Heavenly Homemakers

Encouraging women in homemaking, healthy eating and parenting

Make Goals for 2020 – With Printable Worksheets!

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A new year is coming, and we’re encouraging you to make goals! Better than resolutions? SO MUCH BETTER. My friend Tasha is writing with some super practical encouragement and tips! Plus grab the printable worksheets she put together for us too. It’s like she thought of everything!!

Make Goals for 2020

By Tasha Hackett

Are you a New Year’s resolution maker?

I was! I loved making them. And just like the rest of you, I was not good at keeping them. By the end of January I had not kept up any of them, and by the end of February I didn’t even remember what they were. So… I gave up and decided life was too short to waste it feeling that kind of guilt. 

But then I discovered GOALS. 

Resolutions are so resolute. Get me? Like, you have to or it’s broken. Forever. No going back. A resolution is something you do when you want an immediate change. A goal is the end result of a change. A goal is something you have complete control over–and I do so love to be in control. Ask anyone who knows me. Being in control is my jam. I used to think I was a go-with-the-flow kind of girl. Turns out I am not. I’m usually like, “I am the flow, get in.” This attitude served me well growing up and through college. Being married and navigating the merging of his family with the way I was raised and then having four children–who are actually tiny humans with their own thoughts and dreams, rudely awakened me to some personality flaws in myself. Why do I tell you all this? No reason. 

So… GOAL = the object of a person’s ambition, an aim or desired result. (Thank you, Webster.) In other words: Something you control.

Do not confuse a goal with a desire or a resolution. Example: I will exercise everyday. That is a resolution. And what happens when I miss a day? Or two or seven. YEAR RUINED!! Example of a desire: My family will exercise with me. I do not have the power to dictate what my family does. Change that to a goal: To be able to jog 3 miles without feeling like I’m going to die. Then I work backwards and set up mini-goals to help me reach my main goal. This will include my family exercising with me, and this will most definitely include me attempting to exercise everyday, but my goal would not be derailed if those additions were to falter.

New Year’s Goals are Super Fun!

Maybe I’m a lot more Type A than I should be. But seriously, if you think about the point of goals is to make your life better then why would you not!?! Let’s do it! Not to completely overwhelm you, but did you know there are oh so many goal categories? Would you like to improve your life in any of these areas? Physical, Emotional, Spiritual, Career, Homemaking, Social, Financial… 

Your assignment is a simple and easy two-step process:

1. Print out the nifty Goal Setting Worksheet I’ve created for myself you and fill it out.

Personally, I am going to re-evaluate how I prepare meals. I’ve been reading Heavenlyhomemaker posts for years, and yet I still spend unnecessary hours in the kitchen. Apparently, there is a better way. With a 7, 5, 3 year old and a baby at home. Look at this cutie, he makes writing not easy or simple at all. 

I gotta get this figured out. So one of my goals will be to set up a new meal planning, shopping, cooking system. One that is Easy and Simple. Perhaps a book like this will help me. {Laura interjects a nod, a wink, and a smile!}

2. Print out the nifty Goal Achieving Worksheet (page 2) for each of your goals and fill it out. 

As for me, I will be looking into actually following the Simple Meals subscription, shopping with the list, scheduling weekly shopping trips, and planning meals in advance. I use so many of these recipes, and have implemented many time-saving strategies–such as freezing muffin batter, and making double or quadruple of a recipe. But I have been dragging my feet against actual meal planning. Time to grow up, Tasha! 

Would you like to grow up with me? Print your goal worksheets here. Have you been a resolution or goal setter in past years? Do they excite or frighten you? Drop a note and let us know!

Now excuse me while I go play peek-a-boo and nod to Laura because my Tex-Mex Chicken dinner is already in the crock-pot.  

Cheers!

Tasha

Grab the Goal Setting and Goal Achieving Worksheets here!

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Dear Mama, You Are Worthy

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Hey Mama, Wife, Friend, Aunt, Sister, Daughter, Dearest Child of God: You are Worthy!

Remember my friend Tasha? She’s the one that wrote Does Family Really Come First at Mealtime? She may become a regular voice around here because she’s got a lot of good words to share with us, plus she cracks me up a lot. She and I are raising babies together – Tasha, because she’s a young mom and me, because I’m an old mom raising babies for the second time. Who knew I’d get to be cool enough to hang out with the young moms again?!

Please enjoy Tasha’s words of humor and wisdom…

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Dear Mama, You Are Worthy

(Laura’s alternate title: I’m Not Naming Names but Someone Needs an Amazon Intervention)

By Tasha Hackett

Taking care of my baby, I have been surviving on roughly 3-5 hours of sleep per night for a few months. Total hours. Not even all at once. Pretty sure when God made the moon and sun and then the animals and humans he designed us to work in a rhythm that included the humans sleeping at night. I’ve told my husband, Ben, on more than one occasion, “I feel like I’m slowly dying.” 

During the long and seemingly endless nights, sometimes I read the Bible on my phone, and sometimes I remember that I need to change my Subscribe and Save order because I do NOT need another 25LB bag of rice. And sometimes I order a super cute sundress and when it arrives it turns out to be not nearly as cute on me as it is on the model.

One time I opened a package and found boho style parachute pants with peacock feathers designs on them and I did not have a memory of ordering them. Truly! I tried them on, and they fit. But I wondered who had sent them. Amazon knows. My orders show that I did indeed buy them two nights prior. I thought they looked ridiculous. Ben said, “You will wear them.… and let that be a lesson to you.” And wear them I did. With tennis shoes, obviously. Turns out they are the most comfortable pants EVER. My sleep-deprived subconscious apparently knew what I needed. I wore them all day, and all night, and the next day, etc… shhh. Don’t tell my Grandma.

Note from Laura: You, too, can have a pair of pants like these.
Also, if anyone can pull them off, it’s Tasha. Am I right?

My 3 am Amazon deals haven’t gotten me into too much trouble yet. I pushed the limit last week with the middle of the night purchase of the ever-coveted Blendtec. Yea. That was me. I’m the one in need of an Amazon intervention. I blame Laura. She talks and talks and talks about the Blendtec! Give us a break already! How are we to hold up against such constant nagging persuasion?! Also, it was on sale. Like, SO MUCH on sale. AND. IT’S FOR THE BABY! If I make the baby super yummy and healthy food he will grow strong and healthy and he will thank me someday. And maybe sleep?!?

Here’s Laura, nagging about the Blendtec.
You should get one.
You should so get one.
Get one! Get one now! Hurry up!
Now back to what Tasha was saying about how great it is that she bought a Blendtec…

So. Click. I bought it. Do I love it? Yes. Yes, I do.  In the first three days I made three types of baby food (with all the extra frozen into cubes and bagged for later), ground-up oats and coconut into flour, two smoothies, tomato sauce, ice cream, applesauce, frappuccino, strawberry whipped dessert…

Stevia Sweetened Chocolate Frappe

Buying the blendtec that night was a splurge. I had been considering one for over a year; my defenses were broken down that sleepless night. So, so, sleepless. I know this season of my life is just that. A season. I joke about many things, and I am enjoying parts of life, but I am surviving it one day at a time, one afternoon at a time, one hour… and sometimes the next ten minutes.

This past year of poor sleep has been one of the most difficult of my life. Okay, so I have an Amazon addiction. You want to know a little secret? This is a fairly new addiction. A couple of weeks ago, I decided that I needed help. Like, really needed help.

My physical, emotional, and spiritual red flags were waving. I decided that I would rather pay for that help than save up for a vacation that I had no energy to go on. I now pay someone to come clean my house once a week, I pay a highschooler to come babysit for an hour twice a week, I pay a neighbor to mow my huge lawn, I am meeting weekly with a counselor. …and, I started buying more things for myself. You know why? (I mean, besides the fact that it’s 3 in the morning and I’m scrolling around on Amazon.) It’s because I decided that I am worthy. I am worthy of using my money to buy things for myself. *GASP* 

I am not encouraging you to buy a bunch of stuff you don’t need. Please don’t. But if you are that Mama that scrimps when taking care of herself, is it because deep down you don’t feel like you deserve it? Like somehow you’re not worthy of having nice things? Are you so busy running around that you forgot to eat again? Did you “find time” to shower? 

So it has taken me two weeks to type this out because: motherhood. But tonight I have something amazing to share with you. The baby has begun to sleep. Praising God every morning. Last night was a full 8 hours at once. But with a clearer head, I have something important I wanted to tell you. 

You are so worthy!

I am crying out to you right now, please hear me. Did God send his only Son down here to be born as a tiny, crying, hungry, wet, and bloody baby for us to say, “Oh, I don’t deserve ____.”

Wow, isn’t God amazing?! Jesus came down here to be subject to a mother’s teaching. I guarantee you as a toddler he fell and scraped his knee and cried and Mary took him in her arms and dried his tears. The God of the whole universe came down here to be with us because he wanted you to know, to really really know, how much you are loved. You are his beloved. 

You are worthy of love. You are worthy of being happy. 

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Why You Need to Say “Yes!” to Offers of Help

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I hear far too often from people who struggle to say “yes” to offers of help. Most definitely they don’t ever want to have to ask for help. I’ve struggled with the same, and today I want to share what God has been teaching me about why we should say “yes” to offers of help.

It’s a beautiful thing when God takes you on a journey that is too difficult to walk alone. Beautiful, you ask? To walk a difficult journey? Yes. Because it is while trudging through that difficult journey that we meet Him more fully. That is where we get to know His power. That’s where we learn how much we need Him and can’t live life without Him. That’s where we learn full surrender of self.

And while we are there, that is where He teaches us that we need His people. While God leads us down the challenging path, He is simultaneously telling others, through the power of the Holy Spirit, exactly what to do for us and say to us.

So reason #1 to say “yes” to offers of help:

You don’t want to miss out on the powerful work of the Holy Spirit on your behalf through others!

I cannot begin to express the joy we have experienced through our unexpected foster care and adoption journey when we have received direct blessings of the Holy Spirit through the hands of others.

As glorious as this journey has been, it has also been filled with many incredible difficulties. When we’ve cried out for God to meet a specific need, and then someone shows up, in obedience to God’s call, and meets that specific need? It is mind-blowingly beautiful. When we’ve had a need that we weren’t even able to put into words, then God works through His Spirit to meet the need He knows we have? It’s awe-inspiring. Truly powerful and humbling.

If God puts it on someone’s heart to reach out and serve us, but we pridefully say, “No. I’m okay. Thanks anyway,” we are ultimately saying, “No thanks, God. I don’t want or need your help. I can do this without you.”

Stop it. No you can’t. I know I certainly can’t. We absolutely need God and we absolutely need the help of His people.

This leads me to reason #2 we need to say “yes” to offers of help:

We are called to live a life of humility.

Pride is the ugly demon that makes us think we don’t need or shouldn’t want help. Pride tells us we can do it ourselves, alone. Pride tells us we need to be strong enough. Pride tells us we are admitting weakness if we say “yes.”

The truth is that we are showing great strength when we say “yes” to offers of help. When we deny ourselves, cast off sinful pride, and receive help with open arms, we are allowing God’s strength to be ours.

What if we chose to die to ourselves and let God be fully at work? What do we have to lose? Self. What do we have to gain? All that God has to offer!

And reason #3 to say “yes” to offers of help:

Because…we need it. We. Need. Help.

Don’t say you don’t, because you do. I do. We all do.

WE CANNOT DO THIS LIFE ALONE.

We need Jesus. We need each other. When others step in to take the baby, entertain the 5-year old, give a ride to the 14-year old, offer guidance and support to the 17-year old, hug me and let the tears fall (again), or do any number of the incredible acts of service God has put on their heart to do – I am overcome with gratitude and filled with relief, because of the lifted and shared burden of all that life on this earth tends to bring. There is no big act of service or small act of service. When someone serves according to the way God calls them to serve – IT IS ALL BIG.

When I joyfully accept every offer of help – I am experiencing God’s perfectly planned provision for my life and for my family. I’m not sure there anything more delightful than this. Why would I ever want to say “no” to this?!

Can I afford diapers? Yes. Can I hold the baby by myself during an entire church service? Sure. Can I load up the Littles and chauffer my teens to all their events? It is possible. Can I take the Littles to all of the Big’s events, all by myself? With a stash of cheese sticks and juice boxes, you bet. Can I put on my big girl pants and pull myself up by my bootstraps and do all the things all of the time? That’s what I’d like to tell myself.

But no. I can’t. Not all of the time, and neither can you.

We want to think that we can because when it really comes down to it, we can all work until we become raw and bloody while never asking for help. As if it’s honorable to be miserable. As if suffering for the sake of pride earns us a sparkly star on a chart.

This is all rubbish.

Start saying “yes” to offers of help.

And while you’re at it, confidently ask for help too.

Do it without apology. Do not be sorry for needing help or for receiving the gift of experiencing God at work in your life and the lives of others.

Say “yes” to offers of help.

You will experience God in ways you never have before. You will get to know your friends and neighbors and church family in ways that will amaze you. You will see God at work in how He has gifted people so that when you cheerfully say, “Hey, thank you so much for your help!!” they will say, “Sure, no problem!” because it will be true! When God is in it, it isn’t a problem.

The time to say “yes” is now.

Don’t cop out with “I’m not sure, this is a hard one for me” or “Oh well, I’ll keep working on it.”

It isn’t about you, and your work has nothing to do with this. Stop right now and ask God to show you how to say “yes” to offers of help.

Then let Him. Let Him be at work in your heart to show you the beauty of saying “yes” to help and of reaching out to ask for help when you need it. He is faithful! He will show you exactly what to do, exactly who to ask, and even when you don’t know what to ask, He will provide it anyway.

When He does, say “yes!”

Then watch and see all the goodness He will show you through your “yes.” Life as a body of believers is about to become more beautiful.

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What to Take on a Family Picnic

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With all the sporting events our family takes part in, I have become a bit of an expert on packing food to go. Now that we have little ones in the house again, I’ve been putting that expertise once again toward packing a family picnic. Who knew we weren’t yet finished with days of heading to the park on warm days to enjoy friends, food, and sunshine!

Certainly, you can head to the park with nothing more than some sandwiches, a blanket, and a jug of water. But we decided it would be fun to brainstorm a huge variety of ideas to encourage many meaningful family outings!

With the help of my friend Kim, we’ve put together an enormous list of everything you could possibly need or want for a fantastic family picnic!

My favorite to-go treat? Strawberry Cheesecake Parfaits!

What to Take on a Family Picnic

In this post, we’ll give you a great list of specifics to meet all your picnic needs. Here’s a basic checklist of items you’ll want to consider taking:

  • Food
  • Drink
  • Basket
  • Tablecloth or Blanket
  • Plates/Cups/Utensils
  • Toys
  • Hats
  • Sunscreen
  • Bug Repellent
  • First Aid Kit

It’s time to get ready for your family picnic!

Here’s a list of all the items we’ve found to recommend for optimum fun:

Baskets and Coolers

You’ll be filling these with food, and we’ve shared a long list of great food ideas below! But first, let’s talk about great options for containers to hold your food and drinks.

And good luck deciding which of these you like best for your family. I kind of want all of them. ;)

  • Traditional Picnic Basket – We received one like this as a wedding gift and it has been so fun!
  • Picnic “Bag” with Cooler – Oooh, now this is both fun and practical!
  • Picnic “Bag” – the Backpack Version – Um. Yes.
  • Soft Cooler on Wheels – You had me at “wheels.” Also, this one folds up.
  • Hard-Sided Rolling Cooler – Also on wheels, but sturdy.
  • Extra Large Rolling Cooler – I think your entire refrigerator will fit in this. I’m serious.
  • Mesh Bag with Cooler Bottom – For the picnics in which you don’t need your entire refrigerator.

Water Bottles and Jugs

Taking drinks for a crowd? Or maybe just individual bottles. Here are some wonderful options!

  • 5-Gallon Water Jug – So that everyone within several acres can stay hydrated.
  • Metal Screw Lid Bottle – Good luck choosing your favorite!
  • Wide Mouth Metal Bottles – Also lots of great color choices.
  • Fun Metal Bottles with a Straw Lid – Ooh, I love these!
  • Stainless Steel Water Bottles for Kids – They can pick their fav!
  • Wide Mouth Glass Bottle – Water tastes better this way!
  • Glass Bottle with Straw – I think this is pretty. :)

Picnic Table Covers

Not that we don’t love eating on a table that may or may not be covered with splotches of bird poop…

  • A Cover for both Table and Benches – Ooh, I like!
  • Table/Bench Covers, without elastic – Much cheaper than the one above, but not as easy to use.
  • Clips to Hold the Table Cloth – If you take a regular cloth from home

And an easy/cheap/fun picnic table hack:

You can use a twin-sized fitted sheet as a picnic table cloth! It’s easy to fit onto the table then throw in the wash later!

Umbrellas and Canopies

Sitting on the ground instead of at a picnic table? Here are some great items you might need.

  • Umbrella for Shade – This is fantastic!
  • Tent/Canopy – Even better for a bigger group.
  • Large Roll-Up Picnic Blanket – I have one of these and it is AWESOME!
  • Heavy Duty Ground Tarp- Whoa, much more durable than a blanket.

Hats

Gotta keep the sun out of our eyes and off our faces!

  • Hat for Ladies – Purty cute!
  • Hat for Men – I think even my teens would want one of these!
  • Hats for Kids – Lots of colors to choose from.

Fun Outdoor Games

Too old for slides and swings? Here are some great outdoor game ideas!

molkky

  • Kubb
  • Lawn Bowling
  • Yard Dice
  • Ladder Ball 
  • Molkky
  • Washer Toss
  • Ring Toss
  • Frisbee Golf (Disc Golf) Set
  • Floating Pong

Great Outdoor Toys

Skip the food. I’m going on a picnic just to play with this stuff! (Just kidding. I want food too.)

  • Kites – I can’t believe how fun these look!
  • Whistling Rockets – These go a LONG way, and they whistle too!
  • Sandbox Toys – Look at this fantastic set!
  • Kid-Sized Shovel – Because why not just dig holes? (But not at a public park.)
  • Small Bend-Proof Trowell – My kids used to dig with these in sand volleyball pits!
  • Fun Garden Tool Set – Truly, just take me to a sand pit to play.

Exploring and Learning

You’re sure to find many teachable moments!

  • Walkie-Talkies – These actually come in fun colors!
  • Batteries for Walkie-Talkies – Don’t forget. :)
  • Weather Radio – It’s solar charged, plus it is a flashlight, AND will charge your phone!
  • Binoculars – Ah, yes. Who knows what you might find?
  • Durable Kid Binoculars – Not that they would drop/break the others…

Skin Care

Just in case…

  • Non-Toxic Bug Block – our very favorite!
  • Deet-Free Mosquito Bands – These are pretty cool!
  • Soothing Rash Cream – Good for just about any owie.
  • Organic Sunscreen – Yes, I actually make my teen and adult kids use this one too.
  • First Aid Kit – It’s got a little bit of everything!

What food should you take on a picnic?

Well, the sky’s the limit on food ideas! But here are some of our top suggestions:


1. Sandwiches or Wraps. Some of our favorites:

2. Chips and Dips. Some of our favorites:

3. Fruit with Dips. Some of our favorites:

Favorite Fruits:

  • Apples
  • Bananas
  • Strawberries
  • Oranges
  • Blueberries
  • Pears
  • Blackberries
  • Raspberries

4. Veggies and Dips. Some of our favorites:

With:

  • Petite Baby Carrots (so much sweeter and easier to eat!)
  • Sliced Cucumbers
  • Broccoli
  • Cauliflower
  • Sweet Peppers
  • Celery

5. Crackers with Cheese and Meat

6. Chips and Salsa

7. Hamburgers and Hotdogs

8. Salads. Some of our favorites:

Some of our favorite Salad Dressings:

9. Fun Packable Side Dishes. Some of our favorites:

10. Chicken Legs, hot or cold. Some of our favorites:

11. Fun Desserts. Some of our favorites:

12. Fun Drinks. Some of our favorites:

13. Pre-Packaged Food to Go

Sometimes you just need a little convenience, am I right? Here are some of our favorite grab and go packaged snacks:

  • Stretch Island Fruit Leather
  • Go Squeeze Applesauce Pouches
  • Larabars
  • Simply Brand Bagged Chip Variety
  • Bagged Nuts

Need some handy food containers to hold your awesome food?

Here are some great ideas:

  • BPA Free Plastic Containers with Lids
  • Pyrex Bowls with Lids – You KNOW these are my favorite!! I have two complete sets that I use constantly!
  • Don’t forget paper plates, napkins, utensils, serving spoons, and cups too!

What do you take on your family picnic?

 

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Stop Telling Moms of Little Ones to “Enjoy Them While They’re Young!”

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“They grow up so fast! Enjoy them while they’re young!” Yeah, we know. We all know. It’s so true! And yet, I believe it’s time to stop saying this to moms of little ones…

I get it. Oh, how I get it. Once our kids grow up, have a mind of their own, start doing big things, can no longer crawl into our laps, and have problems much bigger than those which can be solved with a kiss on the forehead – we older moms find it easy to look back at the little years with longing. We look at pictures of our kids with their pudgy fingers, wearing the matching outfits we selected for them to wear – and we wonder where the years have gone.

We see that our grown-up kids are taking hard classes, going to prom, and graduating from college and we can’t believe how fast time went. So we look at the mom with babies in her arms and toddlers in her lap and we try to encourage her with, “Enjoy them while they’re young. They grow up so fast!”

Oh, it is true. They do grow up fast!

But today, as I find myself in a season that involves a double portion – that of marveling at my adult and teen children while taking on the task of raising a 5-year old Bonus Boy and fostering a precious 5-month old Boy Babe – I find myself realizing the full truth:

This is hard.

It’s good and it’s marvelous and it’s incredible, but it’s hard.

You can look at my precious new littles, then look up at me and say, “Oh Laura! They are so sweet! Enjoy them while they’re young!” and I will emphatically nod and tell you, “Oh yes! I am!!” I am enjoying our little ones an incredible deal – because of all of the sweetness and cuteness and fun! I am enjoying them so much!

But do you know what else I would enjoy right now?

Sleeping.

Taking a shower.

Eating when I’m hungry.

Drinking my coffee while it is still hot.

Having a full conversation with my husband (that isn’t about the last time the baby pooped).

Not having to stop what I’m doing every three minutes to discipline and train our 5-year old to learn obedience.

Moms of Bigs, do you remember all that was involved in taking care of your little ones? Do you really remember? Oh, there is so much joy in the little years!! But there’s also a lot of poop and puke, tantrums and tattling – along with a never-ending list of work to do that you know you’ll never get around to because little ones require so much attention and care.

These are hard (and good) years, just as raising big kids is hard (and good).

What if older moms stop telling young moms to “enjoy them while they’re young,” and start saying this instead:

“How can I help you enjoy your little ones?”

Think about this.

Moms of Bigs – you no longer have to wipe bottoms, buckle seatbelts, have irrational conversations about broken cookies, or help all the shoes get onto all the right feet. You are, no doubt, in a season of challenge that involves running around like crazy with busy activity schedules, guiding your kids while they make weighty decisions, and then helping them with Geometry after 10:00 pm (Jesus, be near). This is all full of hardship and exhaustion – no doubt about it! But the truth is that even through these challenging days: YOU CAN ACTUALLY GO PEE WHENEVER YOU WANT.

I know this because just a year ago, I was there. With kids who were then 20, 18, 16, and 13 – I thought I was busy, because I absolutely was. Then God put babies on my doorstep and in my arms. Now I’ve got all those big kids plus a pre-schooler and an infant. It’s both fabulous and difficult, beautiful and challenging. I love what God is teaching me through this new gift and calling!

But – some of the days are hard to enjoy. “Enjoy them while they’re young!” I’m trying! But I am also tired.

Here’s what helps me get through these challenging days:

  • When my friends bring over a batch of muffins or waffles for my family to grab and eat quickly for breakfast.
  • When they come to hold the baby while I take a nap.
  • When they grab the 5-year old for some special play time.
  • When they give my big kids rides so I don’t have to load up little ones into car seats.
  • When they grab the baby at my big kids’ soccer game so I can cheer with my arms free.
  • When they drop off a lasagna for me to slide into the oven on a busy day.
  • When they hug me and tell me that I’m doing a good job.

Stop simply telling moms of little ones to “enjoy them while they’re young.” That encouragement falls flat in the ears of a tired mama. AND, it makes them feel guilty for not enjoying the puke-filled, sleepless nights that are apparently – fleeting? Yeah, we’re sorry. Nothing feels fleeting at 3:00 am.

Instead, consider doing what you can do to help young moms enjoy these challenging years. Let your big kids help you with this. It’s a win-win!

What you should say to moms of little ones:

Don’t tell them to “enjoy them while they’re young!” Instead, do what you can to help them enjoy these years! Here are some better options every mom of littles actually wants to hear!

  • Can I come take your kids to the park for an hour?
  • I see what you’re doing, and you are rocking it! Good job, Mama!
  • What night can I bring your family dinner this week?
  • Your kids are so sweet – great work!
  • I’d like to come watch your kids so you can have a date night. What night works for you?
  • Can I stop by today and bring you a coffee?
  • What size diapers is your baby in? I’ll grab you a package!

This is just a small list, and no doubt, God will fill in the gaps and put on your heart what YOU can do for your friends with little ones. But do consider how you can be a blessing to the weary mamas who are in the snot-filled, wet wipe, dirty-dish-piled trenches. Those days are hard, and those mamas need our real encouragement.

Then, guess what? Those moms really can enjoy them while they’re young! Because it takes a village, and moms with their big kids can be a part of that village!

Moms of big kids? You hang in there too. I know these days are fabulous and exhausting too – because I’m right there with you.

Whether your kids are big or little – or a beautiful mixture of both – we can stand together in encouragement. We can tell each other the truth – that God is carrying us through each day – that He is our provider – that He is with us constantly as we raise our kids.

Be encouraged, Mama! God is with you, and He is good! Because of this, we CAN enjoy every day with our kids.

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My Current Favorite Cheat Meal – and How I Make it Healthier

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I have a new favorite cheat meal, and I don’t even feel bad about it.

It was about this time last year that I wrote my Beyond the Free Range Chicken post. In that post, I expressed that while I still love and desire to feed my family as healthy as possible, I’ve learned that it is more important to focus my time and energy outside the kitchen loving people. What’s more important?

  • Raw milk and organic produce? OR
  • Loving God and loving our neighbors?

I’m going to go with The Greatest Commandment.

Learning to Love

Little did I know what God was doing in our lives as He was teaching us to take hold of His commands and the promises of joy that came with them! He’s helping us learn to love better, to see people, and to share the hope He constantly provides. Meanwhile, He moved a 4-year old Bonus Boy into our house. He’s the son of one of the “neighbors we were loving on.” The 4-year old turned 5, and after a few months, it was decided that our family would adopt him.

The busy lives we had been living became much, much busier – but no matter because God has been in every part, perfectly providing everything we need. He’s been showing us during all of this how to let go of what isn’t important for His Kingdom and to fix our eyes more firmly on what He has to offer.

I could share thousands of words about all we are learning. But today, regarding food? Here’s a biggie I’ve learned: Who cares if you sometimes need to eat a less-than-perfect meal if the tradeoff is having more time to share Jesus’ love with others? Pray over the food, throw out the mixed greens or easy veggie to go with it, and trust that God is still providing His best for you.

This leads me to share my current favorite cheat meal. Don’t get too excited. It’s not even something to pass out over.

My Current Favorite Cheat Meal

It’s homemade-ish pizza.

Sure, I can make homemade pizza crust. Here’s the recipe for the days you have time. It’s fabulous. I recommend it. But you know what else I recommend for the days you don’t have time (because you’ve been sharing God’s love with people)?

Pre-made Pizza Crust. Organic…or not. Whole grain…or not. God is bigger, my friends. It’s just a pizza crust. This should not make us lose sleep. God’s purposes for our lives are bigger than the occasional serving of white flour.

I now regularly buy pre-made pizza crusts to keep in my freezer. About once every week, between foster care meetings and court dates and diapers and bottles and therapy appointments, I ask my big boys pull some out and top them as they please. This is our lunch or our dinner and it is so easy!

How do I make it healthier?

First, I don’t stress over it. A peaceful heart is great for one’s health. Second, we pull out mixed greens and eat salad with it. Often fresh fruit too. Again – SO EASY. It’s also fun and tasty, an added bonus.

And there you have it: My favorite cheat meal.

In the tug of war for all that demands our attention, loving people should win every time!

 

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Always, Always, Always Be Kind

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Almost without a doubt I can say that behind every rude comment, dirty look, or grouchy disposition is a hurting person. Can we, as God’s chosen people, choose to be kind no matter what?

God continues to show me that a kind answer truly does turn away wrath. It’s as if choosing to do what He instructs in the Bible actually works. Weird.

Always Be Kind

There are days I am so tired I can’t see straight. Still, I must be kind. People have spat out biting words, have verbally disapproved of my choices, and have questioned my motives. It hurts. I want to become defensive. But when I respond in kindness, the person softens.

People have been angry with me for saying “no,” for setting healthy boundaries, for doing what God wants instead of what they want. I’m tempted to lash out. But when I take a step back, pray, and respond in kindness, the person softens.

Often I feel justified in letting someone know my side of the story. How dare someone get frustrated or angry with me?

But kindness is the right response. Always, always, always be kind.

Friends, we aren’t entitled. No one owes us anything. People may spew out cutting remarks that “we don’t deserve.” Not everyone is seeking Jesus and therefore, not everyone will act like Him. This shouldn’t shock us. This shouldn’t offend us. This shouldn’t make us step up indignantly with an ungodly retort.

Most definitely we should not spit out our grievances to friends or on social media, getting others to join our side with, “I can’t believe that happened to you! What is wrong with people these days!?” This invites the enemy to set up camp. He sees his chance to be a part of something gross and he eagerly grabs on. “Let’s do this together,” he says. “I’ll give you more hurtful words. I’ll provide you with wonderful responses. I’ll put more indignant people on your side. Oh, it’s on.”

Lord, forgive us.

Consider Jesus’ response to all who opposed Him. Never did He give an eye-roll and spit out, “Did you really just say that to me? Do you even know who I am?”

Because obviously the people didn’t know who He was and Jesus knew that. His response was compassion. “Father, forgive them. They don’t know what they’re doing.”

Can we learn to respond to ugliness like Jesus did? Can we practice surrender of self and a heart full of grace toward the hurting? Can we react to biting remarks with gentleness and compassion?

The world tells us that this makes us weak. Truth tells us that this makes us strong. After all, it’s easy to disregard self-control, to vomit up the first ugly retort that comes to mind, to meditate on a hurtful conversation, and to nurse bitterness. But it takes great strength to do what is right. One who relies on God’s strength to truly show love in adversity displays incredible wisdom and courage.

People will wrong you. Hurt people will react in the only ways they know and have been taught. The broken have forgotten to smile and are unable to look up, unable to recognize hope and goodness. It’s up to God’s people to shine light through the darkness.

Let the Lord be at work in you. Deny yourself, pick up your cross, realize the Truth within you that has set you free.

Be filled with the Holy Spirit and let His fruit pour out as you look beyond the circumstances and into the heart of the hurting.

Always, always, always be kind.

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The Truth About Having a Productive Day

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This spring, God gave our family a glorious opportunity to serve in an unexpected way.

It all happened quite suddenly, and before I knew it, there was a precious pink bundle in my lap. We rocked, we prayed, and we loved. We didn’t sleep much.

We made phone calls, had meetings, and did research. We constantly sought God’s best for this wee one and her family.

Day after day, I fell wearily into bed hoping to catch a few hours of sleep before a night-time feeding. I’d see unfolded laundry piled up nearby, reminding me of all I hadn’t done. I knew the dishes were waiting downstairs. I couldn’t remember what my family had eaten but I was pretty sure there were no vegetables involved. I hadn’t checked email, much less answered any inquiries. Bills stacked up on the counter-top and the registration forms for my kids’ prom were threatening to become past due.

Each night, I was very tempted me to say, “Wow, I didn’t get one thing done today.” But God stopped me, convicting me that was a lie the enemy wanted me to believe.

The truth was, I’d changed diapers, made bottles, and rocked, held and loved on a baby all day long. I’d shown my boys how to hold a baby, and maybe even how to lay down their lives for others in the midst of crisis.

I’d made phone calls and advocated for the future of this dear one. I’d gone to a WIC appointment. I’d picked up formula. I comforted, and cooed, and gave tummy time.

Most of all, I’d prayed.

Friends, there is nothing, not one thing, more productive than prayer.

In the midst of loving people, standing in the gap for those who have no voice, and serving the “least of these,” we must never look at the un-done chores and feel as though we’ve been unproductive.

A clean house means nothing when there are hurting and lost people in our midst. A scrubbed kitchen is meaningless when there are little ones to rock and faces to be wiped. Folded laundry is ridiculously overrated when there are naked to clothe and hungry to be fed.

As soon as my arms were free, I baked and I cooked and I washed and I typed. I scrubbed and I organized and I emailed. I felt so productive! I had accomplished so much! My check-list was complete and my chores were diminished!

But the truth had won out. A check-list is just a check-list. Chores are just chores. The true definition of productivity is love.

Loving people is always productive, whether it looks like a home-cooked meal in a clean kitchen or a store-bought pizza on paper plates. God’s love wins. When we listen, obey, serve, and trust, we are productive. When we let the Holy Spirit live through us, when we surrender and let God work, we have done the exact thing God had planned for us to do. This is perfect productivity.

Did you love people today? Then you were productive. Did you pray and trust God today? Then you chose the very best. Did you let God work while you listened to His voice and responded in obedience? You have been incredibly productive.

Put love on your list and check it off daily. You’ll be amazed at how productive you become.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

P.S. I wrote and scheduled this post back in April after we’d been caring for a 3-month old girl. Just a few days later, God made us foster parents to a four-year old boy. It’s amazing how God prepares His people! I have to fall back on this Truth every day as I care for  this little boy.

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How God Broke My Chains and Set Me Free: Piercing with Purpose

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The past five years, God’s been working a major overhaul in my heart. Today I am delighted to share the latest – a beautiful new way God broke my chains and set me free.

How God broke my chains and set me free

If you’ve ever lived in fear of pleasing all the people – all the time, you know that this is impossible and therefore excruciatingly painful. I lived much of my life in knots of anxiety – my head, my heart, my gut – all in knots, as I worked so hard to be what people wanted me to be and of course, in an effort to “do all the right things.”

It all sounded so good at the time. I wanted to serve people, to do right, to make everyone happy. I thought I was on the right track, that the anxiety was simply a part of who I was.

Until God broke me. He painfully, gently, beautifully, and faithfully broke me. He took me to a place so desperate I had no choice but to look up, to kneel down, and to surrender.

Nothing about being broken is easy. It’s simple, but it isn’t easy. It’s simple because God and His promises are faithful and perfect. It’s hard because dying to self, walking away from who you once were, learning new Truths about who God actually is, and bravely turning your back on where the enemy has held you in bondage means he’ll start attacking in other ways in an effort to keep you as his slave.

Not today, Satan.

chains2

Praise God, His power is bigger!

In the name of Jesus, and because of the love of Jesus, Satan is powerless over us. We are a new creation. We are in Jesus. We are free!

As I’ve been learning to trust God fully, walking my way through the fire of refinement and eagerly seeking healing for my brokenness, He began revealing more and more pieces of His plans for me.

Last summer He said, “It’s time to speak up. Share what you are learning. Do not settle for mediocrity. Tell my people to break free from what has become comfortable. Staying in comfort is not what I ask of my people. I ask people to die to self so they can fully experience my love and selflessly love their neighbor. Share what you’ve been learning so others can learn to truly live life through the promise of the Holy Spirit.”

As a faithful follower, of course I answered with, “Thanks for the offer, God. I don’t want to do that. Ask someone else.”

And He replied, “I am not healing you for silence.”

Fearfully, I cowered.

God continued to refine and renew me. He led me through Scripture to reveal Truth I’d been blinded to before. He guided me through trial to reveal His faithfulness and provision. He walked me through pain to teach me how to trust Him. He taught me to truly seek the Holy Spirit for constant guidance and peace. Then again He said, “Share what you’re learning.”

But I said, “It’s all too weird for me. I’m not comfortable with this. I don’t know what to say.” (Sound familiar? Hey, Moses. Be my BFF. Let’s come up with a secret Exodus 4:13 handshake.)

God said, “Laura, trust me. Trust and obey. I will give you all the words.”

In the weeks that followed, I continued to seek Him, continued to walk forward, but continued to stay quiet. I watched God move and work and I relished in His goodness and power. But I remained silent. Perhaps I can just lead by quiet example, I thought. And again He said, “It’s time.”

“It’s time for you and every one of my people to move past what is comfortable. I call people to love and live through the power of the Holy Spirit. Stand up, stand firm, stand strong. Learn to truly seek me, to love me, and to love others.”

And then He told me to do something outward, something entirely out of my comfort zone. It’s almost too funny to say, because really, would God ask a person to do this? I had no problem with others doing it. But me? Ha! I’m 44 years old. Really, God? Did I just hear you right? Did you really just tell me to go out and get my nose pierced? In the name of Truth and Freedom?

I laughed until I realized that God really meant it.

For two weeks I wrestled. I cried, I barely slept, and I hardly ate. I sought guidance and counsel from wise people God selected, secretly hoping someone would talk me out of it. True and faithful friends that they were, they stood by my side and encouraged me to obey.

I asked over and over, “God, please make this clear. Did you really tell me to pierce my nose as a message to the church that we are to break free of what is comfortable and seek actual, true freedom in you? This is a beautiful message, and how desperately I want to share, but please, Dear Jesus. This is too weird, too hard for me.”

He reminded me that He told Hosea to marry a prostitute to convict people of their unfaithfulness. He asked Ezekiel to eat a scroll, then lie down on his left side for 390 days and eat defiled foods to send a message to His people. Ok, fine. Put a tiny sparkle in my nose? I can do that. I think. Maybe?

What will people think, Lord? I’m Laura Coppinger, the one who serves in the background, writes behind a computer screen, feeds all the people all the food. I don’t even wear make-up or care about jewelry, for goodness sake.

I was willing to obey God but I became terrified. What would I tell people? Was this really from God? People would disapprove.

Bingo.

While I had thought God asked me to do this as a message for His people (and He did), I learned that He really asked me to do this to cleanse my own broken heart. The pride. The selfishness. Wanting approval from people – this sin I’ve struggled with since I was a tiny girl. I thought God had healed this part of me. But suddenly I became well aware of the ugly monster still within.

God and I had more work to do.

Free me, Lord! I don’t want to be in bondage. Break my chains! Cleanse me of this pride and selfishness, and the anxiety that grips me over the fear of disappointing people.

Oh our God is faithful. He is good and holy and righteous. He is healer. He is victorious! He binds our wounds and sets the captive free!

I obeyed. I did it.

pierced with purpose

And just like that, I was free! FREE!!!!! Jesus set me free. Chains broke, snapped in two, and dissolved. The yoke of slavery is defeated. We live in freedom!

It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by the yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1

God bless my husband, my sons, and the precious friends God chose to walk these weeks with me. I’m not sure I’ve ever been so outwardly messy, so painfully aware of my weaknesses, so humbly in awe of my need for surrender.

There is glorious freedom in surrender. There is tremendous joy in obedience! And as an added perk, I crazy LOVE my tiny little nose piercing! Who knew? (God.) It is a constant, sparkling reminder to me of the healing God offers and the freedom He provides.

Friends, we serve a God who has called us to holy living. We are chosen by a Father who wants to refine, cleanse, and heal our brokenness. We are saved by the blood of Jesus. And we have been provided with His Spirit to live inside us constantly and fully so that we can be in His Kingdom now and forever.

Learn to listen. Be open and free and willing to be taught and cleansed. Welcome His truth. Deny the schemes of the enemy to hold you back. Ask for fresh eyes and an open heart to reveal truth from Scripture about how the Holy Spirit works and lives among us.

Trust. Obey. Be free!

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Beyond the Free Range Chicken

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Many of you remember my God is Bigger Than a Free Range Chicken post, and fondly refer to it as one that was refreshing and life changing for you. It made the Best Of Heavenly Homemakers book as one of the top picks. Fun!

fried-chicken2

If I were to summarize that post, I would simply say: If you can’t afford free range chicken (or fill in the blank with any number of other great food options like grass fed beef or cage free eggs), you need not worry. God is bigger. He will provide. And at least serving your family a conventionally raised chicken is better than serving them highly processed boxed food filled with MSG.

So that’s that.

Beyond the Free Range Chicken

Today I’d like to share with you how far God has taken me in a different direction during the past few years in regard to the free range chicken.

Yes, I still prefer to serve my family grass fed beef and free range poultry. Yes, I love my organic greens. Truly, I can tell the difference in cage free eggs compared to regular store bought.

But none of this – not any of it – matters when I look beyond all that is physical and earthly into what I believe God asks us to focus on for His Kingdom purposes.

Perhaps I could restate this by re-writing my own version of 1 Corinthians 13: If I have a perfectly raised, free range chicken, but have not love, I am nothing but a conscientious cook whose meat is free of antibiotics. If I have dozens of cage free eggs, a refrigerator full of organically grown produce, and a freezer filled with grass fed beef, but have not love, I am nothing.

But then, of course, I’d need to switch back to the actual words from this passage once we get to verse four: “Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud…”

A couple years ago, Matt and I asked God to show us what it really means to “Love God and love our neighbor.” He has been faithful to teach us and in short, we’ve learned that true love looks a lot different than inviting people into a perfectly clean house so that we can serve them grass fed pot roast with a side of organic carrots.

God’s love looks like seeing people who are often overlooked. It looks like listening to people who are lonely. As of late, for Matt and me, love looks like spending time with new friends who just got out of prison and are determined to make a new life for themselves in Jesus. It looks like forming relationships with recovering addicts who are letting God be at the heart of their transformation and healing. It looks like hearing people’s stories, sharing our own stories, and being completely open to letting the Holy Spirit lead our days.

As God has been gently changing my heart focus, the quality of my chicken matters less and less to me.

I absolutely do still care about nourishment and believe that we should be caring for our bodies well so that we can love others well. But if you’ve noticed an extreme shift in my recipes and food encouragement that has taken us from spending hours in the kitchen to keeping our food as simple as possible, this is why.

God’s people matter more than free range chicken. Loving others in the name of Jesus trumps all.

What should this love and outreach look like from one home to another? Only God has the answer to this question. Ask and you shall receive. This is guaranteed by Jesus himself.

So where does this leave our beloved free range chicken? It all depends on what God provides for each day. His ways are perfect, His provision is flawless, and we can rest peacefully knowing that we can trust Him completely.

Beyond the Free Range Chicken

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