get out of bed in the morning to cook the breakfast I have planned. There are times when, while I totally know better than to buy the chips with hydrogenated oils in them, doggonnit, I want them anyway and I don’t care what’s in them, so there. (Which is why you should never dangle a Nacho Cheese flavored Dorito in front of me. I will eat it. I love those awful things.)
Doritos aside, there are many areas of healthy eating I haven’t mastered yet. And guess what? I don’t even know if I want to master them. How’s that for a bad attitude that sort of flies in the face of my “No More Excuses” intro post? I don’t love eating completely raw foods. Fermented foods, while they are great for digestion, aren’t my favorites. And soaking grains? I’m beginning to find that practice very annoying and am therefore becoming a bit rebellious about it. There, I said it.
I’ve run the gamut of emotion on this healthy eating journey I’ve been on for the past several years. The biggest feeling: Guilt. Now that’s a fun one.
Guilt when I don’t feed my family perfectly. Guilt when I don’t feel like cooking. Guilt when I know I could be doing better. Guilt when it feels like other moms are feeding their children a healthier diet than I’m feeding mine. Guilt when I read about what someone else is doing, but I just don’t feel like I want to go there yet.
Which is what leads me to the point of this post: Please do not let anything I share on my blog, and specifically in this new No More Excuses series, overwhelm, frustrate, annoy, or otherwise make you want to throw Doritos at me. (On second thought…) :)
I want to share my thoughts in the No More Excuses series to encourage you to consider how you might be able to feed your family a healthy diet and help you know that it is possible for you. But let’s also subtitle it the “No More Guilt” series, because we women have to stick together. We may all be in different places in our healthy eating journey, but we’re all on the same team. No comparisions allowed. No guilt. No pressure. Just encouragement and ideas, sharing and inspiring.
And maybe, the occasional Dorito. Someone stop me.
Laura, you make me smile. Thanks for such a great post.I have done everything from the SAD diet to the Traditional WAPF diet with fermented foods, grains, etc. I’m just getting back on track with a more traditional diet but find myself overwhelmed with it all. I am a homeschool mom of two boys and have a 3 month old baby and fear I will get drowned with all I should be doing food-wise and will throw in the towel…again. Thanks for the reminder to just do what I can for where I am in this season of life. I am looking forward to your new session on the blog!
Wow, thanks for sharing that! With a 3 year old and a 5 month old, I find it daunting to keep up with everything required to eat healthy. But I’m gonna keep at it!
I’m in!! So glad you’re keeping this positive, helpful, and guilt-free! THANK YOU!
We all need some wiggle room in our diets, and no need to feel badly about it. No one is perfect, we just do our best. Can’t wait to read the rest of this series! Love the encouraging vibe!
Laura,
I appreciate your sensitivity, and it is readily apparent to me that you seek the Lord first prior to writing your posts and He gives you eyes to be gracious. Thank you for encouraging us to do our best, try something new, and to never compare! :o) Sharon
Thanks for your honesty. I’m sure none of us have it perfect but it is nice to hear that the ones we look up don’t have it perfect all the time either. Looking forward to this series.
That should say “look up to”. Keyboard is sticking for some reason today.
Great post! You pretty much covered the way that I have been feeling in our healthy food journey!
Thank you, Laura, for your honesty. I struggle with the guilt of not doing everything from scratch/organic/whole foods. You have encouraged me SO much on our journey to healthier eating and I appreciate the fact that you are “real” with us. Thank you for the encouragement to know that what I’m doing is making a difference and that we all have those “forget it!” days. :-) I agree with you that we women have to stick together – we are our own worst enemy sometimes. God bless!
Thank you for your honesty. I want to clarify about my comment on the other post. I make most of our foods from scratch. I use whole wheat flour and I make yogurt occasionally. I’m adding more beans to our diet and making a more purposeful effort to have and prepare and encourage the children to eat more fruits and vegetables. That said, I don’t buy grass-fed, organic beef or chicken, I don’t grind my own flour and I don’t use raw, organic milk for my yogurt and so it feels as if it’s not good enough, even though it’s better than it used to be. I’m willing to make changes. I know we could and should eat healthier. I look forward to this series.
Thank you, thank you, thank you. I’ve made some changes in our diet over the last year but I so desire to do more. My husband is on board for finding a CSA or buying organic/free range/grass fed if we can find it at a decent price. My biggest thing is since making the changes, I’ve gained so much weight! Like 10-15 pounds! I’ve made the mistake of thinking “well, it’s healthy, so I can eat what I want of it!”. Wrong-o! I’m having to go back and readjust my mindset. Yes, it is healthier for sure, but I can’t go crazy and eat more than necessary! Thank you for the encouragement for not feeling guilty. For me, not feeling guilty that I’m not able to do this journey just like I want it, and for taking advantage of the “healthy” label. All in moderation…with some exercise thrown in for good measure! Blessings!
You have hit the nail on the head. Rather than being confident and secure in the knowledge that we are where God wants our family to be right now, I compare myself to all those around me. Instead of being thankful for where God has brought us thus far, all I see is how far we have yet to go and how many more changes I feel I should be making. The attitude of “I should be…” strips away my gratitude and replaces it with discontent and guilt which is never from God. So, my goal while enjoying this series is to pray and try to discern between what God is actually nudging me to do and what I think I should be doing. No Guilt! :-)
Great post. Even without kids and a hectic schedule, I still struggle with putting healthy whole food meals on the table 365 days a year. But I’m not going to beat myself up about it. I do what I can, when I can, and try to plan and do better in the future. And it’s nice to know I’m not alone in my Dorito fixation! lol I don’t buy them, but oh boy, if someone else does, watch out! Looking forward to the whole series.
Thanks Laura, being on this journey to healthy eating for us is just that a journey. I agree we shouldn’t make excuses to eat food that is poor in nutrition and full of bad things. Yet, we are human and our flesh often wins over the spirit. It is been happening since the Garden of Eden and the forbidden fruit. So no more guilt for 2012.
thanks so much for this post. I feel a lot of guilt for not doing better all the time, but working part time with 2 little kiddos to take care of I’ve finally had to accept the fact that for right now I will be making compromises. Afterall, what good is it to work so hard to provide healthy foods if it just leaves me stressed out and less likely to nourish their little souls with gentleness and kindness?
Laura,
I have also struggled with the guilt you mentioned. One thing that helps me is using the 80/20 rule (or 90/10 if you want), where 80% of the time our family eats healthy and the other 20% (usually a church activity or potluck, or a family birthday)it’s okay to be less healthy. This isn’t a license to go overboard but really helped alleviate the guilty feeling. It gives me permission to enjoy our small group at church without analyzing the food served. Also I stopped worrying if the kids had pizza with the youth group.
Looking forward to your series!
It’s nice to know that someone, who in my opinion has arrived, struggles. I am so excited to read your encouragement. And for the record, not one single of your recipes that we’ve tried (and there are many) do we dislike! I am so thankful that you put all of it out there to help us along the way!
Wow, thanks for sharing that. Because I do feel like I’m being ‘sized up’ by some of the choices I make.
We are on the same team, thanks for encouraging us to remember that.
Hi Laura, what ever happened to your delightful podcasts? I love those! They are so much fun to listen to and I glean so much great information. Your blog is such an encouragement to my family. Thank you!
I appreciate your honesty. One thing…I really do believe we should strive to eat healthy..but it should NOT be a burden. Sugar, honey all of these things….in moderation. And I try to always remember…Guilt comes from the enemy…conviction on the other hand is useful to changing our bad habits and becoming who we should be. ANd one final thought…my kids are adults now…and our job is to teach them to make good choices…..I let them have birthday cake…and Halloween candy growing up, and I will never give up the wonderful Christmas cookies…..but there is the key….we don’t eat like that ALL the time. You are doing a great job. Keep it up.
It is nice to hear sometimes that others do the same things. We try to eat healthy but their is still times that we have a meal that really is not very good for us. Especially around birthdays and holidays.
I figure the effort I make is still better than none!
I have only one healthy eating goal for my family this year. Half the plate should be vegetables and fruit, two meals a day at least. If I can get them to do that, everything else will work out. And the only way to get them to do it is to serve lots of variety of vegetables. At. Every. Meal. No more “oh, throw a few baby carrots on the plate with that pb&j and call it lunch.”
Laura, thank you thank you thank you!!! My family doesn’t soak either, after reading extensively the material put out by Sue Becker. Sometimes I feel like I’m the black sheep. You’ve given me some courage. :-)
Can’t wait for the series!!!
AMEN! No soaking needed! (-:
I’m sending you virtual hugs. Sometimes I feel very alone in my no-soaking stance. :-)
This was definitely an area I was feeling guilty about, also.
I grind my own organic flour from Azure, but found most things
that I soaked were gummy. I could come up with a decent sourdough
loaf suitable for a soup dinner, but nothing else that I wanted
to add to our normal menus.
I looked up the article mentioned and wish there was some more dialogue
on this topic.
http://info.breadbeckers.com/phytic-acid/
That’s the article that cinched it for me. Check this one out too! http://info.breadbeckers.com/whole-grain-goodness/
Thank you! I feel so much better – looking forward to this series.
You are an encouagement to me, Laura. Thank you. This is another post I will be following. Even though I am me and you are you (profound, isn’t it?) I have had every emotion you have experienced. I want to eat healthier…but the ‘to-do’ lists are daunting to me. Or haunting. I’m excited to give this a step-by-step try.
God bless you as you bless us!
I know what you mean. Sometimes I think the guilt I feel is far more harmful to my overall health than the “not greatest” food I’m serving.
I have never had any inkling of natural interest in cooking. I managed quite well on my own with very – VERY – simple meals. (Potato + microwave + salt + pepper, fresh fruit, you get the idea.) Now that I am married with kids, I have a deep appreciation for the work that a lot of people do in making sure their families are well and healthily fed. I’m certainly not there, but we do lots of positive things along the way.
I am incredibly grateful for my hubby who loves to cook (and is really good at it). :)
Oh thank you for this post. Five years ago we found out my son has celiacs so my life went into a crazy frieghtening food tail spin (on top of this, I was the (proud) coupon queen of my area, pay for food/ and crazy expensive food at that!). Now I read blogs like yours and find myself feeling guilty because I don’t soak my grains and think ugh one more thing I CANT. Then I read your confession and realize yes I can, just maybe not now. Thank you Laura, I love your blog for so many reasons. God bless you and your family. And keep coming up with those great GF receipes! :o0
Oh thank you! I am so excited about this. I know I struggle with guilt a lot about what my family eats, but what makes it harder to trying to get others (mainly extended family) to understand why we eat this way. This is great encouragement to keep it up.
That post and other similar ones are why I visit your blog daily. You are real and encouraging. Thank you!
Thanks for putting a smile on my face and laughter in my heart! I know many of your readers probably, like myself, probably get stuck in this mindset like myself that you have everything down and just wake up fresh every morning. DUH – so not realistic, but it’s hard for us to remember that. So THANK YOU THANK YOU for being so real (okay, now the tears are coming) with me and your readers. Everyday there are battles; food battles, spouse battles, kid battles, home, etc… and it’s so refreshing to know that I’m/we’re not alone. Thank you again for taking the time to encourage and teach us through your blog and resources. I’m excited (I think) to read your No Excuses posts ;-)
Thanks for being real with us, Laura. I sometime have to remind myself that what people post to their blogs is only one piece of the story.
Thank you so much for sharing your journey!!! We all need lots of grace!!!
I just love your blog. It’s the one I always come back to–for the recipes, the fun, and the encouragement. Thanks!
hi laura……love this post and know exactly how you feel and where you’re coming from. just came home from the grocery store today with a bag of chili cheese fritos. my son and i have been craving them since saturday!! do you think the kefir fermenting on my counter and the fact that i made homemade bread earlier today make up for it? maybe a little? as hard as we all try, it’s nice to know that even you cave in sometimes!!
I can’t wait to read this series! Our family has been on a healthy eating journey for the last 4 years. It has been fun, overwhelming, daunting, challenging, educational, and a whole gamut of other adjectives I just can’t come up with right now.
We live by the 80/20 rule. If I cook the ‘good stuff’ at home, from scratch, with love 80% of the time, I am not going to sweat the 20% when we are at other peoples homes and they feed us Doritos (grin) or we eat out at a restaurant. It works for us.
I look forward to getting some much needed encouragement and fresh ideas from you!!
Thanks for such a great post. My craving for diet pop drives me nuts some times. I do give in as a special treat. Glad to know I’m not alone in my weakness. :)
I haven’t read the other replies yet, but I have to say…this may be my favorite post of yours yet (and that’s saying a lot!). Thank you for being so honest and open and capturing exactly how I feel much of the time. It really does help remove the guilt I sometimes feel when I don’t do as much in the way of healthy eating as some of my friends, because, honestly, to some of my friends and family I am a healthy-cooking/food-prep marvel! LOL! It’s all in the perspective, and the important thing is to look at the big picture and keep on going. Thanks so much for a funny, honest and very encouraging post! ((HUGS))
Great post! We’ve been on this healthy journey for about 20 years. What I’ve loved and hated most about it is trying new things and learning what works and doesn’t for our family. I say “hated” b/c at times it’s been expensive. I actually bought a soy milk maker about 10 years ago. Ugh!!! But you know, isn’t that what life is all about? It’s a journey, a marathon not a sprint. We walk, we learn, we fall, we get up. The only time we’ve failed is if we fail and didn’t get up.
Looking so forward to this series. Learning and encouraging together! I like that!
Loved this post!! I agree, we are all on the same team. It’s so nice to be able to come to this blog and not be judged or feel like we have to compare one another. We are all in different points in our lives. Guilt is a thing I think all moms struggle with. Thank you so much for this series!!
So just before I read this I was feeling guilty .I told my husband that I did feel guilty making these bob’s red mill gluten free corn bread muffins, as I noticed the ingredient xanathan gum.I know they use petrol chemicals to processes this stuff, (it is used to make sticky dough)also the corn in the package was not organic and I know the corn from the USA is GMO.But also felt guilt if I threw all this food away, I had just mixed in all organic milk , eggs, butter…we are a family that needs to live my their means.So all that said, I decided to use the muffins, eat them and never buy the mix again.I was feeling lazy to make them from scratch, but I also decided to go easy on myself as I teach classes and run a busy house, I am allowed to slip up.We will make ourselves sick if we do the whole guilt thing.I can sit here and tell myself 100 stories on why I should feel less than I am, but I choose not too.Thank -you for your post, it was the right time for me to read it.I am not alone in my dilemma.There is comfort there:)All part of being a mom.Put away your bags ladies, we are NOT going on that guilt trip!!!!!
Thanks so much for this perspective. This year, I’ve had to make peace with the fact that neither the budget or my time allow me to do everything for my family the ideal way. And what I see so many do who are new to traditional foods or healthy eating is be motivated out of fear and guilt. Fear that if I don’t eliminate everything they say is dangerous, or if I don’t find a way to source the perfect foods, some terrible illness or disease will overtake my family. Or guilt that they aren’t able to jump in and make everything perfectly wholesome for their family.
I think what we miss is that living in fear and guilt, over ANYTHING, robs us of the joy and peace that Christ came to give us. So while we may be providing great nutrition, are we providing a Christ-like example?
Just the thoughts from one mom who’s working her way through all this too, trying to faithfully fulfill my role to provide nourishment for my family, and ultimately honor my God in the way that I do it. One step at a time…right?
I heart you Laura :) xo
Love this post, well said. I am thankful to know that there are other women out there who like me desire to eat healthy, but struggle with expense and the fact that there kids don’t like the healthy versions of some of their favorite foods. Looking forward to seeing suggestions that will inspire and challenge me. Thanks