Heavenly Homemakers

Encouraging women in homemaking, healthy eating and parenting

Gratituesday: Changed

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gratituesday

It was the longest I’d ever been apart from one of my children. 

Asa just got home after being away church camp for two entire weeks. Two weeks is a long time. I felt like my right arm was missing. I was so, so happy for him to be at camp, but I missed him so much at times I could hardly breathe.

Can you tell that he is my firstborn? The one who has to “break me in” to new things? This must be part of the loosening the grip thing, huh?

After he’d been gone for 13 days and the time was coming for us to pick him up soon, I emailed my friend to say, “Will it embarrass him too much if I hug him for a solid five minutes and smell his hair and cry when we pick him up at camp tomorrow?” (I was kidding, I think.) 

And then I shared my fear. My fear that his being away and working toward independence during these past two weeks would have changed everything. That he would come home and nothing would ever be the same again.

I don’t know why I was afraid. But I was. Change is never easy. I don’t like change.

Asa did come home changed. His eyes are different. His smile is different. It was as if we had dropped off a boy and two weeks later, we picked up a young man.

With tears in his eyes, he told us how being at camp had changed him. How spending one on one time with God each morning had helped him to grow spiritually. How he’d taken part in leading songs around the camp fire. How he’d led the entire group of campers in a devotional one morning. 

For the record, he did let me hug him in front of his friends at camp when we arrived. Twice. He didn’t seem to mind. (I did, however, refrain from sobbing into his hair, in case you were wondering.)

My boy is growing up. And I like it. 

Maybe change isn’t always so bad.

What are you thankful for this Gratituesday? Write about it on your blog, then come link up with us here. If you don’t have a blog, be sure to leave a comment letting us know what you’re grateful for!

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Homeschool Hubbub: Our Five Year Old

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I thought I’d take a little time to share with you some of the things we’re doing for school this year with each of our boys. We’re working hard around here, gearing up for a new school year. I figure I need to organize my thoughts and plans anyway…I may as well type them out here and bore you with all the details. Or excite you with the possibilities. Or a little bit of both. ;)

I’ll start with Malachi, our littlest guy who will officially begin kindergarten this year. Of all my boys, he’s the one I’ve done the least “formal schooling” with because there simply hasn’t been time. (Or I haven’t made the time.)  Want to know a little secret? It doesn’t matter. He does not appear to be suffering any damage from the fact that I was rarely able to sit down and talk about colors and shapes with him. He has somehow learned many of these lessons with or without me as he’s hung out with his brothers while they were learning.

malachi_cowboy_costume

And yet, I feel that it is important for me to begin to work with Malachi one-on-one for a little bit each day now that he is showing interest in learning to read and do math. In fact, he began to show so much interest in reading early in the summer that I pulled out my very favorite book and started teaching him to read!! Three cheers for getting a head start on the school year with Malachi!! We’ve started going through Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons and Malachi is SO eager and doing SO well, that we’re already on Lesson 48! I’m so thankful that reading seems to be coming easily for him….and can I just give a big shout out for Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons?! 

read

This is the book I’ve used to teach all four of my boys to read and I just LOVE it. It doesn’t work for everyone, but somehow it has worked for all of our children. It’s simple, the lessons take just a few minutes to work through, and they are so easy for the parent to guide the child toward reading. The child usually sees success within the first few lessons as they learn to put simple words together. Confidence grows because suddenly they have figured out how to put letter sounds together to make a word!! Oooh, I love those light bulb moments! 

Once we work our way through Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons, I’ll pull out our collection of Bob Books for him to work through.

For math, I’m going to try going through the first Miquon Math book with him. I’ve loved the Miquon Math books for the early grades, simply because they teach math in a way that makes sense. It may appear to be a little bit backward compared to they way we normally see math taught…but it helps the child understand the concepts. I love it.

Beyond reading and math…I’ll be reading some great read-alouds to Malachi and doing some phonics lessons using Explode the Code books.

AND…we’re very excited because we’ll be using Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve with Malachi (and the whole family) as we pick someone to serve each week, working our way through the alphabet. I’ll be buying Malachi a little notebook so that we can journal about who we serve and what we did. We’ll also be working through the memory verses in the kit and doing various other activities mentioned. I’m so excited to revisit this, since the last time we did something this thorough with our alphabet service was when Justus was three. Justus is ten now. Wow. :)

That about wraps up Malachi’s school year plans. Stay tuned to hear what Elias, Justus and Asa will be working on. And while I’m at it, I may as well “type out loud” as I figure out a schedule for this year. Because somehow, we will get it all done. Or not. Or whatever. ;)

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Chatting With Lisa Whelchel (about marriage)

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I’ve read Lisa’s ideas about parenting…I’ve read her thoughts on friendship…but I’ve never read her insights on marriage. And so I asked…

Me:

I’m currently writing a series on my blog encouraging wives in their journey as a help meet to their husbands. What is something practical you’ve done to help your husband be a better father, husband, man of God?

Lisa:

Well, can I share something with you that I wish I would have done better and understood earlier? 

It’s about balance. I’d read all the books about being a great help meet and I implemented all the right things. But somehow as I was offering all that I thought a good wife should be…I stopped offering myself.

If we change ourselves too much to be their help meet, we can make it too easy for our husbands and they can’t grow. We have to be honest – that’s what being a good help meet is.

Laura’s follow-up thoughts:

Eek, my notes as I scrawled frantically during my interview with Lisa were beginning to look rather scary at this point. I was trying so hard to listen well and write at the same time, but your guess is as good as mine about what I meant when I wrote, “use uhs as a good opp”. Huh? If you recall, this entire interview took place in fifteen minutes time. There was not time for neat penmanship.

Anyway, what I THINK Lisa was wisely saying to us is that being a good help meet doesn’t mean that we’re to just completely give up on what we need and desire in our marriage, just to make our husbands happy. We have to be honest and tell our husbands what we need, otherwise they can’t grow into the husband God desires them to be. 

I think that there are wonderful “be a better help meet” books out there, but I do often feel overwhelmed and inadequate after reading them. That’s part of the reason I started writing my own series about becoming a better help meet…to try to be real and practical…hopefully, sort of. 

So yes, being a good wife doesn’t mean that I should give up on who I am so that my  husband’s world will happily and smoothly go around. It does mean that I sometimes give up what I want. It does mean that I put his needs before my own. It does mean that I love him with all my heart and work very hard to meet his needs.

But meeting his needs may mean that I challenge him to improve his life and to work to better meet my needs. I’m only truly being his help meet if I am helping him become a better man of God.

I think this help meet thing calls for a lot of prayers for wisdom.

What do you think?

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Menu Plan for the Week

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Everything around me is starting to look like a green bean. Or a giganitic zucchini. This is such an exciting time of year!! I have 27 quarts of beans put up in the freezer already with plenty more ready to pick. Oh, and our corn is almost ready to eat!! Somebody hand me a stick of butter and a salt shaker.

Here’s our menu for the week, in which we add a few main dishes to our awesome fresh vegetables and fruits:

Sunday, July 18
Chocolate chip muffins, pears
Lamb roast, corn on the cob, cantaloupe
Cheeseburger zucchini boats, watermelon

Monday, July 19
Crepes with jelly
Hamburger patties, hashbrowns, green beans
BBQ brisket, cheesy mashed potatoes, tossed salad

Tuesday, July 20
Mini breakfast pizza, peaches
Black bean salsa with chips, applesauce, carrots
Fruit-kefir smoothies, soft pretzels, scrambled eggs

Wednesday, July 21
Simple soaked pancakes, blueberries
Salmon patties, strawberry peach slushies
Crock-pot chicken, carrots, green beans

Thursday, July 22
Creamy orange cooler, toast
Black bean taco salad, cherries
Chicken and rice, peas

Friday, July 23
Strawberry shortcake, fresh whipped cream
Turkey sausage, creamy mac and cheese, sauted zucchini
Lamb chops, baked potatoes, green beans

Saturday, July 24
Whole wheat donuts
Leftovers
Fried chicken legs, mashed potatoes and gravy, asparagus

Snacks to make and have on hand:

Just so ya know, we are busily working on something new for the site that we are hoping YOU will greatly enjoy. Be watching for a fun announcement in the next few days just as soon as we finish up all the details!!!
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Visit Organizing Junkie for more menu planning inspiration!

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Chatting With Lisa Whelchel (about raising teenagers)

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Yesterday I shared what Lisa Whelchel had to say about raising little ones. Her kids are all grown up now (her youngest just graduated), and because I really wanted to know for my own sake (and for yours too of course), I decided to ask her about raising teens.

Me:

Our oldest son just became a teenager. We’re enjoying this “new season of life” as we learn to raise a teen and also feel like we have no idea what we’re doing (much like we didn’t have any idea what we were doing when we started raising babies!). You had three teenagers all at once. What were some of the joys and challenges you faced as you raised your teens, and what advice might you give to parents on this journey?

Lisa:

As your kids become teenagers, you really have to start loosening the grip you have…you can’t control them like you did with they were seven and eight years old. It’s natural for them to try to separate themselves from you and experiment with life as they figure out who they are. 

This is hard because as a parent, you see the bigger picture and you want to protect them from heartache. But over-protecting can stifle what they are learning. You need to be open handed. You need to tell yourself, “I have been the parent, I have taught them well. Now I need to trust God to let them use what I’ve taught them as they grow into adulthood.”

Me: 

Tell me a little bit about your kids now that they are young adults. What are some of the great qualities you see in them – what do you love about your kids? 

Lisa:

I’ll start with my youngest, Clancy. I really just enjoy talking to her. We love to have coffee together in the mornings and just talk. She’s just wonderful and I just enjoy her so much.

Haven is my older daughter. I admire her so much. She is amazing at seeing the big picture. She plans margins in her life, which shows wisdom beyond her years. 

Tucker was the hardest to raise, yet he’s who I’ve learned the most from and I respect him so much. He’s honest about everything and not a pretender. I had a hard time with that as he was growing up because that could sometimes come across in him as “not being a good boy”. I’m glad I didn’t snuff that out of him. He’s creative…not a rule follower.

I love how although I am the parent, I am able to learn so much from my kids.

Laura’s (very few) follow-up thoughts (as I have only been the parent of a teenager for approximately 39 days):

I am really beginning to understand the idea of “loosening the grip” as I’m watching Asa naturally work his way toward more independence. Matt and I feel like our biggest job now is to walk alongside and guide him as he grows into adulthood. 

That, and pray for God to guide us as we walk a path we’ve never walked before. ;)

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Chatting With Lisa Whelchel (about raising little ones)

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I had the blessed opportunity to spend exactly 15 minutes on the phone with Lisa Whelchel on Thursday morning. It was an honor for me and here’s why:  Lisa’s book, Creative Correction, was life changing for me as a mama. 

I first read it when my kids were all little bitty guys. Reading Creative Correction helped me understand that my job was NOT to raise good kids just so that I could feel good about being a good mom. Somehow I hadn’t figured that out yet. I was very focused at that time on making sure my kids obeyed and acted the way they should (not a bad thing to focus on) BUT my motive was simply that I wanted to look good and not be embarrassed as a mother. Good kids meant I was a good mom, right?

creative

Creative Correction opened my eyes to the fact that my goal as I was raising my boys was to teach them about Jesus. To instill Godly behavior in them and a heart for Christ. To teach them scripture and a love for the Lord. It had nothing to do with ME at all. 

I was so grateful for the chance to tell Lisa “thank you” phone to phone. It was truly a delight.

Over the course of the next few days, I’ll be sharing parts of my conversation with Lisa. I appreciate all the great question ideas you sent my way and well…I have to apologize because while they were on my list…fifteen minutes goes very quickly and I barely had a chance to get through many questions at all. Hopefully you’ll all enjoy hearing what she had to say, even if it didn’t answer your specific question! Here’s the first question I asked Lisa…

Me:

“You had three babies in three years…many of my readers are in that season of life right now trying to juggle life with lots of little ones. What encouragement can you offer moms with little ones?”

Lisa:

“I’d say do as little as possible outside of being a mom. Don’t put your kids in a bunch of activities. Don’t be involved yourself in a lot of extra activities. You don’t need to try to lead a Bible study…don’t even go to a bunch of Bible studies if getting there takes too much out of you. There are so many good things to do, but you may need to give up even some of the good things you’re interested in doing so that you can do what you need to do for your family. Raising little ones takes a lot out of us and if we give a lot of our energy to outside things, we don’t have anything left for our family. This is a short season in life…later you can do more of the other things you feel are important, but right now raising your little ones is the most important. Spend time putting a bunch of meals in the freezer once a month so that all you have to do is heat something up for dinner and not spend time putting gourmet food on the table every night. Do everything you can to eliminate what is not necessary so that you can focus your energy on what is necessary.”

Laura’s follow-up thoughts:

I remember struggling to get out of the door by 9:30 for a Ladies’ Bible Study each Thursday morning when my boys were tiny (nursing, in diapers, potty training…). I don’t remember a thing about what we studied during those years. What I do remember is feeling like I wanted to CRY every single Thursday by the time I finally got there (late) and fought my kids to get into the nursery. Don’t even get me started on how much it wrecked their nap schedule and threw the entire day off and created a lot of grouchiness (the kids were usually grouchy too).

Why did I keep doing it week after week? Because it was “a good thing to do”. Because I felt like I should. Because I didn’t want to let the other ladies down. I don’t completely regret going…I formed some wonderful relationships with many of the older women from church. However, could I have cut myself some slack during those years? Could I have instead worked in some quiet Bible study at home by myself during their morning nap? Might I have saved my children from having a worn out, grumpy mom every Thursday afternoon and Friday morning (because I would then be behind on other things.)? Maybe so.

I think it’s good to look at the reasons we do what we’re doing, no matter what season in life we are in. What IS best for my family right now? What do I need to eliminate so that I can be the best wife and mom I can be? I’d love for you all to share your thoughts on this topic!

P.S. You know I agreed with Lisa’s statement about putting a bunch of food in the freezer for easy warm up!! :)

Coming up next:  Lisa talks about raising teenagers and having young adult children

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Becoming a Better Help Meet: Remind Yourself!

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help meet

Today I just want to share a simple little thing I do to remind myself all day that I think my husband is awesome!

This all came about rather innocently. I didn’t intentionally create this little exercise so that I could remind myself of how much I love Matt. It just happened, and then I realized how cool it was. It’s profound…are you ready?! 

I set one of my computer passwords (one that I use frequently) to say something great about Matt.  I was feeling giddy one day, and I needed to set a new password…and so just like I was in junior high writing “I LOVE MATT” on the side of my notebook between classes, I set my password to say it.

(“I LOVE MATT” isn’t the password, by the way. What, do you think I’d just tell all of you one of my passwords?)

(Or maybe it IS the password and I’m just telling you it isn’t just to throw you off.)

(Wow, I just forever keep you hopping, don’t I?)

But don’t you remember those feelings you felt back when you and your husband were dating and you couldn’t stop thinking about him and you wanted to carve your initials together into a tree? And tell all your friends about how great he was? And write his name on stuff?

Somehow life takes over and reality sets in and we as a couple become comfortable and not so giddy anymore. That’s mostly okay. We don’t really have time to sit around and sigh and daydream.

But having my password set to remind me all day long that I LOVE MATT (or something else, or not), has been so super neat. Like, totally.  (That would be me reverting back to junior high lingo.)

Typing in the words reminds me several times a day of how much I love my  husband. And in the middle of a very busy life full of activity and just…busyness…those reminders are a valuable treasure.

So, just a suggestion:  Set up a password or two to say something great about your relationship with your husband. You’ll appreciate the loving reminders!

LAURA AND MATT FOREVER XOXOXO

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You Can’t Drown A Bug

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Who knew that looking at a big ugly bug crawling around in the bottom of my kitchen sink would give me pause for reflection into my own life?

It was a bug. What was there to think about? Normally, I don’t have to think long when I see a bug of any kind. The question usually is as simple as, “Where is the nearest shoe?” Whereas snakes and birds may have me running the other way…bugs don’t tend to scare me very much. They’re creepy and they get on my nerves, but squishing a bug doesn’t usually faze me. Well, except for the crunch. Ick. I’m not a big fan of the crunch. 

Anyway, there it was scratching its eight or twelve or thirty little bug legs (I didn’t stop to count), trying with all of its might to find a way out of the bottom of my slippery, wet sink. While the question may have normally been, “Where is the nearest shoe?” I wasn’t too keen on taking off my flip-flop and putting it into the bottom of the sink to squish the bug. 

Therefore, I resorted to Plan B, which of course in the case of an ugly bug in the sink means:  Run Water Over the Bug. 

If you’ve ever run water over a bug, you will learn that a bug is quite unusually determined. It will put all of its eight or twelve or thirty legs to work at the same time, scratching as frantically as it can in the opposite direction of the flow of the water. And about the time you think you have surely captured the bug in the flow of the water and killed it, you will turn off the water and see that the bug was hardly fazed at all. It will, in fact, blink and sputter a time or two, then begin to crawl around again as if it only just experienced a lovely refreshing shower…not a near death experience.

You will then resort to Plan C which is to turn on the steaming hot water to kill the bug. Again, the bug will only act as if it just experienced a delightful dip in the hot tub at a spa resort. 

You can try scooping the bug up into a cup of water. It will go for a swim. You can try pushing it down the drain. It will come up for more like it just went down a cool water slide.

Nothing you can do will drown the bug.

There is only one thing you can do to get rid of the bug. You have to squish its guts out.

Lovely to think about isn’t it?

The moral of this story is a simple one:  If you have sin or strife in your life, you can not merely “run water over it” and try to get rid of it. Taking the easy way out will not result in cleaning up your life. Running water over it will only temporarily fix the issue, making it appear as if it is gone…but it will quickly resurface itself the moment the water is turned off.

If you have a sin in your life, you have to squish it. You have to hear the crunch. It will likely hurt. 

But then it will be gone. And you can clean up the guts that are splattered all over the place then fill that void in your life with something healthy, whole and good.

Yes indeed. Who knew you could learn so much from a bug?

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Gratituesday: The Date

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gratituesday

Everyone else had plans.

Malachi got to go to a birthday party. Asa and Justus got to go to yet a different birthday party. Matt was working.

That left just Elias and Mama. When does that ever happen? Mama with just one boy for an entire evening?

And so, I told Elias that he should use this opportunity to take me on a date. You should have seen his cute little eight year old eyes! And eye brows. And grin. You would have thought I had offered to buy him a toy store.

He didn’t say a word. He just wore that cute little joyful face and he just nodded. I could see the wheels turning inside his head, “Where should I take Mama? What should we do?” (And yes, he really does call me Mama. The older boys, and even Malachi have started calling me just “Mom” now…but Elias still says Mama. Yum, I love it.)

He decided to take me out to the China Buffet. We ate. We went back for seconds. We picked out desserts. We talked about silly stuff and serious stuff. We talked about what he might like to be when he grows up. We got tickled because we had the EXACT same fortune inside our fortune cookies. 

Daddy had slipped him a little cash to pay for our date, so Elias covered the bill. It was SO precious!!

I am going to work hard to make this happen with each boy as often as I can. Alone time with the kids is hard to come by. We’ll have to be intentional. But now that Elias has had his turn, the other boys are asking constantly about when it will be their turn to take me out. Since they’re so motivated, I think it will be easier to make it happen.

And hopefully, Matt will occasionally still be able to wrestle down the competition and take a turn himself. :)

What are you thankful for this Gratituesday? Write about it on your blog, then come link up with us here. If you don’t have a blog, be sure to leave a comment letting us know what you’re grateful for!

If you are linking up a blog post for Gratituesday,
please copy and paste the following sentence into your post! Thanks!

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Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Curriculum Kit…It’s Finished!! It’s Finished!!!

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If it’s loud in here, that’s because I’m running around the house with my arms waving in the air screaming:

It’s done, it’s done, it’s done, it’s done, it’s donnnnne!!!!!!!!!

After two years of planning and writing, fixing, changing, editing, dreaming, praying, crying and praying some more…it’s done!!! It’s DONE!!!

I’d like to take a moment to thank all the little people.

Seriously. The little people. My kids.  The ones who were the inspiration for all of this back in the day when they didn’t eat so much food. Back when they were my preschool servants. They are now a little bigger and I can’t thank them enough for eagerly helping me add ideas, create projects and take pictures for the tutorials included in the kit. And also for being patient with me during the past few weeks when they would ask me questions and I would look up from the computer with glassy eyes. God bless you boys for putting up with me.

And of course, you know how much I want to thank my husband. He is the reason this kit is finished, the reason it exists at all. My husband is my rock, the one who points me toward The Rock. He spent hours editing, offering suggestions and in general putting up with a wife who was distracted and talked in her sleep, as I spouted off craft ideas all beginning with the letter Ii. Seriously, this endeavor had me talking in my sleep. About the alphabet. To my husband. And he was kind enough not to make fun of me. I’m keeping him forever.

I also MUST thank Lenetta, who had the grueling task of editing the entire kit when it was formatted all crazy like. She has a gift for making the written word shine on paper and screen. And Char…for all your help in the past few days as we got everything finished up, I thank you.

And now…without further ado…Learn Your Letters, Learn To Serve Complete Curriculum Kit!

learnyourletters

Teach your child to serve…one letter at a time! This 240+ kit includes thorough lesson plans, games, crafts, recipes, memory verses, Bible story suggestions, vocabulary stimulation and discussion, play, books to read and so much more…all while encouraging service to God!

Each letter you study includes suggestions for service, such as “Take a new Bible to B__________” on Bb week, “Make soup for someone who is sick on Ss week, and “Deliver flowers to F_______________” on Ff week. Your child will make gifts or food, offer help and learn to think of others. As a family you can delight in praying together about who you would like to serve and what form of service you would like to offer! 

This curriculum kit can be used as a supplement to what you are currently doing to teach your child preschool basics…or it can be used all on its own as a complete early learners curriculum tool.  It is absolutely not just for home schoolers.  Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve is for any family who would enjoy learning and serving together with little ones.  In addition, Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Curriculum Kit may be purchased for use in a Sunday School Classroom or Preschool Classroom.

To get a feel for what this kit is like, help yourself to this free sample lesson!

What Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve includes:

  • 159 Page Learn Your Letters, Learn to Serve Book of ideas, instructions, recipes, tutorials and service planners  (the majority of this book can be left paperless, unless you choose to print it and bind it)
  • Alphabet Practice Packet (26 pages of printable letter writing practice)
  • Alphabet Project Packet (printable projects that go along with various lessons)
  • Memory Verse Packet (26 printable memory verses to decorate and place on the wall or in a binder)
  • Parent Planning Packet (planning pages, teaching suggestions, scheduling ideas)

Feel free to email me with questions!

I pray that you will be as blessed as our family has been as you learn and serve together!

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 $45.00

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After your purchase, you will be sent an email with your download links!

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