Let’s call a spade a spade. I am long overdue to own my sin of pride. That is, after all, what my “need to please” is. It’s pride. I care too much about what people think. I want people to be happy with me. My focus has been on self.
Much of this hasn’t been intentional, so if I wanted, I could (proudly) give myself the out on this one and say that I didn’t mean to do it. I have been trying to lead a Godly life and to glorify Him. I’ve been working my tail off to do this, if you want to know the truth. I’ve sacrificed much to please God – so that He and others will be happy with me.
I would also like to blame this issue on my parents, the church, my personality, and the pressure of expectations I found myself under. But in short, that’s just stupid. And it is the opposite of humility.
I need to admit to you right at this moment as I am typing this, I am being attacked by the sin of pride. Might some of you think I am great because I’ve shared this? Yes! You’ll be thinking, wow this is so well written. Laura, you’re so great! (Pride.) Or on the other hand, some of you might be completely unimpressed with what I’ve written so suddenly I begin to worry that you won’t think this article is good enough. This is also pride, cleverly disguised as humility. It is me thinking of self. Caring what you think in the midst of my raw confession.
Pride has been a part of me since before I can remember. Yes, I know, it’s a sin that grabs many of us. I’ve been aware of this fight for quite some time. But I was too proud to share, and much too afraid to let it go.
Laura: Stop worrying about what people think. If God puts something on your heart, share it. Do it. In the name of Jesus. If it blesses others, God be praised. The end.
I am finding that much of what I do is with a heart of pride lurking in the background. Here’s what God is teaching me: I don’t have to necessarily change what I do (except for the parts I do need to change.) I just need to change how I do them. The reasons I do them. The heart behind them.
Let go of pride.
To let go of a sin is painful. Somehow, it has become a part of us, so tearing it away is like ripping off a scar that has been a part of our skin for a few decades. It hurts and it’s not fun. In fact, often it seems easier and less painful to just let the sin continue to be a part of us so that we don’t have to go through the work of letting it go.
Letting it go.
The irony of letting go of my pride is that I’ve been a little too proud to do that.
But the longer I’ve held on to it, the more tightly I squeeze the fingers of wanting to please people so that they will be happy with me, the more anxious I have become.
It is time to surrender.
Give it up. The only One I need to please is God. And the way to please God is through humility, kindness, and wholehearted love. Relying on His power, experiencing His goodness, experiencing the riches that come into our lives by being a part of His Kingdom purposes.
Only when I am on my knees in true humility can I be lifted up to experience the power of God at work in my life.