Heavenly Homemakers

I have been so naughty this week. You never knew I had this in me.

The back story:

When Matt and I first started dating in college, then became engaged, we spent quite a bit of time at the Miller’s house. They probably didn’t even know how much they were mentoring us toward beginning a healthy marriage, but they were.

On our wedding day, we were so pleasantly surprised to see that they’d driven all the way from York, NE to little ol’ Isabel, KS to honor us. How sweet are they??

Not as sweet as you think.

No, but really. They are very sweet. It’s just this:

I didn’t dare put my honeymoon suitcase in our get-away car because as much as I love all the guys involved in our wedding, I wasn’t sure I trusted them with my “special things” I’d packed for our wedding night and…etc. So instead of putting it in the car, I put my suitcase in the women’s restroom where it would be safe. Uh-huh.

After the ceremony, the picture taking, the cake eating, and the wheat throwing (I’m from Kansas. I didn’t want rice. I wanted wheat.) – I grabbed my suitcase and away we went.

Well. When we got to our hotel, I opened my suitcase and what did I find?

Every one of my socks was full of wheat. What’s more? Every single article of clothing – even my “special things” – were all tied together so that when I pulled out one piece, I just kept pulling. And pulling. And pulling. (Like a clown. On her honeymoon).

It took me completely by surprise and I could not for the life of me figure out who to blame. When we got back home, I started accusing everyone I could think of. First I pointed to my cousin Dana, who had been a bridesmaid. “It was you!! You and Rebecca I bet! When did you do it??”

Nope, innocent.

I confronted the rest of my bridesmaids, other friends who were there, my sisters-in-law, my aunts. No one knew a thing about it. Grandma?!? Nope. It wasn’t Grandma.

This remained a mystery for years.

Then came the day so many years later when I was telling the story to a group of friends in which one very guilty lady named GAIL MILLER sat sheepishly in the back, trying to contain her laughter. “Ah-ha!!!” I screamed when I saw her face. “It was YOU!!!!” I could not believe it. No way. Not Gail Miller!

Yes, Gail Miller – along with an accomplice who now lives in another state but should probably watch her back. (You’re next, Robbie.)

We’ve gotten many a laugh out of this through the years. Gail continues to be a fantastic role model, friend, and mentor to me. But here’s the part where I tell you what I did last week and I am so very proud and not the least bit ashamed of myself.

Gail and her hubs went out of town for a couple of weeks. While they were gone, they employed my husband to finish working on the walls and a closet in their basement. They gave him a key, and I believe their exact words were, “Go in and out as needed. Make yourself at home.”

Well if you say so.

What started out as me (the sweet and supportive wife) telling Matt, “I want to run over there with you some day to see what you’re working on” turned into, “Oh my goodness, I can’t believe I didn’t think of this before!! I am soooo going with you some day while they are gone and I am going to tie a bunch of Gail’s stuff together for her to find when she gets home!! I will fill her socks with wheat! Revenge time!!!” at which point I’m sure Matt had never been so thankful for and proud of his meek and godly wife.

When the day came, I couldn’t bring myself to go in search of her “special things” drawer. (Because I’m nicer than Gail.) So I stayed in the kitchen and dining area. Not to worry, there was plenty of tying to be done so there’d be no doubt I’d been by for a visit. It was ever so much fun.

Now let the fuzzy selfie slide show begin (because it’s much harder than you think to tie things together and take pictures of yourself at the same time):

First, when she opened her potholder/tea towel drawer it looked like this as normal:

But when she pulled out a tea towel, she found this:

My arms weren’t long enough to show you all 7 towels tied together (cue evil laugh here). But here’s a FB picture of Gail’s daughter Lynn that made me laugh for five minutes:

This next pic is the fuzziest of all, but my favorite of the prank. Gail has a drawer full of decorative flags she hangs outside as the seasons change. I tied them all, which spread across the entire room.

Oh look. She found them.

Next I found that tying all the chairs together at the bar was a fantastic idea. “Can I get you a chair? How about three chairs?”

All of her shopping bags were hanging together in the entry way. Assuming she will need all of them for a single shopping trip, I tied the handles all together. Just trying to help.

Lastly, I found all her jackets. Just one last special surprise for the fall when it gets chilly.

It was 45 minutes of pure silliness, of which Matt was finishing his work in the basement and shaking his head at me (while silently cheering me on, I’m sure). Malachi was there too, laughing that his old mom could possibly be so cool and fun. (Right, Malachi? That’s what you were thinking.)

Then, of course, I had to wait many days in silence before Gail and Ray got home to discover what I’d been up to. Finally, the Facebook message appeared:

“Took me a little while, but I finally put it together. It has taken a few years for some due payback, but you finally got me. Good one, Laura Coppinger. Good one!”

to which I answered,

“Welcome home, Gail!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But what are you even talking about? Payback? Payback for what? I’m just sitting here reading my Bible…”

I guess you all know now that if you play a prank on me, I will most certainly get my revenge – even if it does take 22 years. Watch yourself.

P.S. Love you, Gail Miller!!!