Heavenly Homemakers

Encouraging women in homemaking, healthy eating and parenting

Chatting With Lisa Whelchel (about raising teenagers)

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Yesterday I shared what Lisa Whelchel had to say about raising little ones. Her kids are all grown up now (her youngest just graduated), and because I really wanted to know for my own sake (and for yours too of course), I decided to ask her about raising teens.

Me:

Our oldest son just became a teenager. We’re enjoying this “new season of life” as we learn to raise a teen and also feel like we have no idea what we’re doing (much like we didn’t have any idea what we were doing when we started raising babies!). You had three teenagers all at once. What were some of the joys and challenges you faced as you raised your teens, and what advice might you give to parents on this journey?

Lisa:

As your kids become teenagers, you really have to start loosening the grip you have…you can’t control them like you did with they were seven and eight years old. It’s natural for them to try to separate themselves from you and experiment with life as they figure out who they are. 

This is hard because as a parent, you see the bigger picture and you want to protect them from heartache. But over-protecting can stifle what they are learning. You need to be open handed. You need to tell yourself, “I have been the parent, I have taught them well. Now I need to trust God to let them use what I’ve taught them as they grow into adulthood.”

Me: 

Tell me a little bit about your kids now that they are young adults. What are some of the great qualities you see in them – what do you love about your kids? 

Lisa:

I’ll start with my youngest, Clancy. I really just enjoy talking to her. We love to have coffee together in the mornings and just talk. She’s just wonderful and I just enjoy her so much.

Haven is my older daughter. I admire her so much. She is amazing at seeing the big picture. She plans margins in her life, which shows wisdom beyond her years. 

Tucker was the hardest to raise, yet he’s who I’ve learned the most from and I respect him so much. He’s honest about everything and not a pretender. I had a hard time with that as he was growing up because that could sometimes come across in him as “not being a good boy”. I’m glad I didn’t snuff that out of him. He’s creative…not a rule follower.

I love how although I am the parent, I am able to learn so much from my kids.

Laura’s (very few) follow-up thoughts (as I have only been the parent of a teenager for approximately 39 days):

I am really beginning to understand the idea of “loosening the grip” as I’m watching Asa naturally work his way toward more independence. Matt and I feel like our biggest job now is to walk alongside and guide him as he grows into adulthood. 

That, and pray for God to guide us as we walk a path we’ve never walked before. ;)

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Chatting With Lisa Whelchel (about raising little ones)

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I had the blessed opportunity to spend exactly 15 minutes on the phone with Lisa Whelchel on Thursday morning. It was an honor for me and here’s why:  Lisa’s book, Creative Correction, was life changing for me as a mama. 

I first read it when my kids were all little bitty guys. Reading Creative Correction helped me understand that my job was NOT to raise good kids just so that I could feel good about being a good mom. Somehow I hadn’t figured that out yet. I was very focused at that time on making sure my kids obeyed and acted the way they should (not a bad thing to focus on) BUT my motive was simply that I wanted to look good and not be embarrassed as a mother. Good kids meant I was a good mom, right?

creative

Creative Correction opened my eyes to the fact that my goal as I was raising my boys was to teach them about Jesus. To instill Godly behavior in them and a heart for Christ. To teach them scripture and a love for the Lord. It had nothing to do with ME at all. 

I was so grateful for the chance to tell Lisa “thank you” phone to phone. It was truly a delight.

Over the course of the next few days, I’ll be sharing parts of my conversation with Lisa. I appreciate all the great question ideas you sent my way and well…I have to apologize because while they were on my list…fifteen minutes goes very quickly and I barely had a chance to get through many questions at all. Hopefully you’ll all enjoy hearing what she had to say, even if it didn’t answer your specific question! Here’s the first question I asked Lisa…

Me:

“You had three babies in three years…many of my readers are in that season of life right now trying to juggle life with lots of little ones. What encouragement can you offer moms with little ones?”

Lisa:

“I’d say do as little as possible outside of being a mom. Don’t put your kids in a bunch of activities. Don’t be involved yourself in a lot of extra activities. You don’t need to try to lead a Bible study…don’t even go to a bunch of Bible studies if getting there takes too much out of you. There are so many good things to do, but you may need to give up even some of the good things you’re interested in doing so that you can do what you need to do for your family. Raising little ones takes a lot out of us and if we give a lot of our energy to outside things, we don’t have anything left for our family. This is a short season in life…later you can do more of the other things you feel are important, but right now raising your little ones is the most important. Spend time putting a bunch of meals in the freezer once a month so that all you have to do is heat something up for dinner and not spend time putting gourmet food on the table every night. Do everything you can to eliminate what is not necessary so that you can focus your energy on what is necessary.”

Laura’s follow-up thoughts:

I remember struggling to get out of the door by 9:30 for a Ladies’ Bible Study each Thursday morning when my boys were tiny (nursing, in diapers, potty training…). I don’t remember a thing about what we studied during those years. What I do remember is feeling like I wanted to CRY every single Thursday by the time I finally got there (late) and fought my kids to get into the nursery. Don’t even get me started on how much it wrecked their nap schedule and threw the entire day off and created a lot of grouchiness (the kids were usually grouchy too).

Why did I keep doing it week after week? Because it was “a good thing to do”. Because I felt like I should. Because I didn’t want to let the other ladies down. I don’t completely regret going…I formed some wonderful relationships with many of the older women from church. However, could I have cut myself some slack during those years? Could I have instead worked in some quiet Bible study at home by myself during their morning nap? Might I have saved my children from having a worn out, grumpy mom every Thursday afternoon and Friday morning (because I would then be behind on other things.)? Maybe so.

I think it’s good to look at the reasons we do what we’re doing, no matter what season in life we are in. What IS best for my family right now? What do I need to eliminate so that I can be the best wife and mom I can be? I’d love for you all to share your thoughts on this topic!

P.S. You know I agreed with Lisa’s statement about putting a bunch of food in the freezer for easy warm up!! :)

Coming up next:  Lisa talks about raising teenagers and having young adult children

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Becoming a Better Help Meet: Remind Yourself!

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help meet

Today I just want to share a simple little thing I do to remind myself all day that I think my husband is awesome!

This all came about rather innocently. I didn’t intentionally create this little exercise so that I could remind myself of how much I love Matt. It just happened, and then I realized how cool it was. It’s profound…are you ready?! 

I set one of my computer passwords (one that I use frequently) to say something great about Matt.  I was feeling giddy one day, and I needed to set a new password…and so just like I was in junior high writing “I LOVE MATT” on the side of my notebook between classes, I set my password to say it.

(“I LOVE MATT” isn’t the password, by the way. What, do you think I’d just tell all of you one of my passwords?)

(Or maybe it IS the password and I’m just telling you it isn’t just to throw you off.)

(Wow, I just forever keep you hopping, don’t I?)

But don’t you remember those feelings you felt back when you and your husband were dating and you couldn’t stop thinking about him and you wanted to carve your initials together into a tree? And tell all your friends about how great he was? And write his name on stuff?

Somehow life takes over and reality sets in and we as a couple become comfortable and not so giddy anymore. That’s mostly okay. We don’t really have time to sit around and sigh and daydream.

But having my password set to remind me all day long that I LOVE MATT (or something else, or not), has been so super neat. Like, totally.  (That would be me reverting back to junior high lingo.)

Typing in the words reminds me several times a day of how much I love my  husband. And in the middle of a very busy life full of activity and just…busyness…those reminders are a valuable treasure.

So, just a suggestion:  Set up a password or two to say something great about your relationship with your husband. You’ll appreciate the loving reminders!

LAURA AND MATT FOREVER XOXOXO

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You Can’t Drown A Bug

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Who knew that looking at a big ugly bug crawling around in the bottom of my kitchen sink would give me pause for reflection into my own life?

It was a bug. What was there to think about? Normally, I don’t have to think long when I see a bug of any kind. The question usually is as simple as, “Where is the nearest shoe?” Whereas snakes and birds may have me running the other way…bugs don’t tend to scare me very much. They’re creepy and they get on my nerves, but squishing a bug doesn’t usually faze me. Well, except for the crunch. Ick. I’m not a big fan of the crunch. 

Anyway, there it was scratching its eight or twelve or thirty little bug legs (I didn’t stop to count), trying with all of its might to find a way out of the bottom of my slippery, wet sink. While the question may have normally been, “Where is the nearest shoe?” I wasn’t too keen on taking off my flip-flop and putting it into the bottom of the sink to squish the bug. 

Therefore, I resorted to Plan B, which of course in the case of an ugly bug in the sink means:  Run Water Over the Bug. 

If you’ve ever run water over a bug, you will learn that a bug is quite unusually determined. It will put all of its eight or twelve or thirty legs to work at the same time, scratching as frantically as it can in the opposite direction of the flow of the water. And about the time you think you have surely captured the bug in the flow of the water and killed it, you will turn off the water and see that the bug was hardly fazed at all. It will, in fact, blink and sputter a time or two, then begin to crawl around again as if it only just experienced a lovely refreshing shower…not a near death experience.

You will then resort to Plan C which is to turn on the steaming hot water to kill the bug. Again, the bug will only act as if it just experienced a delightful dip in the hot tub at a spa resort. 

You can try scooping the bug up into a cup of water. It will go for a swim. You can try pushing it down the drain. It will come up for more like it just went down a cool water slide.

Nothing you can do will drown the bug.

There is only one thing you can do to get rid of the bug. You have to squish its guts out.

Lovely to think about isn’t it?

The moral of this story is a simple one:  If you have sin or strife in your life, you can not merely “run water over it” and try to get rid of it. Taking the easy way out will not result in cleaning up your life. Running water over it will only temporarily fix the issue, making it appear as if it is gone…but it will quickly resurface itself the moment the water is turned off.

If you have a sin in your life, you have to squish it. You have to hear the crunch. It will likely hurt. 

But then it will be gone. And you can clean up the guts that are splattered all over the place then fill that void in your life with something healthy, whole and good.

Yes indeed. Who knew you could learn so much from a bug?

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Gratituesday: The Date

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gratituesday

Everyone else had plans.

Malachi got to go to a birthday party. Asa and Justus got to go to yet a different birthday party. Matt was working.

That left just Elias and Mama. When does that ever happen? Mama with just one boy for an entire evening?

And so, I told Elias that he should use this opportunity to take me on a date. You should have seen his cute little eight year old eyes! And eye brows. And grin. You would have thought I had offered to buy him a toy store.

He didn’t say a word. He just wore that cute little joyful face and he just nodded. I could see the wheels turning inside his head, “Where should I take Mama? What should we do?” (And yes, he really does call me Mama. The older boys, and even Malachi have started calling me just “Mom” now…but Elias still says Mama. Yum, I love it.)

He decided to take me out to the China Buffet. We ate. We went back for seconds. We picked out desserts. We talked about silly stuff and serious stuff. We talked about what he might like to be when he grows up. We got tickled because we had the EXACT same fortune inside our fortune cookies. 

Daddy had slipped him a little cash to pay for our date, so Elias covered the bill. It was SO precious!!

I am going to work hard to make this happen with each boy as often as I can. Alone time with the kids is hard to come by. We’ll have to be intentional. But now that Elias has had his turn, the other boys are asking constantly about when it will be their turn to take me out. Since they’re so motivated, I think it will be easier to make it happen.

And hopefully, Matt will occasionally still be able to wrestle down the competition and take a turn himself. :)

What are you thankful for this Gratituesday? Write about it on your blog, then come link up with us here. If you don’t have a blog, be sure to leave a comment letting us know what you’re grateful for!

If you are linking up a blog post for Gratituesday,
please copy and paste the following sentence into your post! Thanks!

Join us for Gratituesday at Heavenly Homemakers!

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Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Curriculum Kit…It’s Finished!! It’s Finished!!!

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If it’s loud in here, that’s because I’m running around the house with my arms waving in the air screaming:

It’s done, it’s done, it’s done, it’s done, it’s donnnnne!!!!!!!!!

After two years of planning and writing, fixing, changing, editing, dreaming, praying, crying and praying some more…it’s done!!! It’s DONE!!!

I’d like to take a moment to thank all the little people.

Seriously. The little people. My kids.  The ones who were the inspiration for all of this back in the day when they didn’t eat so much food. Back when they were my preschool servants. They are now a little bigger and I can’t thank them enough for eagerly helping me add ideas, create projects and take pictures for the tutorials included in the kit. And also for being patient with me during the past few weeks when they would ask me questions and I would look up from the computer with glassy eyes. God bless you boys for putting up with me.

And of course, you know how much I want to thank my husband. He is the reason this kit is finished, the reason it exists at all. My husband is my rock, the one who points me toward The Rock. He spent hours editing, offering suggestions and in general putting up with a wife who was distracted and talked in her sleep, as I spouted off craft ideas all beginning with the letter Ii. Seriously, this endeavor had me talking in my sleep. About the alphabet. To my husband. And he was kind enough not to make fun of me. I’m keeping him forever.

I also MUST thank Lenetta, who had the grueling task of editing the entire kit when it was formatted all crazy like. She has a gift for making the written word shine on paper and screen. And Char…for all your help in the past few days as we got everything finished up, I thank you.

And now…without further ado…Learn Your Letters, Learn To Serve Complete Curriculum Kit!

learnyourletters

Teach your child to serve…one letter at a time! This 240+ kit includes thorough lesson plans, games, crafts, recipes, memory verses, Bible story suggestions, vocabulary stimulation and discussion, play, books to read and so much more…all while encouraging service to God!

Each letter you study includes suggestions for service, such as “Take a new Bible to B__________” on Bb week, “Make soup for someone who is sick on Ss week, and “Deliver flowers to F_______________” on Ff week. Your child will make gifts or food, offer help and learn to think of others. As a family you can delight in praying together about who you would like to serve and what form of service you would like to offer! 

This curriculum kit can be used as a supplement to what you are currently doing to teach your child preschool basics…or it can be used all on its own as a complete early learners curriculum tool.  It is absolutely not just for home schoolers.  Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve is for any family who would enjoy learning and serving together with little ones.  In addition, Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Curriculum Kit may be purchased for use in a Sunday School Classroom or Preschool Classroom.

To get a feel for what this kit is like, help yourself to this free sample lesson!

What Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve includes:

  • 159 Page Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Book of ideas, instructions, recipes, tutorials and service planners  (the majority of this book can be left paperless, unless you choose to print it and bind it)
  • Alphabet Practice Packet (26 pages of printable letter writing practice)
  • Alphabet Project Packet (printable projects that go along with various lessons)
  • Memory Verse Packet (26 printable memory verses to decorate and place on the wall or in a binder)
  • Parent Planning Packet (planning pages, teaching suggestions, scheduling ideas)

Feel free to email me with questions!

I pray that you will be as blessed as our family has been as you learn and serve together!

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 $45.00

Add to Cart

After your purchase, you will be sent an email with your download links!

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A Recipe, A Giveaway, and Oh Yeah – A Menu Plan

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Welcome to my very long post. I’m not sure if this is called multitasking…or if it’s called the best way to overwhelm your audience. Maybe it’s simply called Laura is trying to play catch-up. Yes, apparently I’m trying to kill three birds with one…post.

Disclaimer:  No birds were harmed during the writing of this post.

The Menu Plan:

Sunday, July 11
Oatmeal, pears
Cheddar ranch burgers, corn on the cob (while we watch the World Cup finals!)
Bean and rice bowls, fresh pineapple

Monday, July 12
Whole wheat waffles
Grilled cheese sandwiches, tomato soup, carrot sticks
Venison roast, potatoes, carrots, gravy

Tuesday, July 13
Scrambled eggs, oranges
Homemade pizza, grapes
Crunchy ranch chicken, stir fried rice and veggies

Wednesday, July 14
French toast, blueberries
Tuna on tomatoes, crispy cheese crackers, fruit kefir smoothies
Chicken fried steak strips, mashed potatoes, gravy, green beans

Thursday, July 15
Mini apple pies, cheese
Corn dogs, watermelon
Egg/turkey sausage/hashbrown casserole, orange muffins

Friday, July 16
Peanut butter honey toast, applesauce
Popcorn chicken, green beans
Sloppy cornbread, strawberry-peach slushies, peas

Saturday, July 17
Funnel cakes
Leftovers
Tacos

The Recipe

Back when I threw out the question about grills, Christy left a comment about how she makes Apple Crisp on the grill. I asked her for the recipe…and she kindly sent it to me. Doesn’t this sound SO good?

Apple Crisp on the Grill

In a bowl, mix together the apples, cinnamon and flour. Coat well, and add apple juice and sugar/or honey. Mix in with apples and fold in until mixture is combined. Place in an old metal bread pan or two disposable pie plates.

5-6 apples diced w/skins on (Adds color and extra vitamins)
2 T Sugar or honey
2 T. Apple juice
1 t . cinnamon
2T. whole wheat or AP flour

Topping:
1/4 c. whole wheat flour
1/4 c. rolled oats
1/4 c. butter (cold is good)
3 T . Brown Sugar
1 t. cinnamon

Mix topping ingredients together, and crumble evenly to the top of the apples! Wrap tightly in foil.

Christy says, “I put the crisp on the BBQ on low, at the same time as I I put on my potatoes, followed by the vegetables, then the burgers! When our main course is ready I turn off the heat, and let the crisp finish, and let the juices get nice and thick. The smell is amazing and brings a touch of fall to the air” :)

The Giveaway:

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I was sent TWO coupons for a FREE package of Original Brat Hans Sausages. My grocery stores don’t carry these sausages (I think you can find them at Whole Foods), so they said I could give them away to two of you!! If you’re interested in these Brat Hans Gourmet Chicken Sausages with No Nitrates, No Nitrites, No MSG, No Fillers, No Antibiotics, No Added Hormones, No Preservatives…leave a comment on this post! I’ll draw two random winners at the end of the week.

You may also be interested to know that I will be drawing the winner for Learn Your Letters, Learn To Serve Curriculum Kit tonight…and you know what comes after that!!!

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Freezer Cooking For July Wrap up

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Well now, here we are…many, many days after my original post telling you about how I was going to cook and bake to get ahead in the kitchen for July. I’m sure you were waiting on pins and needles to hear how it all went.

Want to know my husband’s reaction when he saw my list? First let me say that usually when Matt sees my cooking-ahead lists, he gets excited about the food in his future. This time however, since I was working so frantically on finishing the curriculum kit, he looked at the list, then he looked gently up at me (beautiful, haggard me…with hair drooping pitifully into my face and contact lenses strewn about the table) and said not so confidently, “Really?”

I smiled weakly and said uh-huh, because we still needed to eat and occasionally I wanted to take a break from the computer, you know? What better therapy after being on the computer for hours than being able to go into the kitchen to cook? 

Lest you look at these pictures and think I am really cool for getting all this done…do be made well aware that all of this took me no less than NINE days. I did not do it all at once. I did not do it very quickly. I just cooked a little extra each day when I was making our regular meals. And now, we have some lovely convenience food in the freezer. 

And let’s all do appreciate the fact that having these lovely cooking breaks in between writing did much for my sanity. 

Oh, and the children and husband also appreciated my sanity being provided with something to eat.

Take note that I did not get everything done on my list. However, I added a few things to the list so it all balances out.

I cooked a whole chicken, made broth from the bones and the whole nine yards, but I must have forgotten to take a picture. Forgive the lack of poultry pictured below.

july_freezer_cooking

I made some butterscotch bars for a reunion. And for breakfast that day, I made applesauce bread into applesauce cake. Note to self:  applesauce bread makes good applesauce cake and a fun breakfast treat. Just spread bread batter into a buttered 9×13 inch pan and bake at 350° for 35 minutes or so.

july_freezer_cooking_2

I mixed up chocolate chip cookies, but instead of baking them, I just froze scoops of dough. Now, I can bake a few at a time as needed. Check out the red stained parchment paper. That was from freezing strawberries last month. I like to reuse parchment paper. The kids thought the cookies were bleeding, but that’s just because they’re boys and they like to think of gross things.

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I made a batch of breakfast cookies one night, froze half of them and we ate the other half for breakfast the next day. Sorry about the poor quality of that picture. That happens late at night.

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One day I got a whole bunch accomplished:  frozen chicken fried steak strips, tortillas for burritos…

freezer_cooking_three

There are the finished bean/cheese burritos. With tortillas leftover. I love it when tortillas are leftover.

freezer_cooking_four

Another day I made a batch of buns. 
Here’s your chance to say:  “Wow Laura…nice buns.”

freezer_cooking_five

I made ice cream one evening and we ate it for dinner. That’s it. We just had ice cream for dinner. But it was this recipe and I felt like we were having quite a nutritious dinner. Minus any vegetables. It’s okay, we had green beans for breakfast Wednesday so that made up for it. We’re weird, aren’t we?

freezer_cooking_seven

Somewhere in there I made a jar of peanut butter.

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These weren’t on the list, but I was making lasagna casserole one night, so instead of one, I made three. Didn’t take any longer and now I have two in the freezer!

Now, as we approach August…I’ll probably just continue to make and freeze food as much as I can. August is very full with school starting, the garden exploding with food to preserve and soccer season begins again.

Bring on the freezer food.

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The Garden

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Several of you have requested to see how our garden is growing this year. Therefore, I braved the millions of mosquitoes and took several shots of our glorious soil with green things growing out of it.

I can take absolutely NO credit this year for how the garden looks. Matt has worked VERY hard and keeping the weeds under control and everything looks so, so pretty.

I basically started on one end of the house and went all the way around the back to the other side taking pictures. Yes, we have more than one garden spot. If it has the capability to grow things (and it isn’t an area used regularly to kick soccer balls), it has been tilled and it shall bear fruit. Well, vegetables as the case may be.

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Here we have several tomato plants and some pepper plants. 
Looks like the beginnings of salsa, wouldn’t you think?

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Ah, more tomato plants. Yes, there will be many tomatoes. We are not afraid.

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Ooh, the first fruits. Vegetables. Wait. Tomatoes are a fruit. 

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We planted the corn in two stages so that it would be ready at two different times. 
The first round is just a bit taller than me. We’re so proud.

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Here are more pepper plants growing in the raised garden bed Matt made last year. 
Our yard is really not crooked. I just took a crooked picture.

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Here’s our little garden of potatoes. See all the blossoms? 
That means there are lots of french fries growing underground.

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Beside the potato plot grows our beloved peach tree. 
There are only a few peaches on it, so this year we will be mooching peaches off of others if possible. 
The tree sure looks pretty though.

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And last but not least, the green beans. Four long rows of green beans. And look:

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I picked a whole bowlful on Tuesday!! 
When I steamed some that night, I thought perhaps I was in  heaven. 

And then we may or may not have steamed more of them for breakfast this morning. Who could resist?

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